breast cancer at 29

Today I found out I have breast cancer. ER+ve, HER2 -ve. All such a shock. I have no family history. I am fit and well. I just dont understand how this happened or how I am going to cope. I wasnt even going to go to the GP, don't know why i did, but clearly a good thing. 

I seem to be going through 1000 emotions an hour, crying then sad, then laughing then ok with it all etc etc. I have to stop working to isolate for surgery and that is huge for me, work is the good part of my life. 

I am so scared Im going to die, feels like my life has barely started. There were no nodes on my ultrasound, but Im so worried they will find them in theatre, but I wont know that for like 4 weeks which feels like a lifetime away. 

Any words or advice would be greatly received! 

  • Hi there and welcome ...

    So sorry you've been diagnosed so young ... it is so rare at your age ....  but take a deep breath ... all those emotions are really normal ... don't know anyone who was just o.k with it ... so many say it's like getting on the scariest rollercoaster ride ever.... hopeful and calm one minute ... then going down quickly and the "what ifs" fill our heads ... where you are now is the scariest ... because it's the unknown ... we hand over control of our lives to our oncology team....

    I came on here the same as you ... n 2017 I had a grade three breast cancer her 2 neg ... oestrogen positive... I spent two days in tears , seeing no one ... my son was in a panic too ... then my daughter in law sat us down and said no more what ifs and no more panicking... well take things as and when they pop up ... and well do it together ... so I snapped out ... picked myself up... got a pink pair vertual boxing gloves on ... and got ready to look it in the eye and give it all I've got ...

    When I came on here, a lovely lady took me under her wing... I started talking to about 5 / 6 other breast lasses ... all different stages and treatments... well wer all still here .. and one young lass like you has just had her second baby sinse her treatment finished ... the easiest bit for me was the op itself .. I had a total right masectomy... but only needed paracetamol after .. 

    It's not a walk in the park but it is doable... treatments come a long way .. we just hear the sad stories but there's lots living past it now .. all those other lasses I met ... they've gone back to their life post cancer.. my untie got the same a month after me .. she's doing well to .. so if you feel low and it gets overwhelming.. give yourself permission to feel what ever comes into your mind... it's o.k .. but then get back up.. boxing gloves back on .. and fight it back ... your not alone .. I was the first in my big family to get breast cancer .. it just the toss of a coin ... 

    Cancer wants us weak and giving in... don't let it wear you down ... you can do this ... Chrissie x


  • Hi there,

    sorry to hear about your diagnosis. I was told I had breast cancer this morning and all the emotions you are feeling I am feeling them too. I'm 32 with 2 small children and the constant fear of death is crippling. 

    I wish you so much luck with your surgery and if you want to talk please do add me as a friend. I don't have a treatment plan yet but given that we're both at early stages in our treatment  it would be nice to share the 'experience' with someone xxx

  • Hi 


    I am so sorry to hear of your diagnosis. I am a few steps behind you, I am awaiting results next Friday and have basically been told to expect cancer. So I am waiting to find out what stages and treatment will be involved. I am 38 and have 2 young boys which is what makes all of this worse as I am more scared how this will all affect them  

    Have they given you a date for surgery? X

  • I'm so sorry, its so hard but you have to try and stay positive, I'm 39 and had a mastectomy and lymph node removal last week, unfortunately 5 of my lymph nodes out of 14 were cancerous so I'm having a n mri tomorrow and then it's waiting again for results.i have 2 children and it breaks me but I have to be strong for them.I've been told that treatment is improving all the time, sending my love. Xx

  • This is exactly what I needed to read. And I keep going back and re-reading it, so thank you. Im going to get my boxing gloves on too! 

    K x

  • Hi, sorry you are going through this too - its horrible isnt it? And yes, I have added you - would be good to not feel so isolated in all of this. I hope you get a treatment plan soon, all of the unkown is a bit scary! x

  • Your very welcome ...

    One thing I would say above others is you've had an answer from a few going through it now ... that's what happened to me when I started ... we all chatted together ... about the good and not so good days .. I'm sure that's what helped us all through ... a high 5 for good news and a hand to hold on tough days .. 

    So I hope you all hold on together ... it's a marathon , not a sprint .. but when we all get in the cancer boxing ring together ... well together we'll kick cancers butt .... Chrissie x

  • I was given that kind of warning shot diagnosis before diagnosis actually confirmed too - I found that day in clinic worse than results day, because I knew what it would be. Im so sorry, that sounds really rough - I can barely manage my own emotions, without having to consider children and how they cope.

    Surgery is in 2 1/2 weeks. Have to essentially isolate from now because of covid, which adds another level of rubbishness - Im a key worker so was hoping to stay at work for as long as possible, but it is what it is I guess. 

  • How did you find the op if you dont mind me asking? And Im sorry to hear about the nodes. I hope the MRI went well - I dont think Ive had an MRI mentioned for me, do you know what its for? Is it to decide whether chemo etc? Treatment is definitely improving, I will keep on hoping for all of us! x

  • I think I feel a bit numb to it all right now. I can't understand how it's all happened. I almost didn't go to the doctors in the first place! 

    Aw well one good thing is because we are in lockdown anyway you aren't missing out on much. I'm on furlough with my main job so I'm home  just so bored! Get the puzzles out and try to keep busy x