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Dad diagnosed with cancer I just feel numb

Abbiw
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I just can't stop crying. My dad is my rock and I just don't no what I would do if he wasn't here. I feel like I can't look forward to anything anymore as I'm so scared something bad will happen to him. I'm really not coping. I'm also so worried for my 3 year old as he is extremely close to him. I'm not sure how to tell him that he is very ill and won't be able to play anymore. And I'm so scared for my mum as I don't think she would cope on her own. Her son and my brother died 10 years ago and now this. I just don't no what to do.

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    Hi Abby, 

    Let it flow, let those tears come.

    i am really new on here and by no means an expert. We got my husbands diagnosis 4 weeks ago and wow, talk about an emotional meltdown.

    i didn’t know what to think, say, do and of course my first thoughts we”that’s it, we’ll loose him”.

    Things have moved on very fast in the 3 weeks, shockingly fast, but my emotions have also moved on.

    Don’t get me wrong I am still have moments when the floodgates open, but as my brain has downloaded the information, it has become a little easier.

    Don’t try and be ‘strong’ (whatever that means). Just be a little kind to yourself. You have had shocking news; of course you will be a wreck and that is okay. Be free with your emotions and understAnd it is okay NOT to be okay.

    I have found this chat incredibly useful. Sure, they can’t change anything, but they do know what it feels like.

    best wishes

    hilts

     

  • Offline in reply to Hilts

    It's just so hard and all I keep thinking is the worst. I get more upset when I think he's not going to see my kids grow up and how upset my oldest will be if he's not here. I no I shouldn't as we haven't got the results from the scan yet to see if it's spread anywhere else and what the next steps are but I can't help thinking like it. I just don't want to loose him 

  • Offline in reply to Abbiw

    Hi, 

    Yep , that was me, exactly 3 weeks ago. It is fine NOT to be okay, you are human.

    As for thinking the worst, that is me all over. I was even thinking about where to hold the funeral and how my kids & me would cope when he popped off!!!!!!!. 

    We have has all the results back with treatment plan etc ( in only 3 weeks!!!!) and it is a bit better now at least we know what we are dealing with.

    what helped me in a very weird way was thinking ‘it could have been worse’. How on earth can I think that when you get a cancer diagnosis. Well, I thought my husband could have come down with something totally untreatable or got knocked over by a bus.

    At least he IS here and I am with him, I have to be thankful for that.

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