Hi Abby, 

Let it flow, let those tears come.

i am really new on here and by no means an expert. We got my husbands diagnosis 4 weeks ago and wow, talk about an emotional meltdown.

i didn’t know what to think, say, do and of course my first thoughts we”that’s it, we’ll loose him”.

Things have moved on very fast in the 3 weeks, shockingly fast, but my emotions have also moved on.

Don’t get me wrong I am still have moments when the floodgates open, but as my brain has downloaded the information, it has become a little easier.

Don’t try and be ‘strong’ (whatever that means). Just be a little kind to yourself. You have had shocking news; of course you will be a wreck and that is okay. Be free with your emotions and understAnd it is okay NOT to be okay.

I have found this chat incredibly useful. Sure, they can’t change anything, but they do know what it feels like.

best wishes

hilts

It's just so hard and all I keep thinking is the worst. I get more upset when I think he's not going to see my kids grow up and how upset my oldest will be if he's not here. I no I shouldn't as we haven't got the results from the scan yet to see if it's spread anywhere else and what the next steps are but I can't help thinking like it. I just don't want to loose him 

Hi, 

Yep , that was me, exactly 3 weeks ago. It is fine NOT to be okay, you are human.

As for thinking the worst, that is me all over. I was even thinking about where to hold the funeral and how my kids & me would cope when he popped off!!!!!!!. 

We have has all the results back with treatment plan etc ( in only 3 weeks!!!!) and it is a bit better now at least we know what we are dealing with.

what helped me in a very weird way was thinking ‘it could have been worse’. How on earth can I think that when you get a cancer diagnosis. Well, I thought my husband could have come down with something totally untreatable or got knocked over by a bus.

At least he IS here and I am with him, I have to be thankful for that.