Hi Ella. 

I can understand how you're feeling even though things are quite different between us I'm nearly, 70, was diagnosed Feb 2016 uncurable.

Classed as palliative care. Had 6 sessions of chemo plus other things. Did have a high cancer count over 2 years it kept going down, then slowly started to rise again over the next two years but still very low.

I was feeling fine thinking I've got plenty of years yet, then last test it's taken a big jump so more tests and scans and probably more chemo.

I can't deny I'm worried and probably 2 months wait while Dr's sort out what to do and count still rising. But I'm keeping positive and fighting because I'm looking after my disabled wife she needs 24 /7 care I'm her official carer.

You kneed to keep positive. 

It sounds like your parents are in denial, but I'm afraid I've no idea how to get them to help you, hopefully others will join you to talk soon. 

Good luck with your treatment and your future. 

Billy 

Hi Billy, 

Sorry to hear your Cancer count has gone up again. 

I thought it had gone away because of the hormone treatment?

Ceyenne

Hi ceyenne.. 

It's strange actually some of my cancer is receding and another is coming back, so more tests and scans to see what's going on. Then someone's got to figure out treatment options.. 

Still feeling fine. So that's main thing. And keeping positive. 

Love Billy xxx 

Hi Ella 

Im so sorry to hear that your cancer has returned . I take it you are only young as you have mentioned that you kept going with your schoolwork. Well done for doing that and continuing with your life as normal as possible . My daughter had cancer at the age of 28 and I thought this was young . But we all know cancer doesn't care who you are - age etc . 
with regards to your parents - it's hard to say what they are feeling . I know when my daughter had cancer it was the hardest thing I went through ........ I would have done it for her if I could . People deal with things very differently . They must be feeling that all this is so unfair on you . Maybe a bit guilty that it's not them . Their response to you could be a coping mechanism. Remember there are lots of professional people out there to help you . Please don't suffer alone . You must be feeling hard done by . Be strong as you obviously have been before and take that support that is out there . You really aren't alone . Bless you . X

Billy - like you said it never rains but it pours! 

Hi Ella,

That must feel like a kick in the teeth for you! 

You have every right to complain and rant about your sh1tty situation - only a saint wouldn’t and none of us are saints. This is a good place to have a rant without upsetting our loved ones. 

I’ll not make any excuses for your parents, we all suddenly realise at some stage that our parents are only human too and make as many mistakes as the rest of us.

The chances are your cancer never went away but you probably know that. 

You are absolutely right - the whole situation is unfair. Cancer is normally a disease of old age and very rare in young people - that’s unfair and the symptoms coming back is doubly unfair. Your parents’ attitude is unfair and so is their daughter having cancer. 

Whatever you read online or in the media, none of us are heroes or cancer warriors - no-one kicks its a5s either. We don’t choose to develop cancer and we do what’s necessary to survive it.

We all have wobbles along the way and the bravest of people regardless of their age get scared from time to time.

I guess all I’m saying is that what you’re feeling is perfectly normal and this is a safe place to express exactly how you are feeling!

Best wishes

Dave

Hi again Billy and any other Stage 4-er's.

I feel like I've been written off by my care team and  don't feel I can fight back.

My cancer had a party when I wasn't looking and went to too many places. I know so many women who only have spread to the lungs and they are not referred to palliative care at all.

I don't want to give up. I'm only fifty four and never had a thing wrong with me before this cancer. Now my spine is bent and the top and bottom and the doctor's won't be bothered to do anything about it just chemo and bone strengthener which won't correct the spinal deformity. I don't see how I can survive this cancer in so many places.

Thanks for listening. 

Ceyenne

You didn't say how many places it's bitten you, remember I've got it six. 

If your having chemo thares a chance it'll shrink well or go, then a chance of having work on your spine.

Please keep fighting and keep positive 

Love Billy xxx 

Hi Chriss

Ive never actually messaged on here before but have been reading various posts for over a year now. In Dec 2018 my mum got diagnosed with stage 2 breast cancer, she had he lump removed & had chemo & radiotherapy. She finished her treatment is August 2019. Great we all thought, that’s that all done with time to move on. However about 4 weeks ago we got the news that it had returned in the same breast. She has now had that breast removed & has been told today that it was 6cm & was in some of the lymph nodes. She’s got to have chemo & radiotherapy again. We’re all just a bit gutted really but reading some of your positive posts has really lifted us up. Hopefully we will get it this time. I’m sorry for jumping on this thread I just wanted to say how it’s lovely to see someone so positive. I have also read that you use CBD oil. This is something we are looking into also.

Thanks for reading xxx