Hi Billy,

So sorry to hear about the increased count and need for more scans. 

Hope the meds aren't too unpalatable.

Yes, keep positive - that's all we can do.

I feel I've been waiting for ages too. That awful diagnosis when friend told possible could wake up next day and suddenly a function would be gone forever and no one could say when or what function would go first, but to be prepared for the drop offs. Had to put it all out of my mind to stay sane, keep not just my own but my friend's spirits up. 

I really feel for you because I know what cognitive change brings and your situation as someone having cancer yet also being a carer is a tough one.  

I know you seek to get the most out of each day, loving Bren and that lovely dog of yours... Pets aren't allowed where I live - would so love to have bought my friend a dog. 

Used to get therapeutic doggy strokes going out on walks - knew people who would stop and talk and their dogs would come to say hello, but you can't do that now. So we smile from afar. 

I'm not sure whether Lisa ever counted the goldfish. Hope your breakfast is a tasty one! When I was little we often had smoked kippers.

Am sending you many good wishes and hoping the meds do good. Your attitude is amazing, Billy – an example to us all. 

Again sorry your news wasn't so good today. But hopefully still many moments of joy and happy eats.

xx

Hi Billy,

sorry to hear about your news and that you've got so long to wait. As the last week tells you for me that's the worst bit. Please keep positive. I'm sure you will as you were so encouraging to me . 
hands off my fish. Although they are only two enormous goldfish in a small pond I lovr watching them . You should see all the birds that come to drink that's lovely too. Little things eh!

i cleated our two little garden sheds today so that was a good job but think too much sun. The best thing was one of my best friends delivered and left at the door a cream tea for myself and hubby

how nice was that. 
akthoygh you've not had the best of news I hope you and Bren are having a nice dey

lisa x 

Hi hope,

so glad you had a long sleep. I did sleep but broken again . Hope you feeling good today. I've been really busy making up for last week when I did nothing but worry.

just said to Billy my friend delivered a cream tea to enjoy in the sun. 
mess really cheered by that.

think may have a siesta too much sun I think

hope you've had a nice relaxing day with no stress

hugS

Lisa x

Hi Lisa,

How grand getting a surprise cream tea - magical!

Sounds like you have some truly inspired friends. 

Good on you too for cleaning the sheds. Enjoy your well-earned siesta!

Hopefully the night sleep will be less broken when pent-up stress clears.

Waiting can be so very hard. Have been there while many tests done (repeat MRIs, CT, PET, lumbar puncture etc) and after each you wait... I should have a waiting diploma! 

Hugsxx

Lisa 

Glad your feeling more positive and getting the cleaning done finally. 

I'm nearly always busy what with house, garden and bren I've not got time to be worried about things. The busier you keep the more you relax and keep positive.

Love. Billy xxx 

Hi Billy,

looks like you've been busy. I'm not feeling it today. My partner had a flurry of calls this morning for blood tests , pre chemo checks . He starts in the 12th . Maybe it's just got me or maybe it's because I did so much yesterday I'm  flagging a bit.

just been cleaning , all I seem to do st the moment!! 
 

im not overthinking though just dealing with the now.

weather is still nice and pond  is still clear. Still got two fish!!

have a lovely day 

Lisa x

Hi all,

I got good news. ..Beasties removed with good margins. High grade dysplasia - needed to come out - but caught in time. Phew! 

Am going to need follow-up and there will be further surgeries but not urgent.

I probably won't log on for a while. Best if I forget about beasties until I do my monthly skin check. So I am going to wish you all the best Lisa and really hope that your hubby's treatment goes well. It is a lot to take on board. You will have days when you feel more or less drained/emotional.

At least cleaning gets you ahead and will help with sleep. 12th is really soon. So many good wishes to you both and hope all goes as planned.

Billy - I don't know whether you've spoken to them, but I've had brilliant telephone support from Admiral Nurses in the past. Getting the right meds really matters and it can be trial and error to get the best combination...  Also hope you manage to keep your own uninvited guest under control with new meds. 

Sadly I am not allowed to sunbathe. Haven't done so for decades... yet still the beasties come. Well I'm watching for them. Gonna catch 'em...

Lots of hugs to you bothxx

Hi sunny. 

Going to miss you, I'll probably have to stir Lisa up more now.

So glad you had good margins that's definitely a plus. 

Best wishes to you as well. 

Good luck with your later treatment what ever you need. 

Love... Billy... Xxx 

Hi Billy,

Thanks! You've kept my spirits up as well as Lisa's. 

Treatment will be more surgery over time (some other lesions under suspicion). Lots of beasties in waiting. 

Also probably some genetic testing given recent results added to previous history of dysplasia - have had multiple surgeries. Was lucky this time as they took a good margin first time around so no need for double excision.  Latest results dramatically increase my risk not just of melanoma but pancreatic cancer. 

Certainly have to stay off the sugar! (Already got sent to Boot Camp...diabetes prevention programme. It was like being back at school. Behaviour change programme. Ha! I'm not overweight and I eat healthily and do plenty of exercise. So I think that in my case it's genetic. I really miss eating cake!)

Really hope you get all the meds sorted out for you and Bren. 

Love, sunnyxx