Hi there, what a horrible way to be told the worst news none of us want to hear.  My husband has stage 4 lung cancer and the original survival rate was 7% but that was three years ago, so ignore the statistics they don't give a true picture of what may happen.  Secondly stop surfing the net.  It's pointless and scares you.  You need to stay as focused as you can on hoping for the best, the worrying makes it so much worse and your mind gets bogged down with it all.  I know it's hard and human nature is to think the worst.  You will soon have all your options in front of you then the only way is forward for you both.  Let us know what happens and I'll put you on my follow the thread.  Carol x 

Hi, thank you so much for your reply. It's been so hard with the covid situation. All consultations done by telephone .when we were phoned by the secretary to the oncologist and given a telephone appointment in the 28th we were geared up for it. But to receive a phone call with devastating news from someone who could only give bare bones information was really harsh. We were not expecting it and are both in shock. 
as I said it seems a long time until Thursday but we are prepared for the worst now. It's so hard not to search the internet , being in lockdown doesn't help as we can't really do anything outside to take our minds off it.

i will keep you updated and will try not to read anything in line in the interim 

thanks again 

Hello,

You are at the worst time ever, in this time of unknowns .  You will feel the shock somewhat less when you have a clear idea of what's what. You need to make sure you take care of yourself, eat properly, even when you think you couldn't. Try to sleep and just get through this horrible few days, then you will, at least, be fit to deal with what comes next.  As Carol said, this isn't something to learn about from the internet, and, in any case, all prognostication is based on generalities, and everyone is different.  If you read Carol's blog you will see it isn't an easy journey, but it can be managed, and it is an amazing read. It feels like a book with characters who feel like friends.

I wish you and your husband the very best. You may have a pleasant surprise when you do speak to the oncologist.  I hope so!

Christine xxx

Oh Christine thank you so much. I feel

so dreadful and so so guilty as I should be so strong for my partner. I can't eat sleep think just want to spend the whole time googling the worst statistics. 
I need to be strong and I will be. It's just such a shock and a strange way to have found out and not found out 

thank you all so much 

Lisa x

Hi again.
If you read a few different threads on here you will find that we have all been in the exact same place you are in now. Then when you read on you find many are still here helping other people sometimes years and years after their diagnoses. The noise in your head will get less as you know more about what you are facing.  Don't google anything. If you must check things out, do it on here, it will be less frightening. 
 

Christine xx

Thank you. Got given a stage of t4n2 by the nurse and told to look at what it means in the Macmillan site. 
told it was advanced and to ask oncologist for further details. I think that's been the problem and why we are in shock and I am thinking the worst. 
im not going to surf anymore and just try to get some calm in my brain. I'm automatically thinking the worst and waking up with a knot in my stomach. 
I'm thanking you all so much you have no idea how it's so nice to hear from people that have been in our situation and to understand the sheer fear. My husband is such a gentle giant and seems to be keeping it all inside. Where as I just keep crying 

thank you x

thsnk you all again . 

Christine,

I have just read Carols blog  and I agree what an amazing blog. It's really reassuring to speak to people who have been in the situation I am now.

Thank you again

lisa 

Hi Ladyf,

Welcome to our chat forum. I am so sorry to hear that you have been left in this position by a nurse, who should never have told you this.

Still, what's done is done and, the one advantage of knowing in advance is that both you and your hubby can put your heads together and draw up a list of questions for the consultant before Thursday. It is all too easy to forget important questions in the heat of the moment, so keep this list beside you when you are talking to the consultant.

I hope thathe has some better news when you speak to him. Please update us when you can.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Yes it certainly is strange times to be dealing with a cancer diagnosis. I agree with Jolsmine, the damage had been done now and we will just have to see what Thursday brings. 
My poor partner is having to deal with this all alone.he had three scans and a resection, none of which I could be there for, phone consultations and chemo which will be alone. 

I just feel for him and want to be strong for him but I can't  even be there. I'm hoping that we will soon have a path through this . You all have no idea how it feels to be able to chat to people about how I'm feeling. 
Ive been fortunate enough to have never before experienced cancer and this shock so serious diagnosis had my head all over the place. 
I'm hoping for an explanation Thursday ,and will try to ignore the terrible prognosis I've read on the internet

thanks 

Lisa