Hi,

I am new to the group and BC. I was diagnosed in July. I had  a partial mastectomy with reconstruction 2 weeks ago. Yesterday I went back for the results only to be told that my margins weren’t all clear and I have to go back in on Friday for another op to remove more tissue. I’m also waiting for results of Oncotype test so decide what my treatment plan is. I haven’t been frightened or fazed by anything so far but yesterday I came away really *** off! My wound has just healed and now they are going to re open it. But hey ho. I’m 48 and like you have always been healthy and am crap at being ill. I do hope you don’t become down beat x

Hi Cazrosie - I am currently being offered a lumpectomy (assume same as partial mastectomy) or a mastectomy + reconstruction for a 3.5cm globular tumour. With the lumpectomy they indicated I would go from a B to an A cupsize so offered me a breast reduction on the good side. Size is important to me so I would rather go for a reconstruction to get symetry and also avoid touching the good breast? Are you happy to tell me about your situation? Did you have the same type of cancer? How much of the breast did they have to take? What type of reconstruction did you have (via liposuction or LIDAP)? Di they do the reconstruction at the same time or later after radiotherapy? I am sorry your margins were not clear - did you go for a further lumpectomy? - they suggested that this may well be the case with me due to the globular cancer type that I have. Were you - are you happy with your results? I do hope all went well with you after this post - best wishes Karen

God Sam! Sounds pretty horrendous but surely you will be left with the body of a super model?!:wink:

I can imagine that the compression bandages / body suit are not the most comfortable! I have a "fold in your body fat" vest and I struggle wearing that!

My youngest son passed his driving test today! Second attempt and involved me having to skive off work to take hIm to Winchester. My niece is also learning to drive at the mo and has bought herself a little old polo. I have to say she scares the bejesus out of me when she drives!! I have a new found respect for driving instructors. I went back to the gym yesterday after finding excuses for the past 3 weeks. Boy was it hard work!!

Christine I have every faith that you will perfect the portrait - we know how much of a perfectionist you are! I'm a very impatient person so any hobby that requires you to take your time and takes a long time, I'm useless!! One of my friends bought me a starter knitting set. I had a go, managed to give it about 30 min then gave up. I used to do a lot of cross stitching in my younger years but my eye sight is so pants now that it isn't even appealing. 
 

caroline xx

Er hello Christine & Caroline, I looked like a model before I'll have you know (yeah right, you're right to ask 'a model of what?'), I do however always tell people that if I had even a sliver of being photogenic that I would, of course, have been a super model back in the day....an accountant was only just behind this option, of course...

Yeah the reconstruction palaver is not for everyone, very doable and I'd definitely do it again but if you're not a fan of surgery, being pummelled within an inch of your life and time in recovery I'd advise maybe not.

Good news on the dry bed Christine! Mine is hit (or hot as I originally typed...quite possibly more appropriate?) and miss.  I get tested soon (blood test) to see if am post menopausal, presumably I can't yet be if still having mad sweats?

Just as well your daughter isn't an art critic Christine...I remember on a previous portrait that you weren't at all confident on the eyes but they all came together at the end, another case of that maybe?  And I get tonnes of pleading looks from the furry critters I share my house with although its definitely food rather than exercise related, lazy bl00dy good-for-nothing animals!

Am today finally free of the nipple donut and the compression pants (which feel like a tree must when they grow around barbed wire around my waist where they gather, I may have been a bit optimistic about the size I bought...)....HURRAH!

Good news on the driving Caroline, hopefully less reliance on you as a taxi service?  Well done getting back to the gym, I was back after 5 weeks absence last week and its amazing how your body can't do what it did before (and how much my bum ached on the bike ride too!)....but well worth it.  I hear about muscle memory, think my muscles must have dementia.

Do you think your eyesight worsened post cancer treatments? I'm sure mine did Caroline, I use reading glasses and before cancer was a 1 and am now a 2.5, my father (an optician) tells me that's quite a jump in a couple of years.

Right, time I did some work!

Tara X

Sam, you do make me laugh!

In regards to the blood test to check for menopause status - did your GP order that? I'd be interested to know where I stand in that respect. Although you hear how awful letrozol is, I think I'd rather stick with my tamoxifen. My poor hubby has to cope with freezing temperatures and windows open, in the bedroom! Advantages are he tends to stay on his side of the bed as my side is like a furness :silly::laugh:

I do think my eye sight has gotten worse too! I've got an appointment next week at the opticians. I decided to give multi focal contacts a go but the ones they gave me weren't even as strong as my glasses so useless! I bought myself some 2.5 reading glasses - they are perfect! 

Good to hear you are starting to ditch the restrictive clothing/donut nipple ring! Maybe use the nipple donut to sit on, on the bike as the gym or is it a bit too small :wink:

I've canned the running - found it aggravated my neck pain so have been walking fast/on an incline. I've signed up for a breast cancer 10 mile walk, in May so need to get practising! My friend told me, the other day that she is doing dry January, couch to 5k and the 16:8 fasting diet! I've told her I'm hoping my half a stone just falls off and I'll see her in February! 
Anyway, ladies - Friday is my day off, I have a large glass of wine in my hand and am meeting a friend for lunch tomorrow (walking so I can get some miles in and have a drink :wink: Hope you all have a lovely weekend! No January blues for me! 
Caroline xx

Hi Vee,

Just wishing you all the best for today. Please let us know how you get on.

Christine xxx

Happy Friday, Caroline!

Sam, apologies! I should have realised that with all your cycling and exercising, that you would already have the body of a supermodel.

xxx

Hi Christine, Caroline & Sam,

Hope you are all ok and behaving yourselves? Thank you for remembering today x

The result of the 2nd biopsy didn't reveal anything sinister. Just breast tissue, all is 'normal' I hear. Huh! I think I can safely say I'm anything but normal :laugh:

So 25th Jan, I see Oncology to sign chemo consent form, have picc line put in, and have a chat about possible hair loss, nausea, etc...

BCN said chemo usually starts 2 wks after 25th Jan. It's all of a sudden becoming very real and I must say a little scary. 

Take care ladies

Much love

Vee xxx

Hi Vee,

that is great news. Sam is your lady to give you the low down on chemo. But we are here to support! 
Well done on today xx

Morning ladies,

I hope all is well with you. 

I forgot to mention that an MRI was booked on the 14th Jan, which I didn't expect to hear from them for at least 1-2 weeks away. However, on 17th Jan, I got a short notice cancellation, who asked me to attend the same day. After the MRI, I asked the radiographer how long the results will be. He told me it wouldn't be long. 

I missed 2 calls from the hospital yesterday, as I was shattered through not sleeping properly the night  before. I did call the hospital back on the number they called me on, but it comes back as invalid. I'm worried and anxious as to why the hospital would call me 4 days after a scan if it wasn't urgent. On the other hand, the hospital didn't leave a message for me to contact them! As its the weekend, I doubt I'll hear anything until Monday. Maybe it was something to do with my Oncology app on 25th Jan. Who knows?

Take care ladies 

Much love

Vee xx

Hi Vee, 

I work in a hospital and know that the number that they call out on isn't one you can redial. Maybe give a call to your bcn and ask if they know anything about the missed call. And like you said, if it was urgent they would have maybe left a message with a number you could call back. 
Caroline xx

Hi Vee,

Hoping all goes well today,

Christine xxx

Hi Vee,

Hoping all goes well today,

Christine xxx

Hi Christine x

Hope all is well with you 

Thank you

Vee xx

Hi Vee

Long time no hear!  How are you and what is happening?

This isn't a demand for info if you don't want to discuss it, I'm just a bit worried about our new friend.

love

Christine xxx

Hey Christine, ladies, 

I thought you had forgotten about me?

How is everyone getting on? I've had a lot going on. Lots of appointments. 

I've had my first treatment. My Chemo was originally for an hour, but I had to have a cannula in the back of my hand. Because of this, it lasted 2 hours. (All explained below).

I was supposed to have a port fitted in my inner upper left arm, as the lump is on my right and the nurse wanted to steer away from the breast where I might need an op to remove sentinel nodes. After 4 attempts, the nurse apologised and said she would have to try the right arm, and she still couldn't get it in. I ended up with 2 badly bruised arms and nowt to show for it. The nurse ordered a chest port, which  should be fitted soon (I hope ) in time for my next round.

All went well after all Chemo was administered, I didn't feel a thing. While waiting for my hubby to pick me up, I felt an immense wave of sickness threatening to splurge out and embarass me in front of all the new found friendly crew (patients and nurses) I'd met and warmed to. But I held it in like a good-un. Everyone was asking "are you alright Vee"? I didnt turn around when I headed for the door on my departure, I could only raise my my hand above my head for a quick wave. 

By the time I got home, I felt so sick, I only had some water, put my pj's on and crawled into bed, and there I stayed until my bladder could take no more. I didn't even wash the conditioner out from having the cold cap. The nausea has continued since  Chemo, but not as bad. Today, I actually felt somewhat human enough to take hubby to dialysis, put washing on after  changing all bed linen, put dried clothes away, washed dishes and put them away cleaned rest of house, washed the car, did homemade soup for lunch and vacuumed. 

I have never felt so ill in my whole life! When I was in bed feeling sorry for myself, I could imagine everything piling up and getting out of hand, so I used the little energy I had to sort stuff out. Someone please tell me it gets a little better. 

Take care ladies

Much love  

Vee xxx

Hi,

I'm sorry, I can't tell you anything about chemo as I was too old to benefit from it.  

You sound as if you are doing too much, though.  Wash the car??? Mine has green mould on the passenger side cos I never see it. I park right outside my front door up against the garden fence.I'm sure you are supposed to rest after chemo!  The search for veins isn't something I have experienced either, mine are only too eager to gush forth when required, and even when not required some times.

it's good to hear you still sound to be facing it as cheerfully as could possibly be expected. I hope Sam, the Yorkshire Wonder Woman gets in touch because she has had the lot and can tell you much more than I can. It must be bearable because she still manages to sound cheerful, although that could be the old Yorkshire grit we hear about. I'm a Lancastrian myself and I think we're supposed to be pretty gritty, too.

Take care, I know it must be hard to let things go, but I would say rest is more important than a clean car

love

Christine xx 

Hi ladies

Sorry its been so long, things are and have been challenging with my father.  Am up in Leyburn currently, was trying to work up here as well as spend time with him and help out my step-mother but the working bit is proving to be an uphill struggle, there’s so much to do to help my step-mother as my fathers condition worsens.  He’s got a friend around currently so am trying to occupy myself rather than reflecting on his condition and inevitable death….its not really working but will battle on all the same.

On the plus side I have FINALLY received the letters of administration in connection with the mothers death last year so there won’t be too much overlap of parental death sorting! Bloody ridiculous eh?  Anyway her house is now on the market so hopefully that will be sold soon (and whilst the housing market is still buoyant).

However still keen to pass on my experts knowledge and see it as my role to share experiences that can often be seen as painful or negative so for our pals who are still going through treatment and surgery…

Vee, 

I too had a PORT fitted, best decision ever!  And like you had to have an annoying chemo the old fashioned way (via cannula) before the port was done.  It is sooooo much easier and less painful with the port…and less fannying around for the poor nurses trying to located often elusive veins too.  Hope you get yours soon, really small & straightforward operation btw and you can’t tell its there other than a small scar.

You really need to tell your BCN about the sickness as they will have you initially on the cheaper anti-sickness drugs that they sent you home with and you may need the more expensive stuff so please do tell them how you were so they can give you the right stuff booth before the chemo & after.  I was very lucky that I never felt sick per se, just nauseous and rough for the week after, but how you feel is very personal and everyone is unique so comparing experiences needs to be done with caution.

For most people (I was on the MacMillan forum too so have read quite a bit about those going through chemo- MacMillan’s online community have a breast cancer monthly chemo thread for those going through it which you may find useful (I did)) they feel rough for the first weeks post chemo (I had mine Weds, took drugs till the Sunday/Monday and felt rough till the following Saturday) so fingers crossed you’ll start to feel better soon.  I was able to work and exercise outside my rough week.

It is generally the case though that as the chemo sessions get towards the end the after effects do get somewhat worse, in my experience they do but are still very manageable.  I had my final chemo (12 in total maybe?) Dec 2019 and managed to eat a large plate of Christmas fodder a week after (I am a pig however!).

And I agree with Christine re trying to do too much straight after chemo, please be kind to yourself, you’re no good to you or your hubby if you overdo it.

Good luck Vee and hope everyone else is well XX

Hello Sam the superwoman,

Do you realise that you never gave us one hint of what you were going through during your chemo etc, I knew you were being stoic about it all but you were just lying to us!  I'm glad you are telling it how it is, now, so that Vee will know what's in store and what to do to make it as bearable as possible. 
I'm sorry you are going through it again with your father.  My parents' deaths were only 14 months apart 
and I was the one who had to sort everything out. My dad had been lured by a local solicitor and the chance of a free will, to make them the executors, who took their permitted year,  and they sold their house through their associated estate agent for half its worth! It's no wonder I ran away then, to an adventure in Central America with a very unsuitable new boyfriend.  I saw the error of my ways after 6 months and came back without him!  Actually, I found a lump in my breast - no relation to my real cancer 25 years later - and was advised to return to zum to get it checked out properly ( and for free).

I hope you don't go mad, like that, when it's all sorted! 
Thank you for taking the time to help Vee in the middle of everything that's going on around you. But, as I keep making it my business to tell others, you need to take care of yourself in the middle of everything! 
I need you to live up to your admission to be lazy, so I don't feel guilty about my absolute slothfulness in cold weather!

Good luck, Vee, I knew Sam would be a count of information for you.

Samneedscoffee21, Good luck, also, I hope you got the advice you were hoping for

Caroline, hoping everything is going well for you and your family, don't work too hard!

Lots of love to you all

 Christine xxx

Hi Sam, Christine and others!

oh Sam, sorry to hear things are getting harder with your dad's illness. Funny (or not really) but have just been listening to a podcast, while at the gym, with Greg Wise taking about caring for his sister at the end of her life. There's also a breast cancer surgeon who had breast cancer who is on instagram and does weekly videos where she answers people's breast cancer questions. She also has a website - Don't Ignore the Elephant where they do podcasts about things we don't like to talk about. Sam, might be worth a listen. They also do one about death. I suppose, working with a palliative care team, I find it all fascinating! 
 

Christine, hi lovely lady. Hope your knee is ok, dog is ok and how's the painting going. How's your daughter? And the puppy?!

Vee, hope you are doing ok. Don't think we've forgot you if we are quiet! I think we just don't pop on here as much as we used to!! Just pop in a message and we will be here! 
Samneedscoffee, hope we've been able to give you some useful advice! I know it's all scary times. But use us for suppprt if you need us.

All good here! Hubby is away in Canada, snowboarding with his mates. Been gone since last Tuesday, back on Thursday this week. It's been bliss :laugh:

Work is busy in many sideway ways, I'm trying to exercise more, as my middle spread tyre needs some serious attention but my mouth isn't getting the message. I'm trying to walk a lot more - less impact on my neck. I should have amazing legs by the end of the year!:wink:

Ive signed up for a Breast Cancer Now 10 mile walk, in May. It's in Oxfordshire and im doing it with my niece. 
Anyway, off to do some hula hooping - good for the waist!!

Take care ladies 

Caroline xx

Hi Caroline,

The old knees are behaving themselves today which tempts me to catch up on my house cleaning. I may resist the temptation, who knows!

Archie has turned into the kindest sweetest dog in the world - sometimes.  He still finds forbidden things irresistible if I have left them within fairly easy reach, I've just learned to be a bit more careful where I leave things.  He did have a chew on my new Christmas bobble hat. It was a Christmas gift, not a Christmas theme. He only made a small hole in the furry lining so it's still lovely and warm and wearable. He does now leave things before he can get to them if I see him and say No. He's just sneaky if I'm not around and he sees something that piques his interest. He waits eagerly whenever I'm cooking because I tend to drop things as I'm chopping etc. If it's ok for him to eat, for example a bit of safe fruit or vegetable I tell him ok and he'll go for it, but if I say no, wonder of wonders he leaves it for me to pick up.  It's only taken me five years to get to this stage! 

Bobbin goes from angel puppy to demon dog at the speed of light, as you probably well remember  from your recent puppy heaven. He was top of the class at his puppy training classes. He thought it was party time when we got there, all those lovely puppies to play with and constant treats being given. I don't think he's quite got the message that there isn't ALWAYS going to be a treat, though as he soon resorts to the unwanted behaviour when he doesn't get one. The classes finished last week, so my daughter has organised puppy playtime at her house, today, with two of the other classmates. She invited me down to watch them but I'm going to be busy doing something else.  The two boys who are coming were dreadful barkers when they first started and I'm sure they will bark for England in a new place. Archie is so kind to Bobbin when he attacks, relentlessly, but I wouldn't inflict three puppies on him.

My daughter is finally coming to after her Covid, ten weeks later, she is going back to work next week, so I will be providing doggy day care, as usual. We had a trial run yesterday, while she went shopping. She was gone a few hours because she could actually mooch round the shops without a mask on. She was dreadfully claustrophobic when wearing one.  (I'm still wearing one when I go shopping. I've bought the FFP2 masks that give the wearer some protection as well as those around them.) I was expecting to have a horrible morning with Bobbin doing his best to make Archie play and poor old Archie trying to escape him all the time.  I was, however, pleased to see that if I told Bobbin, quite sternly, to leave Archie alone, he would do so, for quite a few minutes and eventually he realised what was expected of him and I had quite a nice morning.  I took the dogs round to see one of my neighbours who loves animals but is totally housebound so can't have a dog of his own.  Bobbin sat quietly on his lap for half an hour much to my neighbour's delight, while Archie sat quietly by his side.  I suppose we can put up with a bit of bad behaviour at home when they are so well behaved outside.

The painting is on a hiatus at the moment, this baby's face is still not appearing so I'm leaving it for a bit, hoping that when I go back to it, the face will magically appear!  
Did you expect to get a short answer to your questions?  I'm sure you didn't.  

lots of love xxx

Loved your long response. :happy:

Cheers.  I didn't try hard enough to resist temptation, so I'm now knackered but have a clean house for the first time in what feels like weeks!

xxx