Oh gawd Tiredout, what an awful reaction to have to deal with from your mum :(  She must be terrified and I understand that but it's an incredible extra burden for you to take on.

I don't know how you're managing all this, I hope they get some help sorted out for you really quickly as this is far too much to take on alone physically and mentally.

Please bear in mind that Cancer Research have a phone number for help and support, I know MacMillan where we are offer a counselling service by phone or in their offices too.  It's early days for your mum accepting her diagnosis obviously but it might help you to have people on the end of a phone to talk to for your own wellbeing.  Obviously I don't know your mum or how mentally astute she still is but it might also be worthwhile discussing with her medical team whether it's possibly better overall to play along with her denial (if she continues it), early days for that but just something you might want to bear in mind.  You could end up both denying it while both actually knowing it's the truth but if it prevented arguments about it ...

Please just, whatever you do, make sure you have a lot of support around you.

LJxx

Hi there

well me and mum plodding along. The community nurse has been and done her assessment but didn’t look good mum couldn’t remember when World War Two was yet talks about it all the while

her hearing is fading slowly and yesterday when asking her if she wanted to try a little quiche she didn’t know what it was or what a bourbon buscuit was

she had a couple of good days like yeah I got my mum back then yesterday she slept till midday got up and slept in chair all day till 7 in the evening and went to bed at eleven which felt like I was losing her again

we have the appointment with the lung dr Monday so hoping to get some answers to what they plan to do to make her comfortable 

sf x

Glad to hear from you.

Sorry it's still proving so tough, but happy that things are moving in terms of external support.

Think of you often, I just cannot imagine going through this with my parents, so harrowing.  I hope you get some answers on Monday and that help keeps coming.  I feel positive that in the latter days you'll get more of 'your mum back' as period of lucidity do seem to be quite common as the end approaches.  I just really hope you get some of that and get some reminders of your mum in her better days.

Give me a shout if you need to rant or just chat.  Also, I'm pretty much off work for the foreseeable so if I can do any Googling for support in your area or anything I'd rather be of use to others, please just let me know, and I really do mean that, I'm tearing the hair I don't have out here!

LJxx