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Recently diagnosed with secondary cancer

susanw
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My beloved partner was diagnosed with esophageal cancer in Dec 2016 and very quickly then told he also had secondary cancer in his liver and lungs. We were told last week that palliative chemo isn't an option because his breathing is so poor as he also has pulmonary embolisms in both lungs. We have been given 4-6 months. Its breaking my heart to see my once vital and energetic man struggle for breathe simply walking a few steps.We may be offered radiotherapy on his enlarged lymph nodes on which are pressing on his windpipe but its not a certainty. I feel like I am greivinhg his death whilst hes alive, we had so much more planned to do and now its all been taken away.

 

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    Hello Susan and welcome to Cancer Chat,

    That cat on your profile picture is irresistably cute. It almost looks like he or she is smiling!

    It is so sad what is happening to your partner and that he isn't able to have palliative chemotherapy. It all seems to have happened so fast as he was only diagnosed in December. What a difficult time it must be for you to see him like this. I am sure he is feeling comforted by the fact you are by his side and I hope you can still do together some of the things you had planned to do and to spend as much quality time together as you can.

    You have joined the right forum though to talk to others who can truly understand how you are feeling at the moment and I hope they will be along soon to share their own story with you of looking after a loved one with cancer.

    Best wishes,

    Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator

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    Hello Susan, I usually read posts rather than reply but couldn't resist replying to your post as my hubby Mike was diagnosed with oesophagus cancer in March 2015. Fortunately Mike was operable. 9 weeks of pre op chemo followed by operation on 1/9/15 then followed by another 9 weeks post op course of chemo, so he's been through and coped well with the harsh but necessary treatment to give him-self every chance. The July 2016 oncology appointment knocked us for six when we were told that the cancer had spread to the liver and Mike was now on palliative care, then followed another 6 months of juice from hell chemo. Mike took his last chemo tablet yesterday. Our next oncology appointment will be on Tuesday 31/1/17 when we will find out latest scan results. I so understand how you are feeling and wish you both all the best on this unwelcomed roller coaster that plays havoc with our emotions. Maggie
  • Offline in reply to Moderator Lucie

    Thank you so much for your kind words. We were informed two days ago that they are going to try radiotherapy on his enlarged lymph nodes in his eosphagues its still only palliative but it may help his breathing which is becoming more difficult with each day. He has so much hope that this will be a miracle cure even though he understands the prognosis   but as he grows weaker and less able to do things he gets frustrated angry and sad.

     

  • Offline in reply to Moderator Lucie

    The cat is a watercolour iof my cat Sophie I am an artist by profession and its the thing that keeps me sane Sophie cat seems to know my partner is ill she follows him everywhere and sleeps at his feet on a night.

     

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    Hello Susan.

    I do feel for you....but you never know. I am in a similar position having being diagnosed back in November 2015 with T3 Oesophageal Cancer. Had pre-op chemo, operation (Oesophogectomy), post-op chemo....all very tough times. Was hoping for a good outlook but after scan in September 2016 found it had spread to liver and now inoperable.

    I have been a lot more fortunate than yourselves in that I am having chemo with a drug called Herceptin which should extend lifespan and about to start my 4th cycle. My wife has been through an emotional roller coaster, but I feel surprisingly calm and as positive as you can be. The body and being as positive as possible can help a great deal in fighting the condition and extending lifespan.

    I do hope that the course of radiotherapy can improve your partners condition and improve breathing and wellbeing for the time being and wish you all of the best during these very difficult times.

    Regards.

    Simon.

  • Offline in reply to susanw

    Hello Susan,

    I hope the palliative radiotherapy helps with your partner's breathing and makes him feel a little bit more comfortable. It's a very difficult time for both him and you at the moment but he must really appreciate having you by his side as well as Sophie the cat. I have often read on the forum how our four-legged companions seem to know when one is ill and how much love and affection they provide. How sweet that she sleeps at his feet at night.

    I can't believe that the cat picture is a watercolour that you made. It looks incredibly real - you are very talented!

    Best wishes,

    Lucie

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