Hi Ange,

I understand your concerns but your Dad is the only one who can make this decision. That said, if the Oncologist has any doubts about his fitness to undergo chemo, it won't be allowed allow to start. 

If it works, the chemo will shrink his cancer and this will alleviate some his symptoms. Knowing that you have a cancer growing inside you is the most scary thing imaginable and stage 4 doesn't leave you with many options. He probably thinks that he has only one shot at this and he wants to go for it. 

Talk to your Dad and explain your worries to him, you are bound to worry under the circumstances it is only natural.

Best wishes

Dave

Hi Ange

I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad and that you and your family are going through this difficult time. My Dad has a similar diagnosis. I have bad days (as you will see from some of my posts on here) when I struggle to stay positive and I'm scared and upset and angry. And other days I accept that this is our new normal and I'm so thankful for 31 years with the most amazing Dad who has worked so hard to give me the best start in life. 

My Dad started his palliative chemo 10 days ago. He'd lost a lot of weight prior to this and like you I was worried that he seemed frail. The first week really knocked it out of him. He suffered from sensitvity to his nerve endings, nausea, diarrohea, loss of taste, fatigue. I'll admit I was scared that he was going down hill rapidly. Then I spoke to him yesterday and he seemed to have turned a corner, he seemed much better in himself and he was managing to eat more than before the chemo started. 

It's a *** situation, there's no denying that, filled with uncertainty. But I'm pretty sure without chemo your Dad's prognosis would be much less than if the chemo is successful. That's got to be worth trying. Like DaveK said, the Drs wouldn't let him start the treatment if they didn't think he was up to it. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you. Please let us know how things go.

Rachel x