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Today was the day - single Mum newly diagnosed with breast cancer

vicky1
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Hey everyone,

I've read lots of these posts and been overwhelmed by the support everyone receives so I guess that's why I'm posting!

Today I was diagnosed with HER2+ breast cancer. I'm not sure if it's sunk in yet even with the amount of times I've said it. 

I am 44 and a single mum of two children 10 & 13, so was in the mind set I was too young for cancer even after finding the lump and being told it was suspicious. I went today with a glimmer of hope it was not going to be cancer.

My mum died of breast cancer in 2015 so I have seen the impact it has on lives. I am worried I am going to struggle to juggle work, children, hospital appointments etc as I so want to be strong for my children. The added pressure of being a single mum is huge as it is without throwing an illness in the mix.

My doctor has a plan and is positive it is treatable. Chemo, CT Scan to stage it, then surgery once the chemo has done it's thing. 

I have told my children as I believe they need to know and they need to process things and understand what's going on. They took it was better than I thought which was encouraging but I'm fully aware they may not have processed it yet.

I guess I just wanted to write all this down somewhere to hear from people in similar situations.

Thanks for reading,

Vicky.

  • Offline in reply to Vitchy

    Did you find out what type of tumour you had? Receptors etc? Chemo over 12 weeks is a new one - shorter than some are. Did they say why every 2 weeks as opposed to every 3 weeks? Good luck with the cold cap. I figure even if you manage to keep 50% and wear the wig during chemo, it’s a head start for growing the rest back after treatment. I know I’ll be eager to get back to work afterwards but not until I have hair. 

  • Offline in reply to RedRuth84

    My children are 10 and 12 so slightly older, or slightly more aware than yours might be. The tumour is (was) 14mm. If you don’t need chemo, do you need to tell them? 

  • Offline in reply to Smudge24

    I'll have to be in hospital for 2 days so I need to tell them something. They've told me because I have small children I will need to stay over night because of the element of reconstruction. 

  • Offline in reply to Smudge24

    It’s a big one! 11cm  I know every 2 weeks sounds a lot. I’ll be just recovering and them bam another one. Still if it gets the job done. Happy days. 

  • Offline in reply to Vitchy

    I think it’s good every two weeks. I’d prefer it. Shorter time but maximum treatment. Just wondered if they gave you that option or just told you that’s the way it was. When do you start? 

  • Offline in reply to RedRuth84

    How did telling your children go? I’m recovering well. Had the outer dressings changed today but no other news. Just again in that waiting zone- eager to get results. 

  • Offline in reply to Smudge24

    Hi. Thanks for checking in. My youngest gave me lots of cuddles. My eldest was quiet and had very little reaction yesterday. But today on the way to school we had tears and lots of questions from the eldest. So I think it's still processing. 

    How long did they say the results take in your area? They've said 4/5 weeks here but usually the results for everything else have come quicker so fingers crossed.  How is your recovery? Are you managing the exercises? How are you coping with things at home? 

  • Offline in reply to RedRuth84

    They said 2 weeks. Hopefully earlier, although I found out today that my nurse has broken her foot so I’ve been allocated to another nurse. It’s a bit annoying as my nurse has been telling me everything once she sees it on the system rather than me having to wait to see doctor. This one might not do that.

    I’m managing totally fine, it’s the resting part I find hard as I’m quite an active person generally so want to get busy all the time. 

    I’m pleased it went well telling the kids. Good luck for Wednesday. 

  • Offline in reply to Smudge24

    Start on Wednesday. Picc line fitting  tomorrow . Hopefully bloods will be ok. Hope you get some positive news soon. I’m hoping life will be pretty normal apart from the tiredness, sickness, diarrhoea, loss of hair ( so probably not normal life) . Went to m and s and bought loads of treats for myself today. 

  • Offline in reply to Smudge24

    Hopefully this new nurse is just as diligent. I never have the same one twice!   Let me know how get on. I will be thinking of you. 

    I am also an active person and a 'do'er' so I don't know how I'll cope either. 

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