Kind of diagnosed?

Hi all

I had my appointment at the breast clinic yesterday and had biopsies taken (which I didn't enjoy at all!!) but both the consultant radiographer and surgeon told me that despite not having the biopsy results they are pretty sure we are dealing with breast cancer. I kind of expected this outcome as I've had cysts before and this felt VERY different, but a little part of my brain is thinking hmm the results might be negative? My husband is more of a realist than me and he says the specialists will see this day in day out and he just doesn't think they'd tell me they think it's cancer without being pretty sure. Also I have two friends who were told the same in their appointments and they went on to have a formal diagnosis. 

I don't really know what I'm asking in this post...maybe I just feel the need to speak to people who understand what it's like to have that little spark of denial...

  • Hello SharLou, first of all, let me say how sorry I am for what you are going through.  Five years ago I was diagnosed with breast cancer, and even though I kind of knew what the results were going to reveal, it still came as a huge shock.  I don't think that anything really prepares you for it.  I agree with your husband:  The specialists would not have told you that they believe it is breast cancer unless they were absolutely sure.  It is absolutely normal to be in denial.  We all like to believe that maybe there has been some terrible mistake, and maybe the specialists are wrong. I know exactly how you feel.......there is a sense of unreality about it all.  It's like you are having a bad dream, and any moment you think you will wake up from it.  Don't be afraid to reach out for support.....from family, from friends, and also from the people here on this forum.  Good luck to you, and once again, I am so sorry for what you are going through, but please remember, where there is life there is hope.  xx

  • Thank you so much for your reply.  Unreality is a good way of describing it! In a bizarre way I always knew I'd have that conversation one day, I lost my mother to breast cancer when she was only 38 (I was 9) so I think I've always thought I'd get it one day.  So when I actually sat there and the consultant said they were pretty sure that's what we're up against, I just said OK! I think he was waiting for the questions etc but I just sat there like an idiot. And then afterwards...it just didn't seem real at all.  Very surreal experience and I haven't reacted at all like I thought I would. I suppose none of us know how we will react until we're in that moment.  Anyway thank you for reaching out and I hope you are doing ok? xx

  • Offline in reply to SharLou

    Sharlou 

    I was told mine was like it to be breast cancer like you thought no way this can be happening part of me thought they are wrong 

    week after biopsy confirmed breast cancer 

    good luck lovely 

  • Hi Sharlou, 

    Im so sorry to hear about your possible diagnosis. I just wanted to ask what your lump felt like, as you say it felt different to cysts you’ve had before? X

  • Offline in reply to Sofie19

    Hi Sofie,

    With the cyst, it was like a pea shape and I could move it slightly when I applied pressure. It also gave me like a 'pulling' feeling. With the cancer lump, it was fixed, not tender at all and felt like a marble under the skin. It also caused a dimple. That said, all lumps can cause the same symptoms so please don't think that what I have described means bad news. Are you waiting for news? X

  • Offline in reply to SharLou

    Thank you for your reply! 
    urm well, I found a lump but mine is flat with irregular edges, feels fixed to tissue but not completely immobile but then I’ve never felt a lump before so I’ve got nothing to compare it to. I don’t have any pain. I was referred to the breast clinic under the 2 week wait, and after a 10 day wait I went to the appointment and I saw the consultant who told me that they don’t currently have a radiographer so they couldn’t do any investigations and sent me away. Obviously I was/am devastated. The plan now is to wait for an ultrasound appointment but the anxiety is crippling me, so I’ve booked a private appointment xx

  • Offline in reply to Sofie19

    Ah bless you, I honestly think the waiting was the worst bit. The uncertainty is very difficult to deal with. When is your appointment? I can only speak about my experience, which may be very different to others, but as soon as the consultant felt mine he said it would be biopsied. I'm sure you've got lots of people telling you not to worry, which I struggled with to be honest as its almost impossible not to! But the fact remains that more lumps are benign than bad and even if it turns out to be bad, there is so much can be done nowadays xx

  • Offline in reply to SharLou

    My private appointment is on Tuesday, which has made me feel better as it’s very soon. Yes the waiting is torture. Yes, everyone has said, you’re young, I’m sure it’s fine. Difficult to hear when I’m convinced of the worse case. I mean, the worst case for me isn’t even cancer, it’s incurable cancer that scares me more than anything. That probably sounds a bit strange, but that’s how my head has rationalised it. I’ve prepared for the worst, but I’m hopeful for the best xx

  • I know exactly what you mean, I lost my mam to cancer when she was only 38 so it's instantly where my brain goes. I'll keep everything crossed that it's good news on Tuesday xx

  • Offline in reply to SharLou

    Sharlou 

    how did you get on any results on biopsy yet ? Xx