Hi. My partner started flot on Wednesday. Last night he had a really bad night. Sickness and diarrhoea. He said he feels weird. Like floaty. He said his throat feels bruised. I thought side effects would have gone by now. 

Hi Steve, I hope your well :) 

I just wanted to reach out to get some more advice as we now have a clearer picture with dad. 
All scans are completed and CT and PET scan show it has not spread. Dad will be having the operation and had his fitness test yesterday and passed it. He does need to have some chemo before the operation to kill any cells so hopefully within next few weeks and then the operation and maybe some chemo after. We are remaining positive that it hasn’t spread and can have the operation. I just know it will be a tough 6-8 months now. Just a little worried about dad starting the chemo and what I can do to help him and mum manage? My dad’s journey seems similar to yours doesn’t it with chemo operation and then chemo at the end. 

thank you 

Leanne 

Hi Leanne.

I'm glad to hear about your dad's results even though the situation is what it is in one respect.
On the other, the news based on my journey is good - being able to look back.

I presume your dad's having FLOT. 4 cycles every 15 days.
Chemotherapy is never pleasant and there are side effects of course but if dad's fit healthy and eating what he can with a varied diet. (All being good the FLOT should shrink the tumour slightly before surgery)
He may tolerate the rounds quite well.  
Of course everyone is different with this.
Keep on top of the nausea with the tablets it really helps.
Sometimes he may not want to eat but I found forcing myself to helps and drink lots of fluids - even if only sips of fluid and mouthfuls of food. .
He will have his bouts of sickness diarrhoea lethargy plus etc days when he wonders what it's all about.
There will be tears and anger sometimes for no apparent reason ups and downs along the way.
For you and your mum it will be hard too. At times you may despair.

I told my partner no kids gloves attitude if I needed a rollocking, give it to me.
At times softly softly too, your dad's head, as well as yours and your mums, will go place's you never wanted to go.
You of course will assess each situation you know your dad.
My advice would be to never stop talking to each other to be strong for dad and each other.

For you and mum live a normal a life as you can - be sure to take time out.

When you want to cry CRY
When you want to shout SHOUT.
Remember your biggest support network is your family and friends. Use it / them.
There of course is other support out there, take and use it as you need.
Please tell your dad from me to be strong, on the bad days just accept it's a bad day, there will be better ones around the corner.  Talk when he needs to. And get out every time he can, whether a short walk around the block with you or your mum, a quick drink (0% alcohol :)) in the pub, an evening with friends whatever it is that is as normal as possible in this un-normal times. 

There is a light at the end of the tunnel it's 10 months out of your life - he can do this.

And my partner might well want to warn you about the flatulence and belching and hiccups.   

Hope this helps.
Best wishes 
Steve 

Hi Steve, 

so sorry for the delay response! This message was amazing and I’ve shown my dad and it has given him such comfort before his treatment of chemo on Monday! I really appreciate all your support and advice! Your journey seems like my dad’s so far! My dad is having Ivor Lewis surgery but this is the stomach not the oseophagus. Which surgery did you have? Thank you again for everything! 
Leanne 

Hi Leanne.

Glad to help and hope it gave you and dad some insight.

My op was Ivor Lewis involving oseophagus and stomach.

Wish you all well and best wishes on yours and dad's journey.

Chins up and stay positive.

Happy to help.

Steve

Hi Steve, 

hope your well? Just sending a message to let you know where we are at with dad’s journey and anymore advice would be greatly appreciated. Dad has had the operation and is now recovering at home. He has been recovering at home for about 13 days. He is starting to struggle with tiredness and constipated. Also elements of frustration and feeling a little low which is understandable but we are remaining strong and telling dad there is light at the end of the tunnel. Is it normal to have these up and down days? He has been out for a walk but is feeling really tired and not much appetite. We have a follow up meeting with the doctor next week. I think what I’m asking is that it does get easier right? Everyday he will get stronger and some days will be harder than others but at least he could have the operation and is still with us. 

thank you 

Leanne 

Hi Steve, 

thank you so much for this message it has given us reassurance and comfort. Each day will get better and it makes me feel so much better. Is it possible to take your number if you message me privately please with it and I can give it dad to message you. 

Leanne