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I’m in denial about my cancer diagnosis, It feels like an out of body experience. Has anyone else felt like this?

claris441
Offline

Morning 

I was called for a routine appointment for my breasts. I got a letter asking me to go back because they were a mass that needed further investigation. I was then diagnosed with invasive ductal carcinoma stage 3. I’ve since had the lumpectomy and lymph node biopsies for which I will get the results on Thursday. Is it still odd that I still don’t think I have cancer and that it almost feels like an out of body experience. It’s only because I can see my scars that I know I’ve had something done. I have been signed off work since my diagnosis as I had to come off my HRT and I was a complete **** before I found the right dosage. I would have outbursts or randomly cry. So I’ve had my antidepressants increased but my mind still keeps going dark but I’m not sure if that’s because I haven’t accepted my diagnosis.

any suggestions are appreciated 

thank you

  • Offline in reply to Sandradee

    Hi Sandradee

    I’m so sorry to hear that it took so long for the professionals you saw to listen to you. I think you’re entitled to feel really angry. I haven’t told many people yet about having breast cancer. Not even all my family know. I want to get further on in my treatment before more loved ones know. In some ways that’s just the way I want to cope with what’s going on. Because you kept going back to tell plenty of professionals about your concerns, I hope you know how determined you’ve been. I’m betting that you’ll carry on with life the best way you can!

    You’re one tough cookie Sandradee!

    Hang in there

    X

  • Offline in reply to Jstaves

    Thank you. Like you I want to leave it to the last minute before I tell anyone to spare their pain. I have always been a private person and don’t let my guard down very easily.

    Best wishes 

  • Offline in reply to Sandradee

    You’re welcome ….

    Sparing loved ones pain is what Mums do …..

    I’m a very private person too…

    Take care

    X

  • Offline in reply to Henri

    Hi again Henry 

    I hope you’re OK. I woke up to bird song this morning and will be searching for moments of inner calm today.

    Take care

    X

  • Offline

    Hey Claris, 

    I'm deeply sorry to hear about your diagnosis and the challenges you're facing. It's completely normal to feel disconnected from the reality of a cancer diagnosis, especially when processing such overwhelming emotions. Your experience of feeling like it's almost an out-of-body experience is valid and understandable. Coping with cancer can be an incredibly complex and emotional journey.

    It's important to give yourself time and space to process your feelings and emotions, and to seek support from loved ones, healthcare professionals, or support groups who can provide understanding and guidance. It's also positive that you're taking steps to address your mental health by adjusting your antidepressant dosage. Remember, everyone's journey is unique, and there's no right or wrong way to feel or cope with a cancer diagnosis.

    Wishing you strength, courage, and healing. 

  • Offline in reply to elena_s

    Thank you for sharing your experiences. I don’t feel so alone with skin cancer. I now have no joy in going out anymore and get depressed. It has been a complete shock. I too feel disconnected and it will take time to adjust to. Thank you for being brave and sharing. 

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