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I’m in denial about my cancer diagnosis, It feels like an out of body experience. Has anyone else felt like this?

claris441
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Morning 

I was called for a routine appointment for my breasts. I got a letter asking me to go back because they were a mass that needed further investigation. I was then diagnosed with invasive ductal carcinoma stage 3. I’ve since had the lumpectomy and lymph node biopsies for which I will get the results on Thursday. Is it still odd that I still don’t think I have cancer and that it almost feels like an out of body experience. It’s only because I can see my scars that I know I’ve had something done. I have been signed off work since my diagnosis as I had to come off my HRT and I was a complete **** before I found the right dosage. I would have outbursts or randomly cry. So I’ve had my antidepressants increased but my mind still keeps going dark but I’m not sure if that’s because I haven’t accepted my diagnosis.

any suggestions are appreciated 

thank you

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    Hi Claris,

    Nothing about the cancer experience is normal - it affects everyone in different ways and at different times.
    Denial can be your mind’s way of protecting itself - letting the realisation sink in at a speed it can cope with.
    Some people say we patients go through a grieving process - similar to the way we cope with a bereavement.

    Denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance are stages traditionally described and most of us go through these at some time - sometimes more than one at once.

    Sometimes early acceptance can be confused with denial - just wanting to get on with treatment without fuss.

    I hope your treatment goes well.

    Best wishes
    Dave

  • Offline in reply to davek

    Hi Dave

    Oddy enough that makes sense. However I can’t say I’ve been angry just frustrated as I was meant to have surgery in feb so that I could then get my knees replaced and that bothered me more than the diagnosis. I understand why it took a sidestep it’s just something, like everyone else who has had a diagnosis, I wasn’t expecting it.

    hopefully my further treatment/s will be straight forward. However I am also taking one day at a time as my brain likes to throw me the occasional curveball.

    Thank you for your response it is very much appreciated,

    Claire

  • Offline in reply to claris441

    Claire 

    I totally ignored my breast cancer diagnosis flew through it sort of blanked it that was July 22 

    sonce then I have been fine totally as I was before so everyone is different don’t panic of how you are meant to feel just take it one day at a time 

    I’m having issues now 2 years on with the blocker tanoxifen now they are driving me crazy the side effects these are worst than the cancer to me xxx 

    good luck love Lara x

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  • Offline in reply to claris441

    Claire 

    I totally ignored my breast cancer diagnosis flew through it sort of blanked it that was July 22 

    sonce then I have been fine totally as I was before so everyone is different don’t panic of how you are meant to feel just take it one day at a time 

    I’m having issues now 2 years on with the blocker tanoxifen now they are driving me crazy the side effects these are worst than the cancer to me xxx 

    good luck love Lara x

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