Hi billy , it's what person who did the ultra sound said. 
Bless you Billy you are really going through the ringer and yet you are on here being so supportive to people .

I am on the phone now trying to get a GP appointment . I feel like a massive attention seeker especially with everything you have going on 

thank you xx 

You're jumping waaaaay ahead before even the doctors know, so that 12% survival figure is currently doing you no good. Also remember, almost all information out there is at least 5 years out of date. It's how these figures are done. After all, if we think about it logically, they can't give a 5 year survival percentage on something only done last year. That would require another 4 years at least.

My wife got a treatment that was only introduced last year, so your treatment could involve something that those current 5 year statistics don't include. Another part of her treatment involved the actual op. By all intents and purposes, she should have and would have required a full mastectomy. But she ended up with a lumpectomy all because the surgeon treating her had devised a new procedure, that is proven to be every bit as successful as having the entire thing removed.  This might all be irrelevant as you may be stage 3.  We all have horrid gut feelings. I went through a massive cancer scare about 15+ years ago (blood cancer). I had a gut feeling it was bad. After all, bloods don't lie. but once every proper test was back, it wasn't what my gut was telling me. When scared we gravitate towards the worst case scenario. We all do it at some stage or another. That's part of the unknown stage when faced with a cancer diagnosis or potential diagnosis.

So I went to the doctor and he can't prescribe the medication you suggested as I have asthma... 

I saw the look on  his facecwhen he saw how large the tumour is. 

 Very shocked and understood why I didn't feel it as u def fatty tissue I was unaware of thickening of the skin... 
I really do have a gut feeling it's spread 

its massive compared to other Brest cancers 

I don't hope to be stage 4 it would help me cope if I know I am... I want  to be cancer free 

I want this thing gone from my body 

i want to stop having nightmares I am in a coffin 

I want my partner and daughter to know I will be with them for the next 30 years 

this thing has ripped my world apart 

I am so happy you and your wonderful wife beat this... it's awful  that you both went through it but how amazing you made it through ... 

i

Todays cancer journal not  too bad only had one major meltdown,got some  advice  and support from my aunt and my friend …. Phoned to postpone the wedding reception , explained why and was offered a shoulder to cry on and told to ring anytime by the manager who has been in exactly the same place as me with breast cancer but has survived… Went to the doctors and couldn’t speak when the receptionist asked me what I was in the see the doctor for , so she asked me if I wanted to write it down so I did that I was there about my new diagnosis , she was amazing and signed me up to a support group …  One major meltdown Thank you everyone . Xx

That's really good. It's all you can do, take each day as it comes. As bad as you thought you were yesterday, you were a lot calmer than you were when you began this thread. Talking seems to calm you, like it does with my wife.

So you know what works, talking. If you need to talk on here, and it seems no one is responding, it's usually just because the people who normally respond aren't around. So never think people are ignoring you. It's your thread so just talk away even if it seems you're talking to no one. Someone will come along and talk to you at some point. Keep up the chats with your friends and family because it does help massively. You will have more wobbles, so don't feel ashamed when they come. You aren't attention seeking or being neurotic as you have claimed throughout this thread, you're just needing to talk and it's understandable. Everyone here can relate to your need to talk.

But still, stay off google. That will be helping you too. Reading google is what got you into the state you were 2 days ago. You can't possibly read anything that will calm you down. Quite the opposite.

I also telephoned McMillan as well I hope I have another good day tomorrow, I am really trying and did stay away from google, my aunt advjcec reading survival stories ... I will but maybe not just yet incase it leads me to search for something silly again.. xx

i will talk on this thread it does help... 

Just a thought have a read about, [@mare]‍ or hoping she will pop on. 

Billy 

[@mare]‍ already posted today Billy. And what an uplifting post it is! 

www.cancerresearchuk.org/.../eleven-years-living-with-metastatic-breast-cancer-today

Hi Justathena.   Please don't feel that you are 'attention seeking' or being 'neurotic' because all of us on here have walked in your shoes.  Some of us have had cancer in the past, some of us still have it, and some of us are caring for loved ones who have this disease.  ProfBaw is absolutely right about staying off google..........you end up believing that you have got every illness under the sun.  There's no shame in being frightened........it's what makes us human.  When I first joined this forum, I was at a very low ebb, but there are some very kind folks on here, and it is a cliche, but so very true:  A Problem Shared Is A Problem Halved.  Take care mate, Violet, x