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Terrified and scared

Justathena
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Hi I heard the nurse wrong ,I thought she said I had stage three breast cancer , ok I thought I have a heck of a battle but my chances of survival are really quiet good .. when I telephoned my nurse all excited saying I had read some very good things about treatment my world imploded  she said no it's not stage 3 if fast growing and has spread into several of your lymph nodes is

it is a grade 3 tumour that I now understand through reading lots of articles on line mean I have in incurable an er and probably have two years to live... I am so sad... I wanted to see the world 

 

  • Offline in reply to ProfBaw

    Lol no wt. ha be the typo it is funny... my mister is from Glasgow ... he is not dealing with the news that great he is trying but I don't think I am helping 

  • Offline in reply to Justathena

    Now, that is something i can talk about from a position of personal experience. You just concentrate on how you're dealing with things, and don't add more pressure onto yourself thinking you have to deal with someone else's emotions too. As selfish as it sounds (and it isn't), it's currently about you. There are people out there for your partner to talk too (Maggies, Macmillan etc), so don't overthink that aspect of things. You come first and there is no right or wrong way how you deal with this God awful wait. Other than keeping off Google of course. That is the only wrong thing you can do. lol.

    But yeah, never underplay what you're currently going through. It will be one of the toughest parts mentally through this journey. Things do settle down once you have a treatment plan in place, and once you know the unknown. Won't lie, you will still have your wobbles, but they do become less of a burden on yourself. We still have our *** days, but you soon realise it's wasted energy and can become all consuming.

    We were exactly in your position a few months ago, but now we laugh a lot more and she even jokes about her cancer at times. As dark as it sounds, once things settle, one of the most important things to keep during all this is your sense of humour. It will creep back in.

  • Offline in reply to Justathena

    Alot of times friends and family of someone who has cancer can take it as bad or worse than the person with cancer, remember they know about it but cannot do anything about it where you can get treatment  

    I've always called mine my uninvited guest, we go everywhere together. Alot of people have a name for it some rather rude, some laughable. Hope you can think of something. 

    Billy xx 

  • Offline in reply to ProfBaw

    I am freaking out again...., god this awful I want to cry... havnt even been on google... 

  • Offline in reply to Billygoatt

    Billy I am freaking out again... I was ok then 5 minuets ago I went into a meltdown.... I am going insane ... xx 

  • Offline in reply to Justathena

    Relax please go to hubby for a cuddle and cry your eyes out its what you need just now let the stress go to hell. Ok 

    X

  • Offline in reply to Justathena

    As Billy said, use your husband for cuddles. That and listening to our partners is all we can do, so give yourself a breather and just go with the flow.

    Sometimes a wee walk is good for clearing the head when things get bad. Me and my partner went for a lot of wee walks. We are lucky we stay right on the shorefront, so the sea breeze helped us too.

    You will get these episodes, then once you come down from them, you'll wonder what all that was about considering you were doing well moments before. It does come in waves.

    Tomorrow, I would try calling Macmillans. They are second to none speaking you through the initial stage. I'll see if my wife will come on and speak to you as she's also on here.I'm nipping on here regularly as i know you're in a state. However, you are doing better then you were whether you realise it or not. Your general mood is better than it initially was. That is a good thing as it means you're managing some of the stress better. But we're here if you're wanting to talk, rant or just vent.

  • Offline in reply to ProfBaw

    Thank you if your wife wouldn't mind helping me ... I willl  e most grateful to you both .... I am so used to being in control 

  • Offline in reply to Billygoatt

    We are going for a walk billy cx 

  • Online in reply to Justathena

    Hello Justathena, 

    I am so pleased to see you have received so many supportive messages from many of our community members and that you are all getting on so well and having such interesting conversations on this thread. 

    I thought I would just mention that if you ever had any questions or simply wanted to talk things through with one of our cancer nurses, you are welcome to give them a call on this free number 0808 800 4040 - their line is open Monday to Friday from 9am to 5pm. 

    Best wishes, 

    Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator

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