return to work chaos

Hi, just need to winge a bit.  Been off work since November. I do support work for uni students with a range of disabilities, physical and learning differences.  My job relies on the individuals timetables, and where/when the letures fall, I am normally expected  to flit between campus near home, or three possiblole sites in town, or two on nearby riverbank. I do not own a car, although my late dad bought us one, my husabnd uses it for his job, travelling with kit to do gardening jobs.He will sometimes give me a lift, but cant rely on it.  I rely on buses, but in covid they hav ebeen rerouted and the stop is almost as far away as halfway to work. I am physically disabled with poor mobility, and had to fight to get PIP, and will face a review. I've applied for Access to work for travel help to and from work, and in between sites. But that will take ages to sort out, and Im hoping to be able to work remotely from home when they sort out renewing my laptop. Both my former line managers left when I went off sick, both new ones are off on leave.  And now occ health assessor is promoting idea of a phased return to work, starting 3 hours a day, then four on alternate days, or something equally complicated which is totally incompatible with the nature of what I do, I can hardly say, oops, sorry i have to finish now mid way through a four hour slot and push off home. Also, I used to opt to pick "slots" allowing myself a day and a half not at work, so that i could attend for my blood tests and clinic visits, to manage my other helath problem. and if free I could get involved in recrutiting students onto some of the couurses in my second job at the uni.  Its not just that occ health suggestions dont reallyu seem to fit the how I do what i do bit of my life, m the lucky winner of an autoimmune disease which put me in the shielding group. and dont feel safe on buses, tried it once recently and nobody was folloiwng distancing or mask rules.  I love what i do, Id been medically retired 15 years ago, and fought to get back into meaningul work. the idea of being stuck at home as a domestic fills me with terror. Im fed up that husband returns from work in his grubby work clothes, announces he is tired,not even noticing that I get tired, partly due to the drug regime Im stuck on to manage the autoimmune condition, esp the painkillers.  To cap it all, i fell on the stairs last week and broke a bone in a foot Id had rebuilt two years ago. Cant drive, cant walk very far, stuck wearing a boot to keep myu toes non weight bearing - another inconvenience. I knoqw i shouldnt moan, but ye gods, have had enought, 12 weeks official shielding plus other weeks Id done before that, and now this, have now managed home delivery of shopping, but aside from a cleaner I pay for once a week, thats it. drat all help, and now cann ot imagine how I will cope with running the house cook clean manage dog and the veg patch without some sort of backup. sick of feeling that Im a slacker, but physically unable to do very much at all of any use. feeling sad. Would love to hear from anyone else who has got tips about becoming a superjuggler in terms of managing their health and their work life.Id thoguht I was pretty good at it after 15 years of practice, and 6 of holding down two jobs and running a b&b for langauge students, but this has got me beat

  • Hi poland19,

    It certainly sounds like you've got a lot on your plate at the moment - definitely don't beat yourself up at all about this as it sounds like you're doing a great job all things considered.

    In terms of the work logistics, it does sound complicated and difficult. Hopefully things will gradually become more normal or easier with time, for example the buses and your work schedule and various other aspects. Hopefully your employer understands the situation you're in.

    With your home life, perhaps if you haven't already you can try to have a discussion with your husband about both of your work situations, how it's making you feel, and talking about how you could each help each other with various things around the house.

    And if anything less important slips a bit, don't worry and keep cutting yourself enough slack so that you can go about your business and get the essential things sorted without too much added stress. Keep making time to do things that are relaxing and that you enjoy - your own 'me time' - which is important for helping everything else to be possible.

    I hope the foot improves soon and that things can perhaps ease a little for you soon too.

    Wishing you all the best,

    Ben
    Cancer Chat Moderator