Hello Lucky77, 

Don't feel guilty or selfish for feeling sad - it is perfectly normal after everything you have been through. Even though no radiotherapy or chemotherapy was necessary, it was still a very intense experience and many on here can relate to how you are feeling and will tell you that they have also felt the same, the feeling that they should be feeling happy and relieved but that they are unable to shake off this sadness. As you said, you were very busy this summer, had lots of visitors and kept busy and active which is great but it may now be a bit of a contrast as the summer is over and your timetable is no longer filled with hospital and doctor appointments. 

I hope you won't mind but I have slightly changed your title so that it is more specific and your post can therefore be more easily spotted by others who have also had a similar diagnosis and had to face similar decisions regarding reconstruction. Hopefully they will be along soon to share their own experiences with you.  We also have detailed information on breast reconstruction on this page which may be of interest to you. 

Rest assured you are not alone feeling this way and we are all here for you whenever you want to talk to others who find themselves in a similar place.

Best wishes, 

Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator

Hi Lucky77

I had a mastectomy in Feb 2018 after a DCIS lumpectomy and radiation  in 2015.   I did not have any treatment after the mastectomy but failed implant reconstruction because of infection.

I had the summer of 2018 off and took it easy and relaxed,my last op was Sept 2018 because of the infection, and I went back to work in Jan 2019.  Llike you I  was feeling sad even though i was in good health otherwise.  Going back to work helped me feel more positive and gave me my confidence back.  I am now in a better place

I have to decide on DIEP flat reconstruction as this is  the option offerd to me now. 

Don't be so hard on yourself, I too know there are ladies worse off then me but each persons journey is individual to them and how they cope.  

Take you time and be good to yourself

JohannaM

I think once you are out of the system it is easy to feel bereft and down. A lot of us are alive but damaged in various ways .I keep getting potential skin cancers from the radiotherapy so have to keep being biopsied and I have one Dd breast and one small B which makes bras impossible

there are a lot of support groups out there