Hi Sharon,

Congratulations for being clear of three years - that's an achievement in itself.

Your anxiety about cancer returning sounds pretty logical to me. You've had it twice now, so you'd be pretty dumb NOT to be concerned about it in some way.

I guess the problem is that the natural concern is getting in the way of enjoying life. This seems to be fairly common amongst people who have had cancer. Have you discussed this with your GP? There are a number of treatment options available from talking therapies which will help you learn how to set the concern into an appropriate context, or support groups through to medication to take the edge off your anxiety. I'm on the latter - just enough to help me get to sleep at night without tossing and turning wondering whether my own cancer has started growing again. 

The main thing is to stop feeling bad about feeling like a victim. It takes time for the psychological damage to heal and being vigilant might well keep you alive IF it recurs (as it has once already). I think some of the TV campaigns about kicking cancer's *** and the like raise unrealistic expectations of ourselves. This is a scary experience for us all and none of us are super-humans (apart from the psychopaths) with no sense of fear or imagination.

Best wishes
Dave

Hi Sharon, it's understandable that you worry especially as you've been through it twice. My breast cancer was diagnosed and treated a year ago. My fears of it returning get worse as time goes on. Having had my 1st year post op follow up which thankfully is clear at the moment I'm currently feeling more optimistic but I know as the months go by, I will start to worry on a daily ( nightly) basis once again. Sometimes I wish I could just switch off my brain and anxiety so I can sleep better. I never used to be an anxious person and it's a terrible state of affairs. I'm trying to focus on positive events in the future to look forward to...like holidays and meeting up with friends. I'm also trying to expand my social life as I gave up my job during my illness so now feel a bit socially isolated. Keeping myself busy helps me mentally although everyone tells me to slow down.