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feel like a fraud

lonelyone
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I have prostate cancer and i can select to have the op at any time but im scared of the downsides of the op as i already have problems with my bladder  and dont fancy going around with a plastic bag strapped to my side for the rest of my life 

and to be honest the cancer is only but one of my medical problems to many to mention

so my feelings run from scared to feel low  

 

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    Hello Lonelyone, so sorry you are feeling so low and scared.  We all feel like that at times, especially when first diagnosed.  

    Have you seen an oncology team yet?  If so, have you discussed how you feel about having the op?  If your bladder problems were not already existing, it may well be that the prostate is the cause and the op can only make that better.  And, I have to say, why worry about a bag if it means you are still alive?!  I was told when I had my second op for ovarian recurrence that because some of my bowel would have to be removed I might need a colostomy bag - as it happened I did not - but I considered that a small price to pay for my life. 

    Of course, only you can make the decision, we are all different and I suppose my having been a nurse and used to seeing such things has made me a bit more 'laid-back' about them.  (Though I certainly wasn't 'laid-back' about having cancer!)  

    I wish you all the very best.

    Hazel xx

    PS no need to be a 'lonely one', plenty of us on here to lend an ear!

     

  • Offline in reply to haze44

    Hi I have had a pouch for ten years and get on well with it it is all about how  you live your life i have a dog and she walks dad three times a day and looks after me .I eat well and love cooking I was a master butcher for 30 years and love my food .regards george

  • Offline in reply to urostar

    I had a colostomy about 3 weeks ago and I've found it is simply a different way of using the toilet. Still in the healing stage but I don't get what the problem is with having any sort of ostomy.

     

    For me, in the long run, it'll be better.

    Best of luck with your decision,

    Regards

    Taff

  • Offline in reply to Taff

    HI  Taff you speak well has i have said I had my bladder and prostate removed ten years  ago  and life is good I walk RIA 3 or 4 times a day and eat well life is good ,regards george (urostar)

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    I can sympathise with how you feel

    So many people are so frightened of the potential side-effects of the treatment that they suppress their fear of the cancer itself and the prospect of an untimely death.

    Prostate cancer seems to be one of the most awkward ones when it comes to judging for yourself the balance of the risks and benefits of having treatment or doing nothing. 

    I guess you need to talk with your oncologist about the pros and cons of each approach. To be frank you need to know whether or not "the rest of your life" will most probably be considerably longer with treatment than without before you can make an informed choice. 

    My own choice (with a different cancer) in late 2013 was very easy as I was told I had weeks, maybe months, without treatment or months, maybe years, with treatment. 

    Only you can decide, but you need all the information available before can make an informed choice which is right for you.

    Best wishes

    Dave

     

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          Hi Young man what are you up too did you go for the operation I hope you are well and fit as I have said I am 84 and get on with life to the full regards george .

  • Offline in reply to urostar

         are you ok pal  speak to us take care ,george

  • Offline in reply to urostar

        Hi  some time has past talk to us how are you getting on come on now we  can help I hope you are OK  regrads george ,a urostomate /

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