Hi Hazel and Jules. Yes Hazel it was a shame we did not get to the spa but I felt seeing Mark had to come first which my mum understood completely. There's always another day. 

Jules you say your hubby was 6ft 2, well so is Mark and he's tall compared to me. I'm 5 ft 5 which I quite like my height not too small not too tall. I visited him today and he just didn't look right for the get go he was very disorientated and a little bewildered in the sense he was puzzled when I would tell him things as if he hadn't heard it before which in fact it was things I would talk about on a daily basis. I spoke to the nurse and she said no he's fine was very talkative and she didn't see a difference in him. Now every nurse in there is godsent to have they are so nice and caring. But this one  nurse was very dismissive with me when I was asking the questions which I'm sure any worried wife of a dying man would ask and she was giving me the looks and the attitude and I didn't say anything because at the end of they day it was not worth it though I felt like giving her a peace if my mind. I simply took a note and wrote her name down and explained her actions and gave it to the kind lady at the front desk to pass on. 

Just don't understand why she needed to be so insensitive and have this diva attitude. Anyway I'm over it but will check in with the ladies at the front desk to see if anything action was taken. Just for the reason what if she does this with other people as well. 

Hopefully Mark is a bit better tomorrow when I pop in for a while. I told my mother and she said "Oh I would of socked the old bag in the face" can always count on my mum for some laughs lol. Take care all and god bless ,Linda x

Hi Linda, sorry, I replied to your post on 'pictures' before I read this from you.  This nurse may not see a difference in Mark, but YOU are the one who knows him best.  When it's one of your own you can always tell, regardless of what others think.  I can't tell you the number of times I noticed something was 'brewing' with Roy which hadn't been noticed by the care home staff.  What a shame this woman upset you like that, totally unnecessary.  Perhaps you should take your mum with you every time!  

I hope you find him a bit better tomorrow, Linda.

Hugs, Hazel xx

Hi Linda

Such a shame that  your visit to Mark caused you upset when one of the staff members was dismissive. Very surprised that this should be the case and trust that having had a word you will not have to deal with kind of conversation again. 

Unfortunately as both the cancer and the level of medication changed I found it did cause my hubby a bit of disorientation and he was often just too tired to think or react clearly. I often had to tell him what time of day it was and repeat things several times to help him focus on the here and now. Our community/palliative care nurses were luckily quick to explain that this was very often the case and that he did not realise himself that he was struggling.  They also suggestedI using just short simple sentences (as if I was teaching a child) so he had time to process things.Very often it was just a case of sitting quietly for hours by his chair/bed letting him know I was there though he slept a great deal. Many everyday things went on hold as I just made the most of the time we had and the children and grandchildren visited daily which is something he continued to enjoy right up until the last day; amazing how the little ones could still  bring out his smile and a spark of his old sense of humour.

I hope you find Mark comfortable when you visit and a more supportive attitude towards yourself.  Thinking of you both.Jules x

Hi ladies virtues Mark at lunch time and he was pretty much the same though he was very agitated and I needed to let him know I will never let any thing happen to him. Didn't see that nurse today thank goodness. I was told she was warned about her behaviour so hope she has a better attitude. 

Such a horrible day here. I'm just going start the washing and get dinner on to slow cook for later. Take care ,Linda x

Hi Linda,

Had a busy day dodging a few showers but also some lovely sunny spells so had my long walk to the garden centre and was able to plant up my purchases when I got back.

Glad no more problems with the nurse on your visit to see Mark though must be upsetting to see him agitated.  Do you get a chance to chat with his doctor when you visit? Keeping you both in my thoughts.  Jules x

Good afternoon Jules,

Sorry have not replied for a few days. Have spent the last couple of days continuing my late Spring Clean in my garage. I have a rack that twelve inches deep by about three feet wide by seven feet tall that was filled with timber of all sizes and types. Unfortunately it was all covered with a thick layer of dust thats has built up over time. Out of five shelves filled to the brim, I have now whitteld it down to three and a half. Some small pieces  that I would never use I have put in my sons firewood bag while other had defects that needed cutting out, bearing in mind most of this is timber from the bottoms of pallettes.

My September newsletter is now proof read and isready for sending out on the first of the month. We resume meetings next month and the first talk we have is by one of our older members who is also probably our most experianced woodworker. So really looking forward to this. Still have quite a lot of my cob nuts left, which may surprise you amd Mrs B still has plenty of plums left.

So pleased our athletes have done so well. I have said for years, we have some of the best athletes in the world but we have never given then the support and facilities untill the last few years. So pleased for them and all the hard work they have put in. Love your new bird bath, very colourful. On Wednesday, Mrs B wanted to go to a garden centre which turned into two in the morning and another in the afternoon. Incidentally, when we visited the farmshop/ garden centre, they have a section where they have home made cakes ect. There were three lovely big home made treacle tarts whick absolutely made my mouth water. Mrs B saw me looking at them and said, "You cant eat them because your diabetic now, sorry Brian". But I was so tempted, let me tell you Jules. So I bought extra nuts instead so thats why I still have some left ha ha. 

Glad you enjoyed having the young ones overnight and bet they enjoyed themselves too. They must look forward to coming to your place so much. They have so much energy at that age dont they. My sons two cats who normally just about tolerate me, are now my best friends as I am the one feeding them. They are waiting just inside the door and always greet me with a big meow or two or even three and always arrive at their feeding bowls before I get half way there ha ha. Hope you've enjoyed your walk to the market and it hasnt rained.

Well, now I have tidied up my garage, I hope to do some more turning next week where I shall make a mess again. Its a mugs game this woodturng Jules You clean up then go and you go and make a mess again. I am envious of some of our members who have proper dust extraction units.

I wish you and your family a fun filled week; sending best wishes and kind thoughts your way, Brian.

Hi all, I actually was talking with the doctor today who actually was intending to go see Mark. He said he can see a huge difference in him since last time and he's definitely going down hill fast. I said from your experience with patients once they get to this stage of the disease how long do you see them last and he said weeks at most. Sad to hear that but it is the truth. I personally don't think he's got long to go either. He's gotten very thin in the face and lost a lot of weight. 

On my way back home I stopped at the shops and then visited mum who was in the garden with her new plants. Honestly she is never away from the garden centre she may as well live there haha. She made me a cup of tea and we sat in the garden for a while. Her tumble drier is broke so I took some of her stuff to dry in mine. 

Just about to put dinner on and sit back and watch TV. Take care ,Linda x

Hi Brian

Wow, you have been kept busy but I bet the late Spring clean felt good when you had achieved the tidy up. At least now you will have room for the next 'build up' ha ha. When the weather is cool enough you will be busy turning again I am sure as it is obvious you thoroughly enjoy it and I amsure too  that your passion shows through when you put the newsletters together. It takes commitment to be ahead of yourself.  It did remind me of how I really miss my proof-reading job which helped the budget during the years the children were growing up (and something which I did for a media company but was able to do at home for the most part) - those were the days!!  Incredible when I think that all ended in 1998!!

Hope your son and family have had/stillhaving? a lovely break and it sounds as though their cat is your new found friend. Feeding them is a sure fire way of gaining their love and trust!!

It seems as though MrsB has the same feelings for garden centres as I do (and a few others here). These days they offer so much variation in shopping in addition to the plantsand as my local one has a cafe too I use it as a walking target(though sometimes a costly one!!!).

Have just filled the bird feeders again (once a day at the moment as have some very hungry sparrows and goldfinches).  My neighbours have decided to cut down their end of garden trees/shrubs which means the wildlife lose some of their cover (next to my fence border). Once they have finished the work I will have to see if I need to move that feeding station to another area of the garden but hopefully my side of the fence (with shrub and forsythia) will still be enough.  From my lounge I can now see the houses diaganally  for the first time in many years so more light in the garden too .Seems weird at the moment but no doubt will get used to it..

Well had best get on and answer more mail but before I sign off just wanted to let  you know that our old forum friend Kathy had her op earlier this month and is now home recuperating.

Take care and best wishes to you,MrsB and the family.Jules

Hi Linda,

Sad to read your latest update on Mark but it must be good knowing he is being cared for where he wanted to be.  I know you have the support of your Mum and family and my thoughts are with you all.  My hubby did not want to know timings but I found it beneficial to have some guidance though in the end it was quicker than anyone expected.  So hard but  a small comfort knowing he was free of the suffering effects of his illness.

Sending hugs and keeping busy goes some way to coping.  Take care.  Jules x