Oh Jules forgive my post on my site to you .....I am so sorry not to have known of your hubbies departure.  You know from the support you have given me how well I understand your current situation and my heart goes out to you.  My site tells of my joirney through this uncharted place you find yourself in.  It is difficult but you will come through.

All my thoughts and a big virtual hug

Ian x

Hi Ian

Just lovely to see your name appear on my thread and suspect its just as hard for you to post but I really appreciate the message.  It was a long three years for hubby and I take much comfort in the fact that he is now free from the clutches of his disease which took his happiness away.  I am surrounded by the love of my family and friends (and the ongoing support of virtuality buddies) and now, like you, my life must be lived to the best of my ability. Early days still but so many memories to cherish and share with others - a few late nights of 'story-telling' along the way.

Sending hugs and best wishes and hope all is well with you and Julie in your new life.  Jules x

Hi Brian

Am imagining you have been enjoying your nutty bargain.  I love chocolate raisins but having eaten rather too well whilst away need to get back to being 'boringly' good. Have done a healthy shop today and managed to catch up with all the washing (thankfully another lovely day so all dried outside). Also mowed the llawn and planned my last day off tomorrow. I have reward vouchers for our local garden centre so am planning to pop in and have a look around. It is also 10% off day for over sixties. Still need to be kept busy it seems.

It will then be getting back into work routine. It certainly seems quiet after having company for the last few days but am still taking things a day at a time as it seems the right way to cope for me. Have today arranged for hubby's entry into the Book of Remembrance and have made a donation in his memory  to the Garden Memorial Scheme which supplies bulbs and plants for the grounds. It is such a peaceful place to visit and the gardens are beautiful.

Glad  you have been able to get back to woodturning.  I went to several craft fairs (small village affairs) during the holiday and came home with a woodcarving which includes two mice!! as something to remember the holiday by  Sounds as though you will be well stocked for your forthcoming Wood Club Fair.  Hope it goes well.  I am working May bank holidays this year.  My next break will be the first week of Wimbledon although I am hoping to have the odd day out before then. Hubby's sister is due to visit mid-May and hope she will be able to visit his final resting place and gain some comfort from being able to do so. We will hear all about the house renovations on the Isle of Man too.

Hope you and Mrs B are now fully recoveered from the bug.   How are things going with your Dad and brother in law - stable I hope?

Take care.  Jules x

Hi Jules,
Sorry to see you had a crap day yesterday.  Hope being at work has helped a little.  The feelings just come and little we can do about it honey, just get back up and plod on.
Glad you had a lovely break away and the weather was kind to you.  Please let me know what you think of the Amanda Hart book.
I ended up at the kids yesterday to babysit while DIL had a job interview, so that was an unexpected bonus for me.  It meant being away all day but managed to get home before dark, but that was my choice as wanted to have a coffee with son after he finished work.
Today the weather is fine so a bit of weeding planned for later. Got to make hay while the sun shines.
Son coming down for a sleepover Friday night before Mother's Day and will spend a chunk of Saturday with me (can feel a list coming on) before going home to prepare for his darling wife's Mother's Day on the Sunday.  Look forward to feeding him up and letting him have a lie in.  He has requested Apple crumble without the fruit!!
Ok honey will sign off and get moving.
Sending you big hugs
Love Kathy xxxx
 

Hi Kathy,

Thanks for your supportive words. Emotions are normal but sometimes come when not expected.  Had a change of my plans (no problem as it was only garden centre visit) when I picked up an e mail from my daughter letting me know that eldest grandson (6+) was struggling with his understanding/feelings and had a 'sad' day at school (teacher spoke to my daughter at end of day).  This has the obvious affect on us all on how to help him accept that Grandad will 'not be back'. Confusion had set in because of the Easter story and his little head had been dwelling on why Jesus could come back to life and not others.

He did not wat to upset his Mummy because she was already sad (this made her sadder!!) but has talked to his Dad (they are great parents and its a difficult period for us all) and the school is being very supportive. I popped over to keep her and Zack company and we were both a bit teary but its good to have the comfort of each other and being able to talk face to face.

Anyway (lump in throat so onwards and upwards), went back to work and being occupied helps plus I am lucky to have good 'listening ears' there. As you say its an up and down journey but then so is life in general.  On a positive note I chatted (by text) yesterday evening and the school had reported a good day for my grandson and they had included in class talk time about how to remember people/pets when they died and different ways of remembering including making a memory box. This is a project that I am sure will be helpful so we will see if it helps.  Strange really as when I popped round to my daughter initially I had taken a 'lapel pin' of hubby's (from a surprise trip we had been treated to on Concorde) for her to give to him as a 'memory link to Grandad' - he loved it.  Mutual love, respect and support of all concerned is the way to go.

Well that one was one hell of a ramble sorry!!!

Do hope you have a lovely Mothers' Day get together with your son (bet he gets his foodie wish too) and I can almost taste the crumble (I like extra topping too) yummy. All these special times are like a rock to cling to aren't they. 

Good that you are still able to get into the garden when the weather is okay. Beautifully sunny this morning (rainy yesterday) but a bit of a chilly start and the upcoming Bank Holiday weekend looking a bit mixed so no plans (working B/H Monday all day to help out  yuk!) though am getting hair cut tomorrow, catching up with late friend's husband (her year anniversary coming up) and then attending retirement party at Mum's care home (Manager of over 25 years is leaving but will come back on a volunteering basis after a little break) tomorrow afternoon, so hoping Mum in chat mode though thats always a bonus when I visit.  I can take my camera down to show her my holiday shots if she is up to it.

Well time is moving on and I had best clear away breakfast and get some housework done before I leave for work (have a new ironing cover to fit too- how exiting is my life ha ha).  Take care and sending hugs and peaceful thoughts your way.Jules xx

Good morning Jules,

It always tweeks our heartstrings when young people have to try and deal with the loss of a close relative. Your young grandson is obviously a very sensitive and caring young man in that he didnt want to talk to his mother as he knew she was allready upset and he didnt want to make her feel worse. We as individuals can be very good at hiding our emotions to the world but it only takes something like this to show us how vunerable we all are to our emotions. But I feel sure, you as a family will all help each other to cope with situations like this, however upsetting they may be at the time. You can take comfort that you can all talk to each other, and that your grandson Is going to grow up to be a fine young man.

After a bad day in the garage where everything I touched went wrong including my low voltage ligting transformer I use on my lath, Yesterday was okay and I have turned three wooden pigs to add to my collection. Photo attached. I now plan to try to turn some wooden otters and beavers. Its funny, you think you know what they look like until you try to draw, carve or turn them. I have search the internet for photos but most showed both of these animals in the water with just part of their heads showing. It took me quite some while before I could find photos that showed what they look like out of water. So will be trying to add them to my collection in readiness for our show.

Thanks for asking about my dad and brother in law. Dad is okay but tires very quickly which is undestandable and has got a bit hard of hearing too. Brother in law is keeping reasonably well allthough he diid overdo things in the garden last week and fell over, scaring my poor sister in law. Its hard when he has always been used to doing thing and now to find he cant do things without help. As for me and Mrs B we still cant shift this tickly throat/cough we have been left with, even though she had a course of antibiotics. My grandaughter is supposed to be competing for the Sussex team this weekend at archery so will be keeping fingers croosed for her.

Well I had better get out to my garage Jules, Take care of yourself, sending big hugs your way, Brian.

Hi Kathy,

Just to advise you when I went shopping on Tuesday, They still had my cheese buiscuits on offer at half price so have in creased my stock once again. I also went past the nut shop last weekend, well I lied I was going past when my legs took control and next thing I was in the shop. I bought a bag of chocolate peanuts and one of chocolate raisons and when I went to pay for them, the lady said, dont you want the othe bag as they are buy two get the third one free. I havent moved so fast since payday and was back with the third bag before she had finished speaking. So I now well stocked up.

Why is it you always make my mouth water when you talk about what you are going to cook??????????? I think you do this deliberately Kathy just to get me going, and you suceed. Incidentally, there is a timber called Lime, which when it is sanded and it gets a little warm, spells just like fresh baked bread. It always makes me feel so hungrey. Hope you enjoy your sons visit.

Take care, best wishes and hugs, Brian.

Hi Brian

The pigs are great and with all your plans for further animals you will have an 'ark full' in time for the Fair. I bet it was very frustrating when things were not going right but glad all resolved now though am sure  you could 'play on it' a bit and get Mrs B cooking you some favourite munchies though perhaps with extra special offer  cheese biscuits and nut offers you are probably still well stocked..  I have just finished off lunch with a few peppermint creams - very naughty but enjoyed them!

Good day at work today and busy so time went quickly. Also my friend has  managed to book a day out to Tewkesbury soon so nice to have that to look forward to. I am indeed fortunate to have children/grandchildren close by and by supporting each other know we will 'manage' the sad times and come through them together. Still very grateful that I can share my thoughts/feelings on the forum and the 'walls may have ears' as the saying goes but they cannot answer back ha ha.

I know what you mean about that tickly cough (still have mine even though the cold cleared up several weeks ago) and am beginning to think it may be a bit of hay fever though have not suffered from it in the past.  Hope you both lose it soon as its very annoying.  Your Dad is doing amazingly well and glad that the brother in law is coping fairly well just now but can imagine both his wife and yours being a little flustered when things knock him back. I know my hubby found it so hard not being able to do what he wanted when the illness took hold.  Hoping that they can keep him comfortable in the longer term and that he will slowly adjust to taking things a little slower.

Seding you kind thoughts for the weekend ahead and chat again soon. Jules x

Hi Jules ...... been trying to read thru and catch up with how you are.  Your holiday sounds lovely and I am glad you got away for a few days. I also see some sad times and how your little grandson has been feeling - how wonderful that his school is acknowledging that and trying to assist!  Something else drew my eye. -  chocolate raisins!  I love them and will no doubt have to buy some tomorrow now the thought has been planted.

Thank you for popping up to say Hi to me now and then Jules.  Sorry I don't always get back quickly but life is a little "fits and starts"   - chemo, sit on loo and sleep for around 9 days, then normality.  Haha, reading that, I don't fall asleep on the actual loo!   So I'm here lots then disappear for a while.  Anyway glad of a quick catch up and lovely to read what you are up to.  Brian and Kathy are still talking about eating I see hahaha.  Much love to all x

Great to see your post and hope the chocolate raisins are the first item on the shopping list. Despite it all there you are thinking of others and 'coping' with a sense of humour thrown in. There are not enough adjectives to let you know how inspirational you remain (are you blushing?) and know you have the wonderful support of family as you dip in and out of normality.  Now for some toilet humour (sorry) - its about time loo roll was on prescription.  Its no laughing matter but know that 'humour' has to be there as a coping mechanism.

As a family we have been so very lucky to have support in all areas and having lost my 'wife' status my children are getting used to me worrying about them, worrying about me! vicious circle comes to mind. Am so very impressed with grandson's teacher/school and am sure many in his class will have found the 'circle time' chat reassuring though, as they say, Rome was not built in a day. My daughter and grandson are taking part in the Race for Life in June (she has done it several times but this will be his first) and its always emotional event. Am thinking I will be doing a lot of deep breathing exercises as I go along as support (picnic will be full of comfort food I think!!).  Thankfully we have no problem talking through our vulnerabilities/grief/feelings(well talking in general really) but then none of my forum buddies will be surprised to hear it.

Finally, I can hear the sigh of relief, no matter how often (or not) you manage to post, please know that I am keeping you and your family in my thoughts along with so many others going through their own journey. Despite the loss of personal messaging I still feel I have a very large virtual family whose mutual help is much appreciated.  Sending big hugs.Jules xx

Ah, thank you Jules - I dont look too inspirational when sitting on the loo with my book haha!  And toilet paper by prescription, now there is something to mention to my lovely GP!  I would love to sponsor your grandson for the RFL - do you know how to send a link (I havent a clue!). Regarding PMing - I have left you a message on that thread if you would like to take a peak x

Good morning Jules,

I dont think I have ever been to Tewkesbury. I am sure you will enjoy your day out there with your friend. I also hope you enjoy your usual Friday night out. We all need a change of ruotine every now and then.

I have searched the internet and have managed to fing photos of beavers, otters and badgers and even Foxs. I have orderded up a small pen sized blow torch which uses lighter fuel. Once I have turned the badger in some white coloured wood, I will heavily wire brush it to give it the textured look and will then use the blow lamp to lightly singe the black areas before spraying it with an acrylic laquer to seal it. I find it pays to spend time working out  how to do things before hand.

If Max reads this, I am sitting in my chair eating my chocolate raisins. With regard to talking about eating Max, Its Kathys fault for she keeps on about her cooking and always make my mouth water. So I try to get my owm back every now and then. You can see what poor Mrs B has to put up with; I can be a right wind up merchant at times, just like my dad. I have inherited a lot of his good points but also a lot of his bad points as well, ha ha.

Sorry to read you are working on Bank Holiday Monday Jules. I know when I worked at Jewsons I always ended up working extra hours at holiday times. Have now started to pack things up ready for our show. I hope we get some more new members as we could do with boosting our membership up. One of the good things about our craft shows is seeing the young children looking at the work on display. I have been asked some very inteliugent questions by quite young children. With so many good and toys being made of plastic and wood fibres, it is great for them to see what a versatile product wood is. In the early days of our wood club, I was asked to give a talk about how a tree grows and the uses that wood and it by products are used for. The list was quite extensive and surprised many of our members. For instance 80% of rayon used to come from wood fibres. With all the medicines that we get from trees and shrubs, we would all be the poorer if we lose our tree cover.

Sorry, when I get talking about timber I do ramble on (and on and on)

I wish you and Max a peacful weekend, sending big hugs your way, Brian

Good morning Jules,

I dont think I have ever been to Tewkesbury. I am sure you will enjoy your day out there with your friend. I also hope you enjoy your usual Friday night out. We all need a change of ruotine every now and then.

I have searched the internet and have managed to fing photos of beavers, otters and badgers and even Foxs. I have orderded up a small pen sized blow torch which uses lighter fuel. Once I have turned the badger in some white coloured wood, I will heavily wire brush it to give it the textured look and will then use the blow lamp to lightly singe the black areas before spraying it with an acrylic laquer to seal it. I find it pays to spend time working out  how to do things before hand.

If Max reads this, I am sitting in my chair eating my chocolate raisins. With regard to talking about eating Max, Its Kathys fault for she keeps on about her cooking and always make my mouth water. So I try to get my owm back every now and then. You can see what poor Mrs B has to put up with; I can be a right wind up merchant at times, just like my dad. I have inherited a lot of his good points but also a lot of his bad points as well, ha ha.

Sorry to read you are working on Bank Holiday Monday Jules. I know when I worked at Jewsons I always ended up working extra hours at holiday times. Have now started to pack things up ready for our show. I hope we get some more new members as we could do with boosting our membership up. One of the good things about our craft shows is seeing the young children looking at the work on display. I have been asked some very inteliugent questions by quite young children. With so many good and toys being made of plastic and wood fibres, it is great for them to see what a versatile product wood is. In the early days of our wood club, I was asked to give a talk about how a tree grows and the uses that wood and it by products are used for. The list was quite extensive and surprised many of our members. For instance 80% of rayon used to come from wood fibres. With all the medicines that we get from trees and shrubs, we would all be the poorer if we lose our tree cover.

Sorry, when I get talking about timber I do ramble on (and on and on)

I wish you and Max a peacful weekend, sending big hugs your way, Brian

Cmon guys play fair,
Brian and I are not obsessed with eating (not all the time). I do prattle on about the garden occasionally and he does things with trees.... eh ....wood
K x
 

Hi Brian ..... I must admit Kathy's mention of cheese scones does make me buy some now and again - I have never attempted to bake them as cooking is something I do as a 'must do' rather than for a pleasure. I shall be buying some chocolate raisins when hubby gets home and I can get a lift to the shop - cant wait to get my licence back! (I hope I will!). 

Jewsons was a huge employer in Lowestoft when I was young - so that name was blast from the past. Poor Mrs B - she has a lot to put up with if she also has to listen to the versatility of wood conversations haha!  The lady is a Saint!  A Saint who loves you though, there is no doubt about that x

Hey Max, do you think Brian should form a splinter group or is he branching out?  
Do you think he has twigged? You wooden know it.
Sorry must be a full moon approaching.
Kathy xx
 

Hi Kathy,

Thanks for making me laugh. You have a lovely sense of humour. I wish you a peaceful weekend, Brian.

Good morning Brian

Well, my evening out started off okay as we always enjoy a chinwag (and I had missed a week).  No luck for either of us but that is always seen as a bonus.  Sadly though at the end of the session the Manager announced that as from 21st May there would be no more bingo as the site had been sold. We are hoping to go to the 'last hoorah' (a Thursday) and feel so upset for the staff (most been made redundant) and will also now have to think of something else to do as, generally, this is our one night out a week. As my friend will also be moving out of the area (contracts waiting to be exchanged) I need something locally so will be making enquiries to see what's around.

Yesterday was so busy from the off, Appointment for hair early a m followed by a visit to see my late friend's husband (year anniversary looming).  He had lots of family news to catch up on and also has a new lady friend (early days) but was a little more relaxed in general which was good to see.

I then dashed home and grabbed some lunch before going down to see Mum and join in the party for the Manager's retirement.  I was expecting a little afternoon tea but when I arrived all the residents had been moved into the main lounge  and were being entertained by a singer (plus karaoke!).  The first song was t one  we had chosen for hubby's funeral and thus was very emotional for me and half the staff were in tears because Gillian was leaving  and she started me off again with an enormous hug. Everyone is going to miss her caring support.  Her husband does the gardens and she is coming back on a voluntary  basis after a bit of travelling as she says she will miss the residents (but not the day to day stress of running the place!).  One of the residents was celebrating a birthday so had cake and singsong for that and then all visitors/relatives/staff were offered cream tea/wine/tea or coffee/soft drinks/snacks in the dining room for the rest of the afternoon (residents were served in their comfy armchairs too). Mum was her usual non-commital self but was seen to be tapping her feet to the music. It was difficult to  chat with all the hub-bub but will go down  again soon and hopefully take some photos down of the holidays (have ordered prints for the first time in ages as she will prefer to look through an album than see them on the camera!).

Hope your Show goes well and am sure there will be load of interest in all your hard work as well as all the other contributors to the wood club. Fingers crossed you can sign up some 'new blood' too.

Wow, sorry for the long ramble (again).  Will shortly be going out to return a dog toy that my friend left behind yesterday (another unexpected and welcome visitor who lost her Mum  a couple of months ago and is just beginning to feel able to be 'social' again and we are going out for a meal next week which is something for us both to look forward to).

All the best to you and Mrs B and look forward to hearing about the Show in due course.  Jules x

Hi Kathy

Really? not obsessed with eating - why not?!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just to add fuel to the fire - my son's other half has promised me a bundle of rhubarb from their garden when they visit next - yummy - a good excuse for a crumble I think.  In the meantime here is a photo to whet anyone's appetite (pub lunch whilst on holiday!!)drooling Jules xxxx

Oh Jules you are getting as bad as blooming Brian.
What's the green stuff in small round container?  As I haven't had tea guess you are teasing me....  Rhubarb crumble... Yum.
Gosh you have been busy recently.  Your post reminded me of when mate rang tonight and put her radio up full blast, one of hubbys funeral choices was playing, made me smile which was good.  Brings back pleasant memories. 
Am turning into a woose, kitchen thermometer showing 20 degrees and wish the heater was on, will chuck a blanket over knees instead. 
Good to hear mum is doing ok.
Sorry to see your bingo place is closing, it has been a good place for you to visit and if you get a win that's a bonus.
Ok honey, will sign off, wonder if Brian can make crumble for Mrs B with nice warm custard.... Bit of a challenge for him I think.
Lots of love
Kathy xx
 

Hi Jules and Kathy,

I can cook Kathy---------I have a large recipe list -------Toast and Beans on toast , thats if you dont mind the toast incinerated. Mrs B is a good cook so I only cook when it is a matter of some urgency.

Jules like Kathy, I was pleased to read you enjoyed your night out but also sorry to hear the bingo is closing. Have loaded all my bits up for tommorows show and am looking forward to winding my wood club mates up yet again although it will be with a touch of sadness that one of our regular exhibters is no longer with us. I have spent the afternoon on my computer and found I could download a free program from microsoft. I can now do puzzels on my laptop and it also allows me to make a puzzel of any photos I have taken. So have been experimenting with this.

Jules, You have like Kathy got me drooling over the mention of Rhubarb crumble. mmmmnnnn. Max, you are right, I seem to be fixated on food just lately.

I hope you all have a peacefull and relaxing weekend. Take care, hugs to you all, Brian

Hi Kathy

Sorry about the foodie photo but just could not resist getting in on the act haha.  The green stuff was mushy peas (first time I had every had it but apparently very popular!!)  That particular plateful was sitting in front of my son's other  half and I was just intrigued at how they served it (did not last long I can tell you!!).

Had an unplanned shopping trip this  morning as my bingo friend phoned and said she was going to supermarket (cut price out of town) and I went along for the ride (and then shopped for the store cupboard in readiness for family lunch in a couple of weeks) Thought of you when I popped a whole camembert into the trolley.  We dropped my shopping indoors and then went back to their place for tea and angel cake (not very healthy but enjoyable nonetheless). Their daughter and son in law (he is in remission from bone cancer and doing really well just now) popped in  and and then dropped me home (would not hear of me walking though I like the exercise!!).

You are not a wuss re the temperature as you are so used to hot weather, this must feel chilly for you, whereas I have temp of 17 deg in the lounge just now and just need a cardigan(in addition to normal layers I hasten to add). Am sure I would feel like you do in similar circumstances.

Hope your Mum and sisters doing okay now they are settled back at home and bet you are skyping regularly(not something I have).  Take care and chat soon.  Jules x

Thanks for  making me smile Brian with your talk of incinerated toast.  I think this is why my son wanted us to have a toaster (many years ago now!!) as I would 'forget' it under the grill and was forever scraping off the  burnt bits!

Hope all goes well with the Show and am sure your sadly passed member will be keeping an eye on your progress and the Club will do him proud.  It is the 'first time without someone being there' that is a hurdle so many have to climb but know you will have the support of your Club-mates and hope you get a good response both for the hard work/beautiful pieces you have all produced and some new members signed up  in the art of craftsmanship that wood brings.

It's chucking it down with rain here just now  so have delayed going out in the hope it clears up a little later as the forecast has suggested.  If not then housework will have to suffice.  At least the garden is benefitting from a good watering and its quite mild so no heating required.  I bought two lavender plants yesterday and plan to put one in a container near the back patio doors (the other one is currently indoors , thus bringing the garden inside!). I also have a box of wild flower seeds to scatter but am a fair weather gardener so they will have to wait for a better day (no doubt whilst I am working all day tomorrow grrr). Take care and best wishes to you and Mrs B.  Jules x