Hi Pauline,

I'm sorry your feeling low right now. I had cervical cancer with internal radiation so I understand how you feel to a certain extent. The treatment that saves us can feel so invasive and it's normal to cry about it once in a while. Doesn't mean you aren't strong. I think you should do whatever makes you feel the best about yourself, and if that involves reconstruction, find another surgeon. 

Laura xx

Hi Lara. Thanks for you comforting words.    I hope you are on the road to recovery. 

I've been so good at taking one step at a time. And when at pre treatment planning the surgeon said that he did feel reconstruction or shaping was necessary I suppose I thought that there wouldn't be much of a dent. Which to be honest if you look there doesn't appear to be much. But when you touch and feel the area it's so rough and jagged with hard edges. It feels like someone hacked a lump of meat into pieces and left it in place of my breast. 

Hopefully as you say in time it will settle. 

I still have to await results to know if margins and lymph nodes are clear before moving on to the next part. 

I'm not one to cry so I suppose I shocked myself a little to find how upset I was . 

Thanks for listening sweetie. X

Hi Pauline, sorry to hear about your distress. I had my lumpectomy on 23rd March - just over 2cm area removed plus margins. I agree with you that on the surface, the results are good. I haven't felt the area at all yet - being a scaredy cat!! For me, it's on the underside. I will be mentally prepared when I finally check out the area thanks to your post. I don't know if the breast tissue settles down more with time? It might be worth having a chat with the nurse? I think the whole diagnosis and surgery happens so fast, which is good, but it does make it hard to process and so it hits you suddenly xx

Hi Pauline, your surgery is very recent, it's okay to cry we all do at some point. I think your breast has not had time to fully heal,probably still some bruising  there. I could not touch mine for at least 4 weeks. I found thickening near scar not lumpy or jagged. Did not have fat transferrance, just made smaller. Even told I could in future have the other breast to match. Great Surgeon . Not private .Hopefully today will find you more happy & enjoying Easter. 

Hi Hun yes I quite agree with you. Been so positive and suddenly I've lost it. Hopefully as others have said it's gonna settle in time. Don't let how I feel have an impact on you I'm sure it will be find. Just over reacted to the first proper touch. Good luck. Xxx

Hi thanks. I'm very pleased with the scaring. It's the internal areas were the cancer was cut away, seams very lumpy and hard. Hopefully as others have said it's early days and will settle. Think I've calmed down a little after reading everyone's replies. So thanks to all. Xx

Thanks Pauline, just waiting on my margins and nodes now. Good luck with your next set of results - never ends!! 

Hi sweetie. Sounds as if we are about at the same stage. My size and op identical to yours.  Mine just below the nipple mid way in the breast. Scar around the nipple very neat, sentinel lymph node under arm not so good very lumpy. Same as you I wasn't sure if I wanted to touch and find out what was left. Looks good on surface so was surprised when underneath felt so rough. But now I've calmed down and thought about it, it makes sense as the others have said that all tissue left behind is gonna be swollen and bruised too. Like you I hope to have my after surgery results soon and know where we go from there. Good luck with yours and I'm sure they will be fine. Xxx and yes I think it never ends. We will be on this roller coaster for some time yet. X

Hi. I know that feeling.  I had lumpectomy in February and radiotherapy in March. I still have a few tears when I look at myself. Lopsided boobs.  Who wants them ?  Im

still a bit swollen and sore.  But I guess we will learn to look upon it as our battle scars and it will remind us how lucky we are that they caught the cancer in time x

Hi yeah I guess we will get used to them eventually. Still  awaiting results and then what ever is next in treatment. Luckily I'm not to sore have a high pain threshold so not used many pain killers. But also means I feel well enough to want to do things.x