Hi Archie,

So sorry to read about your circumstances, sadly this isn't an unusual situation. You've already received some sound advice, so I'll try to keep this short.

The real experts on your rights as a carer are MacMillan - see www.macmillan.org.uk/.../your-rights-as-a-carer.html Their contact details are on that page. 

I don't know how severe your anxiety and depression are but you may find this advice from MIND to be useful. www.mind.org.uk/.../

Unison will be pleased to have you join but it would be unusual for a union to take on a case which existed before a membership started. This would be like taking out car insurance after your car had been stolen and then hoping for the insurance company to help fund a replacement. I only mention this to set your expectations, as I've known people join Unison in the past to help fight an on-going dispute only to be refused help. 

Rather than threatening you with HR, your boss should be referring you to them to get help. Once you are aware of your rights, it would be worth contacting HR, explaining the home situation and the fact that you believe that this is impacting negatively on your performance to them and asking for their help. MB01's experience shows that however good an employer's HR policies are (and the NHS's can be exemplary) they are easily let down by a bad line manager who lacks the training in, and even knowledge of, a Trust's HR policies and processes. Sadly many people are promoted into management with little or no management training or even basic understanding of the HR side of their roles and responsibilities as a line manager. 

I can easily imagine the toll this is taking on you - try to hang on in there.

Best wishes, I hope things improve soon.

Dave

Archie

To add to the responses above (and I may be repeating some of them), I would also suggest the following

-MacMillan provide a lot of support to those undergoing cancer treatment and their families and may be able to support/advise
- You may have an Employee Assistance program which can support also, or depending on your industry an industry body (like the Retail Trust) or a union?

I would however suggest that you make a note of all the issues and share your concerns with someone in the HR dept at your work as a pre-emptive strike and also make very clear your thoughts with your boss, and keep notes of all meetings which if things do not get resolved internally may be of use at a later stage.
Also are there any other managers ( or higher bosses) that you can talk to if your line manager is just really not engaging at all and is determined to try & get rid of you?  It may be good to run things past them to get another point of view and advise as to what you could do.

Also on your specific point re this (new?) system I'm intrigued as to what training you've had (given you'll still be quite new to it having only started job earlier this year), how the system is perceived by others & what training they're had.  Was this a point in your performance improvement plan (if not seems like an oversight) and what is the company/your boss - or you doing to embrace (or sort out?) this new system that sounds quite fundamental to success in your role?

I wish you & your wife lots of luck during this (insert bad swear word here) time.

Sam X
 

Do work know what is happening? 
import mother/ mother in law to help asap

Hi

sprry to hear about your situation.  So here is my perspective for what it's worth. Nobody goes to work to do a bad job, sometimes we don't perform because we haven't been given the training or the correct toolset or we don't have the right mindset which could be things going on at home, or with ourselves.  Unfortunately it sounds like your manager has gone into proving mode rather than understanding and supporting mode.  
I would suggest that you keep notes of all of your conversations with your line manager and have someone accompany you to any meetings.  You say "we've" not been Closing cases out properly which suggests it's not just you, I would ask if they are checking everyone's cases and not just yours if this is the case. I would also try and get the situation back under your control, by stating that you are happy to receive feedback and if there is something that you are not doing if they can point it out you will make sure you do it going forward and that you are willing to undertake further training if needed. Also have a think about what will help with your wife and home situation and also put that on the table, I would be open with them about what's going on and needing more flexibility and ask what options are available to you. They should look into what reasonable adjustments they can make at work to enable you to be in work.  I would also have a confidential chat with your HR lead about home and that you are looking for support but feel that this isn't forthcoming. 
 

Hope you get it sorted, work is one thing that you don't need to be worrying about at the moment.

wl

Archie

The way you describe the "systems" issues this would not be grounds for any disciplinary issues, sounds like your boss wasn't as much on the ball as she should be if not closing cases for a number of months is a big issue eh?  Was this part of the training, is it part of written processes, do others do this etc.??

I do think you need to get on the offensive a bit more though as your boss is clearly wanting to make a big issue of this.

Good luck

Sam X

Wish me luck. 
I'm just about to go into a 'capability' meeting.

theres a note taker.

i thought they were for disciplinarys? 

It's been adjourned for 15 mins.

So she's been digging into my past cases. A lot of talk about potential dismissal from the organisation. 
I have a well-being person with me. I feel terrible. I feel that this is it. 

Adjourned again for half an hour.

Shes summing up her thoughts. Speaking with HR on the phone and then it's feedback time. I honestly think I'm gone here.

Hi

What happened? Did they send you a letter inviting you to this meeting and advising you that dismissal could be a potential outcome? They would need to for any dismissal to be considered fair in a tribunal. 
 

wl