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Draining messages from family

UpTheWall
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First of all let me just say that I know how lucky I am to have friends and family who care however...

I’m over a year in with chemo every 2 weeks and all their texts still ask 

“how are you feeling”

”how are the side effects this time”

”how are you”

”just checking in”

Etc 

I’ve told them all before that I just want to be treated as I was before diagnosis. I’m not burying my head in the sand but also I’m sick of my life revolving around cancer. The constant asking how I am drives me mad.

The truth is I just want to forget about it, I’m having fun with my son then they text and it just slaps me in the face yet again.

im not even sure what I’m meant to reply? How is telling them that I feel sick or I’m constipated helping anyone? If anything was up, I needed help or ended up in hospital they would know about it.

It probably sounds really selfish but I don’t want some pity party and it’s bringing me down and also winding me up at the same time. 

 

 

 

 

  • Offline in reply to KKGab

    Hey,

    Sorry to hear you've been feeling unwell and not getting anywhere. Excuse me if I repeat anything you've already read...
    I went to A&E with severe abdominal pains, I'd been feeling sick which progressed to being physically sick for months. At hospital they took bloods my liver markers came back high. So they admitted me, they believed it was gallstones but when they did an ultrasound the following day it showed my liver was covered in tumours. The liver is not usually the primary site so then they gave me a CT scan which is where they found another tumour this time in the bowel. 
    This all went on within the space of about a week.

    The CT scans are pretty indepth and should pick up any tumours so that's a very good sign that yours have came back clear.

    I'm no Dr but I think the fact there's nothing on the scans is great news. That's not to say there isn't anything else wrong, it could be a wide range of things (when we were speculating what was wrong the symptoms could have been a sign of colitis, crones, IBD). I think Drs are very quick to believe just because people are young that they don't know when something is wrong.

     

  • Offline in reply to Kajena

    Hey,

    Sorry to hear your dad is unwell, cancer is such an awful disease. My husband receives the "how are you?" Messages a lot too. It's very hard to live normally when you feel like it's being thrown in your face at every turn.

    Its been a while since I first posted this thread and generally the texts have calmed down a lot (however I'm just about to go in for surgery so I guess that will change again). 
     

    A close friend was recently diagnosed and I found myself on the other side of it all, I didn't want to bombard them with texts but I also didn't want them to think I didn't care. I found the "thinking of you texts" worked perfectly. Not asking for a reply but letting someone know you care. 

  • Offline in reply to UpTheWall

    I'm experiencing the opposite to be honest. Yes, I'm getting plenty of support from my family and it's not over the top, it's nice to know they are thinking of me. However, my best friend of 55 years, who I have only seen once since starting my chemo last October is constantly on Facebook, and I know he sees my posts when I have had a bad week, as his wife comments, but, nothing from him and it's making me feel very very sad.

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