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Lack of support

Macca2503
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Hi All,

This is my first post on this group, so bear with me :-) 

My fiance was diagnosed with Terminal Cancer last December and was only given a year to live. He has now finised pallative chemotherapy and we have an appointment with the consultant tomorrow to understand what happens next.

He has lost a lot of weight due to the chemo as he has lost his appetitite and has had a lot of sickness over the past 4 months. Obviously this has been devastating news and our lives have been torn apart but what I have really struggled with is the general lack of support and someone to turn to, to ask questions etc. Maybe I should have joined this forum a while ago, but have had to put all my strength into him. I have to work as I still need to pay the mortgage and bills, but i am drowning in guilt because I leave him at home everyday.. Macmillan have provided no support whatsoever and my local hospice only deal with referrals from the hospital. I suppose my question is, is there anyone else out there that we can turn to, to provide emotional and pratical help?

Thanks in advance 

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    Hi macca I'm sorry you're having a trying time, have you tried marie curie I think you have to go through a doctor or someone High up medical they should help with care maybe a bit more, have you any life insurance, sorry for asking that just it might help you a bit sorry I cannot think of anything else. Hopefully others will have a better idea, best wishes,. 

    Billy 

  • Offline in reply to Billygoat

    Thank you for replyinhg Billy and yes it would be the same with Marie Curie, we would have to be referred by the hospital but thanks for your reply.

     

     

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    I'm so sorry to hear your situation macca, I can totally understand hence I posted today. We've not had any referrals yet but I did drop into the local Maggie centre near us. They listened which I think at the moment is all I need, someone to talk to about how I'm feeling as I can't burden my husband. I'm sure reading some posts on this site will give you the strength you need to help you get through this. Take care of yourself as that's what I keep getting told. X

  • Offline in reply to RM21

    Hi

    sorry to hear of your situation. Financially there is little support out there apart from claiming relevant benefits. Is you husband in a pension scheme? People who have or had cancer can access their pension early. What is the GP doing to support your situation, there should be a care plan in place.

  • Offline in reply to RM21

    Thank you RM21,  sorry to hear that you sound like you are in a similar situation... Yes, I am often being told to look after myself as I need my strength but some days I feel very broken but can’t let that side of my emotions show as it’s not fair on my fiancé. I’ve never heard of the Maggie Centres but have just googled them and there isn’t a local centre for me but I have their number so will call them and see if there is any advice they can offer. I will continue to try and get some strength from here too as there are people that will ‘get it’ like yourself. Thank you for referencing the Maggie centre, fingers crossed they can help. Wishing you strength also x

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