Hello there Faithgirl; you sound to be going round in a circle with no way out.  Is the chemotherapy you are now receiving actually doing some good (leaving aside the horrible side effects for the moment).  Have you talked to your doctors about their opinion of whether you can ultimately expect a good outcome from it?  Pardon me for not minding my own business but I feel this is a key consideration but you need to be sure of where things are going.  Put bluntly, is it worth hanging on even if it only means that you will gain extra time.  That has to be your decision. If you decide it is not helping you then I can understand that you would want to be back in the UK with your family.  How is your husband managing with the kids at the moment?  And who is giving you help while you are abroad?  There may be a way through this depending on how much support you need.  If you would like to keep talking to us please forgive me for asking these questions and others here may be able to give advice also.  I am so sorry you are going through this.  Annie

Hello there Faithgirl; you sound to be going round in a circle with no way out.  Is the chemotherapy you are now receiving actually doing some good (leaving aside the horrible side effects for the moment).  Have you talked to your doctors about their opinion of whether you can ultimately expect a good outcome from it?  Pardon me for not minding my own business but I feel this is a key consideration but you need to be sure of where things are going.  Put bluntly, is it worth hanging on even if it only means that you will gain extra time.  That has to be your decision. If you decide it is not helping you then I can understand that you would want to be back in the UK with your family.  How is your husband managing with the kids at the moment?  And who is giving you help while you are abroad?  There may be a way through this depending on how much support you need.  If you would like to keep talking to us please forgive me for asking these questions and others here may be able to give advice also.  I am so sorry you are going through this.  Annie

hello Annie 

I’m sorry didn’t replay earlier. Yes the treatment is working my latest ct scan showed a 25% reduced on the cancer cells so we’re hopeful. 

My husband is looking after the kids, but he is very depressed with the whole situation and has been prescribed anti depressants by his GP. 

I’m starting new session of chemotherapy tomorrow for another 6 weeks, then I will make a decision. 

But it’s been the hardest time for me to stay away from my kids and my husband. 

My family is very supportive but after almost 2 months it has been some friction, specially after living in London for 18 years. So I don’t think like anyone else. 

I guess I need to sit and wait! 

Hello again, just caught up with you after being away for a few days.  Keeping everything crossed for a continued  reduction on the cancer cells.  This is such an awful situation - you really have too many things to stress you out.  Please keep us informed of what is happening and what plans you have; when I read this kind of dilemma I don't like to think that of you on your own away from your family so hope chatting with the people here will help a bit.  Annie