I have told her parents they actually said they'd had there doubts all along but did nothing 

She has said shes getting some sort of therapy but if that's true or not I dont know 

Well you've passed it on ... so now leave it to them .. but if I were you, I'd stay well clear .. and cut off ties .. or you may be dragged in further ... some relationships are best looking back ..

Good luck ... Chrissie    ; )) 

Hi all,

Im really sorry to Hijak this thread. I am very concerned about a friends mental state and wondered if anyone could shed some light on my thoughts.

I girl (aged 29) i started working with early this year has confided some very personal things to me which I thought nothing of until very recently.

She stated that she was awaiting an operation to sort out some issues, but before this she would need to have injections to induce menopause. I thought nothing of this and didnt question further as I didnt want to be intrusive. She said that she had declined the induced menopause treatment, but that the hospital had said the operation would still go ahead despite this. SHe was awaiting the go ahead from the hospital with a date for the operation.

Within weeks of the above, she informed me that she had some irregular bleeding and a lump in her groin area. She told me that the lump was so prominent that her mum had noticed it as a bump on her skin. I told her to speak to her GP as a matter of urgency, which she did.

6 days after me telling her to speak to her doctor she came to me and said that the lump was cancerous and that she was having to isolate for 14 days before having surgery to have it removed. I thought this was a very quick investigation but I didnt think anything of it and wished her good luck. On the day after her surgery she sent me a text saying that the operation was a success, the lump had been removed, plus they had also removed a lymph node.

Two weeks later she told me she had been for a check up and had bloods taken and an ultrasound to check everything was ok. Three days later she informed me that the results had come back and the doctors had informed her that she was pregnant.

The later stages of this have made me question the whole thing. Especially given this is in the height of the coronavirus pandemic and I am aware of people with cancer who have had urgent treatment delayed.

Surely a referal for tests and an appointment with a specialist would of occured?

6 days between an initial doctors appointment and diagnosis/results seems very quick to me?

If she had a cancerous lump, why would she not be getting chemo / radio treatment?

Is it normal to have a lymph node taken whilst surgery for having a lump removed is being completed? Surely they would of known this in advance?

Im genuinly concerned as this has made me question a few other serious personal things she has told me and I am now questioning her mental health.

Im sorry if some of my information is vague but ive not pressed her as I feel uncomfortable doing so. However I feel that she may need some support and I wouldnt like to just leave her to it. Its strange as she has nothing to gain from telling me lies. I feel like me questioning her in this way makes me the worst person in the world, but it is really playing on my mind.

I have experienced loss through cancer and I would hate for me to have this completely wrong. The story just does not ring true to me.

I would really appreciate any advice.

Thank you for reading this.

I can only give you my personal opinion, on my own experience with cancer. 6 days does seem to be a fast turn around, I have no idea if it can be done that fast, but it does sound far too fast when going through the process

If she had a lump, they usually need to have a biopsy and they take 2/3 weeks to come back, someplaces are longer due to covid, mine was 2 and a half weeks before they rang me to ask me to go in and see them,  this was end of march at the start of lockdown, it then took a further week and half to get a CT Scan, I was given hormone therapy this was to buy time and was due to covid and my other health issues. I was told I would need a further CT in 3 months,  ( which would of being July) I'm still waiting for them to remove my cancer, (womb) 7 months after I was diagnosed, and the CT Scan has being delayed too, I finally have that through its for monday 21st September 6 months and a bit months after I was diagnosed I have no idea how others are doing but believe that they are lots of delays to treatment at the minute due to covid.

Did she ever say what the cancer was ( the type) or where the cancer was situated, or where the lymph node was removed from ? Lymph nodes can be removed, especially if they are close to the Tumour, I was told this is usually decided when they do the surgery, depending on what they find in the surgery, again this is information I was given for myself.  I'm not sure what bleeding has to do with a lump in the groin, again I'm assuming she ment like period bleeding.

They are lymph nodes in the groin, these can swell up, usually because our bodys are fighting some type of infections or due to an inflammatory response, they generally go down on there own but if they don't they are usually investigated, with an ultrasound first, then depending on what they see and if it looks suspicious, they then take a biopsy. I'm not aware of lymph nodes in the groin having anything to do with the bleeding she mentioned, if it period bleeding.

There are injections that can be given to induce the menopause, but I do not know of any reasons, she would need it before an operation, but I'm not a dr, maybe others on here might have some insight into that. 

Your questions with regards chemo etc, I was told with my type of cancer if caught early enough (stage 1) I might not need chemo or radiotherapy, I have no idea if thats the case for other cancers, they told me my cancer will be staged when they remove it.

Its hard to say if she has exaggerated/lied to you, as you have not pressed her for the full facts, all you can do is listen, look up what she tells you, if she is lying sooner or later you might be able to judge if thats the case, maybe if you are comfortable you can speak with her friends maybe they are like you worrying.

​​​​

Hi,

I have asked a few questions and she has told me some more.

I asked what the cancer was and where? her reply was... 'the lump they removed was cancerous but not active so by all accounts my cervix is ok. they looked at my bladder and bowel and was happy with what they saw, so they think the cancer cells are hormonal which they will treat once i have had the baby'

Then I asked her if there was any follow up treatment and she said no because the cancer was not active. she said she is now thinking of a hysterectomy once the baby is born too.

I dont know why this doesnt ring true to me. 3 weeks from initial doctors appointment to surgery and removal of cervical cancer? then pregnant almost straight away?

really appreciate your reply. I was worried to post in here given that i know people genuinly will be on their own journey and things like this detract from that. I hope you are doing well and all the luck in the world with your procedure x

Hi Eluven

Its hard to say, I know very little about cervical cancer, she could be talking about pre cancerous cells she had removed, just me guessing, cancer in the cervix can be reactive to estrogen, the hormone estrogen is a major driver in the growth of cervical cancer, and some other cancer like breast and womb

sorry must of clicked the wrong reply, still getting a hang of the site.