Hi all, so sorry I haven't been on, it's been a rough few weeks. So operation on 24th went ok all as planned. They put me on ICU and then my lungs gave up! Loads of drama etc later I wake up on 30th October. I was worried, confused etc. Best feeling in the world was knowing I was alive. The gaps slowly got filled and I learnt of all the anxiety and stress my poor man and all my friends dealt with. I almost died. But I'm here, they tell me I am recovering nicely, few extra wounds from drains etc. Best moment ever was holding my babies and knowing that I fought to stay. Nothing is taking me away from my babies. I have kicked the fags which is something I struggled with several times beforehand and I am staying off them. I just need to remind myself why i stopped. Hopefully next time I see my consultant I find out I am cancer free. I hope you all are ok as can be and if anyone has questions I am here xxx