Hi Fallon,

Yes, I feel that way, too. I smoked for 35 years, didn't go the doctor and generally abused my body.  I got stage 2A cervical cancer. Had treatment and am 6 years out. I had a good friend, a mother, a wife and a kind, loving, pious woman, die of ovarian cancer. And there have been others. Why her/them and not me?  Yes, I understand the guilt.  But, I do think there is a reason for it all. There has to be! I try to make a difference when I can with other people who are suffering with this disease by comforting and telling my story, my experiences.  That is what we have to do. I hope you find some peace, you deserve it.

Laura xx

Hi there, 

I totally agree with [@LauraP]‍ 

My dad is only 61 and will die soon from cancer. But I wouldn't want you to feel guilty for that if you saw him! I was really shocked reading your post that you guys would feel this way. I think is absolutely fantastic that you have both survived cancer and my dad in particular would be thrilled for you as I am. This is a horrible disease that causes absolute devastation, I think you're both incredibly strong and lucky to have gotten through it and come out the other side. Please don't feel guilty just make the most of every day now because you guys know first hand how precious and short life is. 

Xxxxx

Thank you [@MiGi]‍ . I am sorry to hear about your father. Praying for you both.

Laura xx

Hi F

Sorry you have been feeling like this xx 

Survivor guilt is an actual thing and it is certainly treatable too xx there is no need for you to carry this guilt around with you any longer. Please do speak with your GP about how you’re feeling and it’s likely they’ll refer you to an expert who can sort this out for you. 

If you’re in the UK...you can sometimes self refer to these experts (google IAPT services in your area and see what comes up). Where I live, a GP can refer you to this fabulous centre we have that helps with these sorts of things or there’s the option to miss out the GP and go directly to them. 

I would urge you to take some action in this regard...you sound like a lovely, caring person....you can be free of this xx 

Thank you for all your kind replies x it is comforting to know others feel the same. What an awful thing cancer is and how many people’s life’s it affects