Hi there Ella... oh my, bless ya... I can see just how worried you are ... try to talk with your mum or dad and tell them how you feel, or even write them a letter ... they may not have talked to you about it, to protect you, so you don't worry... but I've found gentle honesty is so needed, with young ones ... so maybe telling them you know and need to feel included ... 

I have cancer, and my grandkids knew and they were amazing... young ones are braver then we think ... but as you know your grandad sounds very poorly, and may need you to be strong for him... he will forget things and all you have to do, is go with him, and if that means repeating things, that's o.k ... try not to say, I've already told you , or you've already said that, as that tends to confuse them ... please try to take one day at a time... and you know, those feelings your having is quite normal ... it's so hard to see someone we love, so poorly ...

If you can't talk to mum or dad, have you someone you can trust, like a good auntie, or uncle, or older brother or sister ... but please don't hold it in ... let us know how you go ... sending you a big hug ... Chrissie xx 

Thanks Chrissie...Honestly im so thankful for your reply... I was feeling so low today but reading your message has cheered me up massively...I spent some time with my grandad today...Just hope i can spend christmas with him. Its makes me so happy to know that the cancer research acctually does these forums. I wasnt aware of this forum where you can share your feelings openly and have people who dont even know you, make you so happy. 

Thank you sooo much! Ella xxx

Hi Ella.  I know it is not my business but I wonder how old you are and how old your grandad is.  I was fourteen when my grandad (my mum's parents) died and he was in his 70s - I was very sad because he used to tell me silly stories when I was young; he lived nearby - unlike my dad's parents who lived a long way away and died when I was even younger.  Grandparents are great - they haven't got the responsibility of parenting and they can spoil you rotten.   He died suddenly from a heart attack which was probably the easiest way for him to go as he had no prolonged suffering.  Do talk to your parents so you can share with the care he needs and you all share your sadness.  Do  also - if you wish - let us know how things are going.

Hi there Ella... so glad it helped a little ...you will have up and down days , but I'm on here most days, until Sunday as I'm off on holiday till new year ... but however your feeling you can put on here ... please let me know if you can talk to mum or dad and if it went well ...

You pack lovely memories in to  every day you have with your wonderfull grandad... I bet he has some memories of when he was young , he'd like to share ... or how he met your nan ... look through albums ... you will make any time he has loving memories... the picture I have is my amazing granddaughter Emily... we laugh all the time .. we adore each other ... so I'm packing in good memories so she can look back with smiles ... I've made her a little memorie book, since she was 1 ... every funny loving time we spent ... coz it would break my heart if she cried when thinking of me ... 

A saying I live by is ... don't cry because you loose someone... smile because you were blessed to have had them in your life ... your grandad will be so proud of you ... sending you a big hug brave lass ... Chrissie xx