Well That was brutal. Felt awful yesterday after first chemo and only got one hours sleep. Very fuzzy headed and achy. Seems very real now. Has anyone heard of a grade 3 aggressive cancer that’s not spread as far as scans show and people have made a full recovery. I’m just scared and can’t bring myself to think of the future. I’ve convinced myself I’m gonna get further bad news and can almost hear the doctors putting a time on my life. Sorry just having a really bad day today :-(

Slowly getting back on track. I have never been a sick person always just soldier on this has really shook me up good and proper. Still on the rollercoaster. Normally would have pulled myself together by now! Going to have some reki done next week see if that will settle my mind a bit. Has helped in the past! Big hug to you all I know some need it more than others at moment thinking of you all xx 

Oh dizzel bless u. So sorry u r feeling so bad ( both physically and emotionally). When is your next session nd how many have u got scheduled?

Everyone says take it one day at a time and just deal with that day...it makes it more manageable.  Try not to do the what ifs or the should haves, would haves nd could haves In these early days - you will only see negatives down that route. Today just think of how you will deal with today. 

I know how hard it is to not keep thinking the worst. When I was at hosp for my post op results I’d been sitting 3 hrs past my appt.... I was thinking- they are keeping me till the end cos it’s  really bad news and need more time to talk through things so not taking me in. It wasn’t bad news it’s was good ..... they were simply running 3 hrs behind. The dark places our mind can take us if we let it. All back to just dealing with the here nd now facts. 

Rest is the order of the day. Followed by a couple more dollops of rest. 

That pressure u feel on yr shoulder is a squeeze of support from me. Nd lots of virtual hugs ️ X

Good morning all...hi dizzle. Best advice I got was take it 1 day at a time and listen to your body.  I can't answer about grade 3 with no evidence of spread from personal experience but from what I've been told by my team and reading I've done is that no spread is the key. No evidence of spread means it's still contained in the breast. That is always a cause for celebration although I'm sure you don't feel much like celebrating right now. Keep your team updated with how you feel...ie nausea etc as they can give you meds to help reduce some symptoms. Remember each session is a step closer to being cancer free hun. You can do this.

Hi beachbabe. The whole experience is traumatic no matter the outcome. Great idea to do some reiki....not done it myself but heard it is great for installing calmness and serenity.

Me.....RT fatigue hit me like a sledgehammer yesterday. I could not open my eyes for 2 hours even though i was not truly asleep. Went with it and felt better when i got up. 

Today after picking daughter up we are going to mother in laws for the night and going to see Jurassic park. Have built in enough time to have a nap at mother in laws before we go so I can keep my eyes open lol. Hope today brings better and good things to all xxx

Hi Everyone

The things we go through make us stronger is what my mum used to say, well yes I suppose it does. So hang on in there everyone we will all be super heroes....well some of us already are. Lol

My other contribution for the day is to rename radiotherapy , tanning sessions. You lie there on the bed, get a tan and have a nice doze afterwards, just like when you are on a nice warm Caribbean beach.

Good

My weird sense of humour is resurfacing although for some that might be bad. Only three days grumpy stockings and blood thinners. Tuesday and treatment plan on the horizon.

Bad

Nothing of any importance,

Look after yourselves.

Sundial

Bless u will get there hun.

when I first met with my oncologist as she was covering everything one of the things she said was that at the end of treatment many people experience low mood and advised about the support group at the hospital that might help. 

Once the treatment machine kicks in its like someone grabs u by the hand nd drags u around a high speed from one place to another then when finished they open a door leave go of yr hand drop u in a lifeboat cut loose of the rope that ties u to the mooring nd slam the door shut. Nd there we are - just floating adrift bemused and bewildered. 

Its a case of - now I had equilibrium and a life- so... where did I leave them. Some find them quickly, some take longer, some take a lot longer. Some need help to find them. All this while dealing with the ravages treatment can leave behind on our bodies.

You will get there hun, how u are feeling is natural and normal. You will get there u just need to give yourself the time you need. X

Lol yes....i also have a weird sense of humour and when I was talking to a friend and she said what doesn't kill you makes you stronger I said let's hope it doesn't lol. I don't think she quite knew what to do or say for a moment but knows me well enough to laugh with me. 

Hmmmm.......tanning sessions and caribbean.....am yet to be convinced but may try closing my eyes today and use visualisation to take me away to turtle beach on Barbados.. ....will let you know if it works later!

Blood thinners and stockings....how much fun are you having? Leave some room for the rest of us to enjoy the good life lol!!!  Xxx

Hi ladies. Sorry been combating my fatigue this week. Can't believe I've still got it but I guess 6 weeks of tanning will take time. 

Ladies you will all get there - focus on the outcome and the fact that you are strong and you got this! Guaranteed some days are easier than others but keep going as you will get there. It's natural to let the mind wander as we've been thrown into a bubble we weren't prepared for no matter how many booklets or information given. YOU WILL GET THERE AND BE RID OF BAS**** CANCER!

One day at a time....

Thanks yeh I’m gonna take full advantage of the 6 therapeutic sessions the macmillan centre offers like reiki and Indian head massage. Feel a bit better after a bath and nice hair wash....while I still have it lol x