Hey Chris's

Thank you.that was my first proper down day. Shook me a bit....but had a stern word from @Sandra123 and I'm back on positive avenue. 

It's my little one I worry about. She's 8. I also have a boy of 24 and 2 other girls of 30 and 29. I just wanna see my girl grow up. I been trying to look at long term stats (not dr google but proper research papers). They are very general though. So I have decided that when I see my oncologist all my data should have gone through the prognostic calculator and I want to know recurrence risk and prognosis percentage for me. Again I go to the practical. I don't think of this as negativity but ensuring I am fully informed. 

Some karma also....i forgot but I took out a wrll woman policy in 2006 and I won't need yo worry about finances if I go over my full sick pay entitlement. 1 less thing to worry about huh. 

I live in the London/border of Essex area but Cornish born bred and proud lol. After my op is out of the way I'd love to meet up if any of you ladies are closish. 

Thanks again....and I won't feel such a failure for a down day as and when it happens again x

I think that's the problem in a nutshell....no one has a clue how they will cope. Emotionally or physically. I've started to talk to my work to plan to be off for the entirety of my radiotherapy and possibly a few weeks after. My service head has said I can do whatever I feel able or not and the will support me. Sadly they lost 3 social workers in my service area to cancer last year alone so they know what it can be like. I was just explaining to Chriss that I have a financial buffer in a well woman policy so extended time off if needed is not going to be crippling financially. At least i wont have to worry about that. X

If you work on local govt (you said you are a social worker), time off wouldn’t be a problem, at least not initially. My boss’s sister has had two bouts of breast cancer so he was and is aware of what can happen. I actually refused to discuss my situation with my line manager as he couldn’t grasp that I couldn’t put dates and timelines on treatment and recovery. 

Your youngest daughter will be fine, she probably is already aware that something is happening, kids aren’t daft. She is certainly going to be aware when you are in hospital overnight. I think there might be a section on this site about how to talk to children so what comes after isn’t a shock and doesn’t frighten them. 

I’ve actually met up with one of the other ladies you have chatted to on here and we are planning to do it again some time! I’m a tyke and proud of it, she lives closer to you so we met up in London. 

Hey Rileyroo

I am definately up for a meet up. We haven't used the c word with the youngest. We just told her that their is a part of mummys booby that is sick and the doctor has to take it away. She asked a few questions....more about who would look after her and daddy while I'm in hospital lol. I had to explain that daddy is able to look after himself and her....it was quite a funny conversation. 

I might ask for a meeting with HR so that I can be clear on things with them but feel quite ok that they will be supportive.

Davek, one of the guys on here, directed me to part of this site regarding cancer and how to deal with employers. I found it extremely useful, might be worth a read. 

Hi Rileyroo

Do you know where I can find it please?

Morning everyone 

ah cornishpastie Rileyroo is one of the ladies who kept me grounded ( she’s brill). Think u were a month ahead of me weren’t u Rileyroo?

Rileyroo is right give yourself time. Better to over estimate and achieve than underestimate  nd  get concerned u are taking longer than u said. 

Have a goodin peeps x

If you put in disability discrimination act in the coping with cancer area it will come up, yes we are covered by it. 

Evening Nikki:-)

ive been out all day nd just back now. Bless not what u need...an ear infection. Are u on antibiotics? How u doing with the iron tablets? Get why u want to go on the sick... u sound really run down bless . X