Tongue Cancer - Diagnosed two days ago

Hi, I am a 32 year old single mum to my two year old daughter and I found out two days ago that I have tongue cancer.  I'm waiting for an appointment for an MRI scan and a CT scan which should hopefully be within the next few days and this can find out if the cancer has spread.  I then have to have an appointment to discuss a treatment plan but I have already been told that this will involve cutting out the lump in my tongue and a neck dissection to remove Lymph nodes.

It's all such a lot to take in and I'm trying to come to terms with the fact that in a few weeks time my life will never be the same again.  I have read some horrific stories about what I have to come and I am willing to face any of it so long as I stay alive for the sake of my daughter.  I have only told my parents and one friend so far, no piont telling everyone until I have more facts after the scans but I'm concerned at how far the cancer could have spread.  I have had this painful lump on my tongue for six months but the doctors kept giving me prescripotions for other things which has delayed diagnisis.  I have also had pain in my throat and more recently I've noticed ear ache and jaw ache and neck pain.  I'm trying to stay positive until I know more information from the scans but I know I will crumble if it has spread beyond repair.

From reading stories from others on here and other websites, I'm a little confused that I haven't yet been told what stage the cancer is at.  Isn't that something that could be identified from my biopsy?  How could the doctor be so sure that I will need a neck dissection before knowing what stage it's at?

None of this has come of much of a surprise.  I googled my symptoms of a persistent ulcer back in April, before I first went to the doctor and was alarmed to see the word "cancer" everywhere I looked.  I had all the symptoms but was just hoping I was wrong.  The first two doctors I saw about this reassured me that it was nothing more sinister than an ulcer, which put my mind at rest a little, how wrong were they?!  I am just glad that I stayed persistent and kept going back to the doctor about it.  I don't think they treated it as an urgency as I don't fit in with the usual risk factors, I've never smoked, I hardly drink and I'm not in the right age bracket.  I'm now feeling annoyed at the waiting game.  I want to know when the scan will be.

It helps to come on here and read other threads but I still don't think it has fully sunk in yet but when it does, positivity for the sake of my little girl will just have to get me through.  I would love to keep hearing stories from others or any advice would be greatly received.

Nicola xx

Parents
  • Hi Nicola,

    It always seems worse at first, and I like you still refuse to accept it even though I was diagnosed around eighteen months ago. When the Consultants and Doctors talk to me, it feels like they are talking about someone else, I like you, just cannot accept it.

    It,s funny, but every time I kook in the mirrow it seems I am looking at another person, it is certainly a way to loose weight and have a grey wrinkled look, I know it's me, so you have I have no other choice other than trying to accept it.

    My very best wishes, and may some beautiful some days follow you.

    Davidxx

     

     

     

Reply
  • Hi Nicola,

    It always seems worse at first, and I like you still refuse to accept it even though I was diagnosed around eighteen months ago. When the Consultants and Doctors talk to me, it feels like they are talking about someone else, I like you, just cannot accept it.

    It,s funny, but every time I kook in the mirrow it seems I am looking at another person, it is certainly a way to loose weight and have a grey wrinkled look, I know it's me, so you have I have no other choice other than trying to accept it.

    My very best wishes, and may some beautiful some days follow you.

    Davidxx

     

     

     

Children
  • Hi David. Thanks for your message. I think you may have misunderstood me. I certainly haven't refused to accept having had cancer or the side effects I'm left with. I don't feel there is a choice to accept it but I meant that it sometimes feels like it never happened to me....as in my life is carrying on as though I never went through such a huge thing which is great. Hopefully that will give hope to the ones who are going through it now. Glad to hear yours is behind you now as well and hopefully things are better for you now too. Nicola.