Hi Julie.  I'm going through a rather depressive phase at the moment.  

Next time you light up, could you blow the smoke my way please. lol.

I could really fancy one but I'm not going to.

Best wishes

Lesley x

we all make our own choices I SMOKE I drink I have cancer of the rectum and liver but I will support you

we all make our own choices I SMOKE I drink I have cancer of the rectum and liver but I will support you

Thank you all again for your support.

As I drink my glass of wine and smoke my 20th cigarette of the day before bed, I am reminded that I have had this cancer and that with every twinge, I think it has come back and of course I am to blame for my continued bad habits. I will leave this thread now, because there are so many on this site who have very real and devasting news to deal with and I feel that this subject doesn't help them. I'm glad I brought it up because I wanted to come clean and help those who feel they don't deserve to be here chatting with their bad habits hindering their expressions. You have all been absolutely, (as I expected ), amazing, and honestly, when I feel my most lost, it is you all I come to, so thank you. Love Julie xx

Hi Julie,

I know you have left this thread so please don't feel you need to reply but I just wanted to show my support as you touched on something I have been worrying about. I

also saw the lady smoking after throat cancer and have often wondered if that would be me in years to come. I have just been through my second surgery for pre-cancerous lesions.

My first surgery was in April and I was off work for 7 weeks due to an infection. I tried so hard to stop smoking then. I gave up 6 times(I'm not kidding) and my longest was 5 days but

it didn't work. How rubbish am I! Anyway, I was, and still am embarrassed that I still smoke following 2 surgeries but I have had to accept that now is not the time as my head is

not yet in the right place to succeed. I hope it will be someday but,for now, it is not so I must accept that.

I haven't given it a second thought this time and my recovery has been very quick and pain free. I'm not saying this is due to smoking but I think a lot of it is down to not

attempting to stop at the wrong time and the resultant reduction in stress added to the obvious health worries.

I also feel I am possibly not worthy of support at times for the same reason as yourself but I have never felt that others did not deserve support from me, whatever their habits or

lifestyle.

Good health and a long life to you

Jackie xx. 

Dear Jackie

Yes, I was going to leave this thread alone, but I wanted to say thank you for sharing that with me, and all of us, because it means a lot to air our worries and guilt I suppose. I started this thread because in the 2 years I've been on here and through the cancer and out the other side (for the moment), I never mentioned it and never  saw anyone else bring it up (the smoking anyway).  Your words mean a lot to me and I am with you all the way. I'm so glad you've recovered well from your recent treatment and I agree that the psychological worries impede our recovery, outlook, mood, and ultimately our chance of success and quality of life. Of course, the physiological damage smoking does continues, but I feel a Harry Hill fight come on...... !!  Love to you. Keep in touch. Love Julie xx