hi im 36 mother of 3 n diagnosed dec 23. ive had 2 ops n 5 of 6 chemo n finding it very hard at mo. feel so peed off n cant get rid of that feeling. would love to chat. x
I am stunned that the lovely and beautiful ladies that have assisted me and others through cancer are having to question their partners loyalty and commitment when they need it most. I am lost for words but just want to say that am here for you all.
It is tough "hanging in there!" I never questioned my "stay-ability" with my partner as she went through the various stages of her treatment. At the same time I was training for my first London Marathon and where I would drive her too and from hospital, talk to her about "stuff" and be there when times were low, she'd kick me out in the freezing rain to make sure I got my training runs in! The joint result? We are together, she's two years clear and a couple of weeks ago she was there to see me "get round London."
I am not, for one minute, suggesting everyone encourages their partners to run a marathon, but finding a joint interest away from the illness really helped us. It wasn't going to go away like a cold but we tried our best not to let it rule our lives.
glad to hear some have had their boobs sorted out. you lucky buggers! sara ive been lobsided since before cancer but its much worse since radio n have had a fillet? (cant think what its called) since january or so. surgeon wont touch my boobs til pain is bearable. dont know when that will be but my pad makes me feel better in clothes. im sure if you asked about it bc nurse would make app for you to get one. that would be one thing off your mind. i hope you start to feel better soon.
im so glad you are feeling better rose n hope you all had a lovely week away with your family. just what was needed for you! good news about the tranfusion making you feel better too. hows your heart been? n chemo tablets? the sun definately made me feel better but keep over doing things n then cant move for a couple of days. so quite pleased its not so warm so i can rest a little more! had a couple of days when i cant get out of bed n dont like them. i'd like to say that walking is easier but i dont think it is much. arm feels better due to med but im as docile as ever cos of it!
im sorry to hear the knee op wasnt a great sucess nina. i dont blame you for not wanting to have more surgery either especially knee ops! ouch. the next one is knee replacement isnt it? im sure you will be fine when you go back to work hun. youre thinking about it too much. just take your time.
oh colly was sad to read your post. im sure he didnt mean anything by it, i mean who would want to go through it again! as you start to feel less tired n more confident things will fall into place. will chat with you on facebook hun.
hope everyone else is getting on ok. by the way im smoke free for over 3 months now. still cant believe i smoked through chemo n the side affects i had mind! ouch.
Meds have cut the sharp edges off of my pain although I still have my moments. The next step is an MRI to try and get to the bottom of where the pain is coming from. I have been stuck in my bed for the past 6 weeks and so unfortunately have not had a chance to get out on my bike :-(
Hopefully things will brighten up soon and I can take advantage of the sunny weather.
Hi Tony, thank you for replying, but I just want to make it clear that John has been my rock throughout this last year and I couldnt have got through it without him, we were only together a short time when i was diagnosed so i moved in with him on a temp basis so he could look after me, which he done amazingly, he loves me so much, but think because my mammogram is coming up, he's thinking "what if" and to be honest i think he's just thinking how hard it was and doesnt think he could do it again, he went from living on his own to me moving in, all my family visiting all the time and him working a streeful job, we are together and hope to be for a long time, more than anything it was the physical side of our relationship ive been worried about but just really wanted to know if other people were in the same boat. I could never fault John at all, he's being honest by telling me he doesnt know if he could cop with me being ill again, it upset me at the time, but we are working through it and pray to God my cancer has gone for good. Thank you to everybody for replying, I just dont want you guys thinking he's a bad person cause he's not, he's amazing xxx
He does sound amazing and quite often we expect so much from the partners when they must go through hell. Also the honest approach is the best way...As for the physical side - I was worried about that as I am just not interested and spoke with Fran openly...she understands fully which is a great relief.
Reading through again and also your reply it does sound like you have an amazing partner....rather than bottling things up until they burst he is being honest and supportive...i'll bet like you said at first you were upset but once it sunk in it shows that this is the best way i.e. to share you thoughts and feelings totally.
Yes Colly, he does sound amazing and you are pretty amazing too...good luck with the scan.
do any of us feel we can go through another year like we just have, the difference between us and our partners is that should the worst happen...we have to go through it cos giving up is not an option, I am almost positive that by saying what he did he was meaning he couldn't bear to see you go through such pain again because of how much he loves you, he sounds like a real rock in your life and for our partners it is so frustrating for them because their job is to take care of us and protect us from harm and then this blinkin awful illness comes along and they just cant stop it, they cant take away our pain or make us better.
Colly its going to be ok we are still emotionally scarred and our wounds are still fresh, give yourself a break you are such a wonderful and beautiful lady, no man in his right mind would walk away.
Spirits hun what is troubling you at the moment, your message was so vague yet you sound so low, please let us help
Och Lee Im just feeling sorry for me I guess. Wednesday I wanted to just end it all but my middle son called my eldest who in turn brought in the Dr....Suffice to say I wouldnt go into hospital as she wanted me to.
I have a disabled son and didnt want to leave him!!! Still Sunday now and Ive had food and drink the past two days so feeling better and further away from the dark place....
As for Hubby I think if he dosnt talk about it it will go away...I could have swung for him on Wednesday when I was bad and he said I take it your not feeling great today??? DOH!!!!!! what gave him his first clue lol lol I know its hard on hubbies n families, but sometimes just a hug to get us thro Eh???
