Hi. It looks like this discussion thread has been going a long time and i hope i will be able to join the community here. I was diagnosed with breast cancer just after xmas and have had a mastectomy last week. I have a secondary tumor in my hip and possibly in my head so will have to face chemo and radiotherapy although I dont know the details as yet. I would love to make friends on here who i can both support and find support from on this journey. I have 2 grown up children and they have surprised me recently as to how supportive they can be. It certainly is a case of role reversal in my house. Chassis x x

Hi Chassis

Welcome to the place no-one wants to be.Hope you are coping with the mastectomy and glad to see you have support at home.I had mastectomy 4 years ago and have recurrance in the lymph glands in my neck and chest .I have been on chemo for 2 years to contain it and like you have 2 grown up children and 3 grandchildren ,so plenty of reasons to fight on.Hope you have a good medical team looking after you.What part of the world do you live in?We are a well scattered lot on here.

Stay strong.

Rose xxx

well done on giving up smoking, I gave up about 5 years ago but when I was diagnoed the first thing I wanted was a ciggie, I didnt take one, but how it wouldve calmed me down. You guys will be grand, just keep  your chin up babe. I feel good these days but still have this pain in my neck and ive got it in my head its something more sinister, but think thats natural, just waiting on oncologist appt, takes up to 8 weeks after radio finishes, sometimes i think scotland is way behind as no one else seems to wait this long or do they? x

hi netty

nice to meet you. have you spoken to the nurses? maybe you should just have a chat with them n see what they think. dont forget that they are there to support n if you need emotional support or any other, thats their job.

love leonie xx

Hey Leonie,

firstly, we get so upset with our other halves because we are so close to them, and in a way we share each others pain. we blow up a bit here too and i am learning to accept this is yet another side effect. Please remember that normal arguments would ensue without a thought - but now they are all connected to the feelings and side effects that occur as a result of diagnosis and treatment. we go through so many emotions. Im glad you came here to rant, it's what we are here for - and yes i noticed too that in the net breath you were helping others.

Give yourself a bit of a break and a pat on the back too, because caring and feeling is what makes us human, and there are too many people in this world who don't have those human qualities. yes it hurts, but it must be more painful to not have love and compassion.  sending you a huge hug.

well, that's the chemo done, and now i have the radio to look forward to. I am so scared - I know i should give up smoking and i shall relaly try, and will keep you updated. |it is so hard when you have so much stress. I am worried as well about the shrinkage of the tissue and having lop sided boobs, and then remind myself of how so many of you have already coped with far more to worry about. I am concerned about tattoos as they are the on thing i would never ever ever have, and then not being able to go topless on holiday this year. i wanted so much just to have the wedding and then a 'normal' holiday. Oh this thing is such tosh.

The hair is still very slowly creeping through, the tooth is still missing and the feel better course is still fully booked and it looks like June before i can have a makeover. Such is life!

most of the time i am doing well and pretty positive, but it makes such a difference being able to moan here about things that given the circumstances would be seen as trivial to anyone else. Just being able to say i am p****ed off or feel ugly lightens the load.

love sara xx

My dear Lonie, I do know how you feel, even though Im feeling much better these days I remember only too well the pain and the sickness always trying to put a smile on my face, crack a joke and remain positive for everyone else, and then when it just got that little bit too much for me  and I couldnt manage that smile or that little joke my husband would ask me what was wrong!!! I would bark at him IVE GOT CANCER THATS WHATS WRONG and he would snap at me saying it wasnt his fault and why was I being moody with him....AAAARRRRGGGHHH I just wanted to say ..because I need to be moody with someone at some point or I will go crazy but because he was cross with me I would just curl up into a ball and sob like there was no tomorrow,,, most unlike me!

Until this moment I had never and I mean NEVER let a man reduce me to such a pitiful and emotional wreck, yet It wasnt really him doing it to me, it was my condition and it only hurt so much because I love him so much as indeed you love your husband, he is your rock and sometimes rocks become slippery and we fall and hurt ourselves but we get back up and when we look around the rock is still there and always will be.

You will get past this and one day you will not be able to remember how bad you felt even though you may try.

You will be strong again and laugh again and your good days will be many.

I send you my love and a great big strength hug.

Lee xxxxxxxx

A huge welcome to the new girls! Im sorry your here but you wont meet a greater bunch of women.

Hi leonie

I wanted to say thank you for starting this post.It is partly good because in hospital people always seem to be carrying things off more graciously than i can manage,finding that other people have dark days puts things in perspective.I am sure he does not really think you are lazy,it must make him sad seeing you in pain and men do seem to have a tendency to cover their feelings with a good huff /mardy.That is such a good word.I hope things are going better for you.

I

Hello to all

I have been catching up on the chat and have laughed about Miranda in Tony's shed and had visions of a blow up dolly until I realised he was referring to his bike! and laughed even more at Colly's f***y magnet and the images that it has conjured up in some of your minds, lol.  That story has been told down the local pub!

To Lonie I say here here to what all the others have said, I hope that you will soon be feeling stronger and pain free, it makes me realise how lucky I have been with the side effects.  My Hubby used to go down the pub and the guys there have really helped him through and I thank them all as it really helps to talk to someone and do something normal.

Good news to share - I became a Grannie yesterday for the first time, our son and wife produced a boy, we are so happy.  Amongst all this s**t we have a bundle of joy to bring us happiness. I held him yesterday and thought what a miracle life is and long may it continue.

Love to you all

Anne

x

hi anne

this page is great isnt it. you can laugh as well as cry! thanks for what you said, means a lot. wish he would go out but he doesnt like to do things without me. only golf n thats not cheap. anyway, congratulations! to you n all your family. just what was needed for you all n to remember how precious life is. its not always bad news. again im so pleased for you n your family.

lots of love leonie xxxxx

Thank you Lonie you are so thoughtful

x

CONGRATULATIONS !!!!!What lovely news.Have they decided on a name? My grandson was born 6 weeks after my diagnosis and i was  so glad that I was still here to see him.I have since seen his sister and our sons daughter .They bring us so much joy.You cuddle him all you can.

Rose xxxx

Thankyou Rose, he is called Joseph James, so I think it will probably be shortened to JJ.  They are home now so I am going to visit for cuddles later. 

In 9 months I have had cancer and a Grandson, seems really strange, but I am so pleased to be feeling so much better and able to help them out instead of the other way around.

Thanks

anne

x

Thankyou Rose, he is called Joseph James, so I think it will probably be shortened to JJ.  They are home now so I am going to visit for cuddles later. 

In 9 months I have had cancer and a Grandson, seems really strange, but I am so pleased to be feeling so much better and able to help them out instead of the other way around.

Thanks

anne

x

hi everyone

thinking of u all big congrats to new grandmas xxxxxx well done u xxx lots of cuddles xx

love and hugs xxx

Congratulations, thats wonderful news, love the name xx

hi colly is the magnet still working? just read your post it tickled me i'm having a hysterectomy on the 8th which will send me in to early menopause so i'll try anything that will help with symptoms thanks donna xx

Hi Donna I would say the magnet has reduced the night sweats a good bit, but still having flushes during the day, not so good hate these side effects, but suppose thats what chemo does to you, I posted on your other page to ask you how docs knew your cancer had spread or when did you find out, ive finished all my treatment and theyve said no scans, im worried that some horrible we cell has escaped, i feel as tho im a total worrier now about my health and never used to be xx

Hi colly I'll have a look for one of those magnets. I put a reply on my thread for you,I know how you feel I worry about the slightest thing now I woke up this morning with a sore throat and my first thought was what if it's spread to my throat which I know is stupid but I suppose we can't help ourselves.but try not to worry about things and just chill out and relax  I know it's easier said than done.Donna xx

Hi  Bonjovi, yep I know all about worrying about every pain or slight bump under the skin and now i do know how these other lovely ladies and gents have felt about being paranoid. I started having what i thought at first were hot flushes and then wasnt so sure as they seemed to be a bit different from what others experienced. However, night sweats were blooming awful. Now i keep a cold glass of water or bottle of water by the bed, and a wet flannel in a bowl beside the bed. I rub it on my head neck and wrists when i burn up and the flush goes very very quickly. In fact as mad as it sounds, i am having fewer of them and wondered if maybe by conteracting the effects they have lessened. I also carry wet wipes so i can cool off if i am out. It really helps.

i am trying to get back to some sort of normality now chemo is over, but i am looking for some advice on radio if any one can help. I know it sounds mad after coming through the chemo and i ony have 3 weeks plus a booster of radio, but i am terrified. Is there anyone who didn't have the tattoos? i am so worried about tiredness, and i thought a short walk (20 mins) to my local hospital to catch the free bus to the cancer hospital and a walk back might ease the fatigue, but I don't know anyone who has been through this thing or how it affects you. The doc at the cancer hospital said that tiredness was partly due to the waiting around at the hospital - which i can identify with - its a long day! For the first time in what seems like forever, i am so positive, i have come through the chemo, i am coping with things at home, finances are sorted and my birthday is next week and i can go swimmingand have a drink before the radio!!! But the unknown is driving me mad!

Also to the new people here, I do not know how i would have coped without the love warmth and adivce from everyone here. It is thanks to them that i have come through the emotional and physical difficulties of dealing with this awful disease. It is always heart wrenching to hear yet another person has a diagnosis, but here you are not alone and the help and advice is invaluable. We will all do our best to help you through.

Love to all my special friends here

sara xxxxxxxxx

Hi Sara how's you honey? Don't worry too much about radio, it is a walk in the park compared to chemo, I'd say it is tiring because you need to go every day, I went for 6 weeks, but to be honest I was fine. The tattoos I did get but it's 2 little dots size of a pin head, can't even find them when I look for them, dunno if everyone gets them, basically I was told it's so they no when you're getting radio where to line you up so they blast the right bit, the boost is much quicker session, just use the aqueous creme, I did but still got burned tho that was after 4th week so you may be ok, I was told not to swim till after 4 weeks of finishing radio as chlorine can irritate the skin. Hope this helps. Maybe the sweats are less frequent because your chemo is over and your body is getting back to normal, did you still have a period before starting chemo? I've been told mine will prob never come back as I'm on tamoxifen for 5 years. I also keep water and a wet flannel at side of bed, def helps. Lots of live col x

Hi all

big hi to those just joined sorry to meet u in these circumstances but we are all here to chat and help xxxx

Sara Colly is right radio is breeze compared to chemo . I have my last on tomorrow !!!! boob is sore has been for about last week I had same regieme as u 3 weeks then week booster .its very quick its just going every day is drag. my boob is just like sunburn sorest bit is underneath(thats the droop !!) 1%hydrocortisone cream helps bit but its not that bad boob feels bit numb /tngly but please dnot worry its fine nothing like chemo .Just need keep skin hydrated. I think its cruel irony that it looks like sunburn when u cant put it in sun !!!!I love the sun gonna have try cope with that one !!

I havent got much time to enjoy my treatment ending I am having knee op on 8th march and will b on crutches 4-8 weeks but will keep lookin forward i may be on here alot as i will be stuck at home !!!!

hope you all doing ok Colly loved your hol pics . Sara have lovely birthday . love to alll

love hugs nina xxxxxxxx

Hi Nina thanks, its amazing how well we can look compared to what I looked like during chemo, my face was the size of a ball and I was all puffy, I too love the sun and when I was in fuerteventura 2 weeks ago I had on factor 50, now im a factor 10 then 8 then 2 girl, but to be honest I got a lovely tan, I just wore boob tube tops to cover up the boob area and put a little cotton top up round my neck area where nodes were removed, so lots of high factor and stay covered up during 12 and 2 ish. Have a lovely day, sun is shining here in Scotland xx

Hi Sara

As Colly and Nina have said, rads is a breeze compared to the chemo. I had 4 weeks and found it was the few weeks after that my skin reacted.  Also found my skin generally has been very sensitive, I come out in red blotches at times around my neck and on my face and my eyelids are dry and itchy.  I thought  I was allergic to the cat we have just taken in but I think it is all related to the chemo, herceptin and letrozole.  Hope they get better soon as it is a pain not been able to put make up on.  Still I am feeling loads better and getting stronger everyday, have bought some plants today and just been out putting them in the garden, in between the showers!  Anyway good luck with the treatment I am sure you will be fine and don't worry about the tatoos you will never find them after.

Lovely pic Colly, cannot wait to get in the warm sunshine, we are off to Majorca in April.

Good luck Nina with the op, hope you are not laid up for too long.

It is sunny here at the mo - hope you all have some sunshine in your life today.

xx