Hi I'm 45 and just found out that a lump I had on my breast is cancerous, I had lump and lymph nodes removed last tues, so I'm now waiting to hear what treatment I'm going to need, My consultant has said most likely 8 sessions of chemo every 3 weeks, so 6 months in total and then radiotherapy mon-fri for a month, so i'm kinda in the unknown zone at the moment. Not looking forward to the hair loss, terribly vain i know, but my hair is very important to me like most women, I colour it blonde which will obviously have to stop. As far as I know my chemo will be given intrevenously, so my hair will most probably fall out. I am going to look into getting a real hair wig as I dont think i've got the guts to go au natural, I've also picked up a couple of bandanas to wear about the house. My partner says it doesnt matter if my hair falls out, as long as i'm here. Luckily I've found the lump very early by self examination whilst on holiday and my consultant is very positive about me getting better. I'm very wary about the next 9 months but feel quite determinded that chemo is a wonder drug and will make me better. My girls are 22 and 20 and are amazing, they have read stories in magazines about Kylie, sally from corrie etc and are determined I will just do what the doc says and get better, my partner who ive only been with for 2 years is the most wonderful guy ever, dunno what I'd do without him, he's been with me every step of the way. I was worried about losing my breast, but fortunately I had a lumpectomy which looks amazing. my consultant says put your life on hold for the next 6-9 months get better and you'll never look back, oh yeah sounds easy, but im trying really hard. I hope I'm still this positive whilst I go through my treatment (def not I hear you say) lol, but I'm a determined ***!

Hope to chat to others in the same situation xx

hi colly

just had my lump and nodes removed thursday (12th Aug) so will know my treatment shortly. I am expected to have radiotherapy and chemo but i thought radiotherapy came first, seems on here it is the other way around - perhaps I wasn't listening. I'm feeling a bit daunted at what comes next but more so for the effect it will have on the family - i worry too about not being the glamourous vital woman i was and will that change my realationship with my partner and so on. Although we are planning to get married. So much to talk about! it would appear you will be going through treatment at around the same time as me, so if you would like to stay in touch and discuss our good and bad days, please do !!! my email is simplysara1@hotmail.com

wishing the best of luck to you

sara

thinking of you

let me know how it goes.good advice re thinking of someone/something eles when needles about i will be dreaming of dr mc dreamy (greys anatomy )

take care

lots love nina xxx

thanks anne

iam doing ok hope you are

my girl has just showed me how to use skype so we can chat went she at uni. i am so gonna misss her when weekend is over then i will think about monday one thing at time

take care thats for your support

love hugs nina xxxxx

Hi Dizzy

Yes my first one was in the back of the hand and then I had a PICC line put in. As I am having herceptin for a further 9 months afer the chemo I was given this option and also my veins are not the best so it will save them getting too damaged. You may be able to have this done if you want, it does mean that it is in all the time and I have to have it flushed through once a week. Some people may not like the idea of something being stuck in their arm for a year! It does not hurt and have learnt to live with it.

I hope all went well today, just take it easy over the next few days, you will feel back to normal I am sure this time next week.

Love

Anne

x

Hi all,

nina i hope you are feeling a bit brighter - if any consolation I had a wobbly sunday and thought i was over it, then after a bottle of red monday, thought things were fine. Head hits the pillow and out it comes, me sobbing like a baby. I thought with my other half being partially deaf he woudn't know, but he did and he just held me. I felt better i think for just letting it out - we can't be brave all the time. sending you two arms (one stronger than the other thanks to the biospy!) to wrap around you when you feel blue.

i havent started my chemo yet and i am still waiting for the results of the second op. it all goes in one ear and out the other. I really cant remember if it was to check for pre cancerous cells or just to remove more of a margin as a precaution. But now I will not know until Wednesday. I asked my nurse about chemo and frm what i remember of that converstation it should be about 4 weeks, and then 6 cycles, third weekly. I will prob have hormone tablets too as i have half oestrogen sensitivity (or what ever they call it!). I have prepared myself mentally as best as you can do for a possibl masstectomy, only thing is it might delay the chemo, i want to get started so chemo will finish roughly two to three weeks before my 45th. Any excuse to celebrate each phase, and moving forward. And HAPPY BIRTHDAY to those of you celebrating this week. i am nervous, but with the needle thingy - ---

most of us had kids so know a contraction lasts between 50 and 70 seconds. a midwife told me to stop concentrating on the contractions and imagine walking up a steep moountain with huge effort and keep and eye on the clock, so when the peak of the contraction hit, i would be at the top of the mountain and ready to 'roll down'. All that kept going through my head was 'jack and jill went up the hill...... anyway now when i am faced with the needle, i turn my head and think of either something wonderful - children, flowers in the field, and count the wonderful things i can see in my mind, or i i try and remember everyones birthdays in date order, and all the while, in the other hand, i press my nails into the palm to see if i can peirce the skin. Result is - i forget the needle the hand hurts and the memory is proved to be failing...... but we can't have it all !!! and for a couple of quid at the chemist, you can ge some emla or other numbing cream.

So today, i have coloured my hair - the grey was coming through, had some very short layers cut in to give some body so it resembles the wig (lol!) and for a once in ablue moon change, mascara eyeshadow, blush and lipstick. Now the old man (gorgeous he is really!) will really wonder what the hell is going on - can't remember the last time i wore any makeup. i thought it would be good to practice after a good facemask to remind me how simple it is, for when I really need it!

Caz i love the way you have turned around, i am so glad you could laugh about it, laughter is a great healer, and apparantly keeps the wrinkles at bay too.

I have been using my exercise bike and getting around half a day - sometimes more effort than others in terms of what i put in. However, not only starting to feel better and mroe ready to face the dreaded chemo, but my daughter (16) came into the bathroom this morning and took one look at my half naked bottom and said ' your bum looks nice and toned now.' what a boost to a 44 year old ! im thinking of not wearing the low cut dress for the wedding now, but rather one that is long at the front and short enough to show of my bum at the back,,,,,,, what do you think....??????? show off your best assets and all that ...?

i have mentioned before about the support on here being wonderful, and how it would be really good to find out who is reasonably local or who would like to meet up if the chance arose. I live in W london, not far from heathrow airport, but could travel.

My email/msn is as my screen name - then 1 at hotmail.com I access email frequently, so if anyone fancies a chat.......

Love sara xxxx

hi girls

happy birthday to the ladies celebrating this week, hope you managed to enjoy yourselves with all whats going on. n a big hello to the ladies that have joined this page. i hope we can help you get through this traumatic time. best of luck for your treatment.

sorry i havent been on much lately. i havent been that good since radio finished. i still feel quite ill n have had stess/muscle pain in my neck, shoulders n back. cant get rid of it. husbands been trying to massage the knots which helps a bit then after a couple of hours up i just cant hold my head properly. so annoying but then when you think of what the body n mind go through, its understanderble.

my legs work so much better now n with half the pain. so i can walk a lot more than before n have enjoyed lunches, walks, shopping n a night out with the girls. no dancing for me though yet. yes ladies i went out with my burnt, swollen, lopsided boob n enjoyed myself loads. i had my hat on, no mascara(they are growing but not enough to decorate) n new clothes. my girlfriends are all gorgeous but didnt feel too much out of place. there was a group out on stag do who came over to chat, n bless them, when they heard my news, bought a bottle of champers for me to celebrate. was so sweet, it made our night.

rose its so nice to see you! glad you put a pic up. how are things with you n your family? i hope you are feeling well. i think im brave enough to put a pic up without a hat on now. show you ladies how much hair i have now 3 months after chemo.

sara good luck for your results, be thinking of you. caz hope you are ok after your op. been thinking of you all week. best go cos of my neck, bloody thing.

lots of love to you all leonie xxxxxxx

Hi Lonie,

Sorry that you are still having problems,you are always so upbeat bless you.I,m glad you had a night out and treated to champers as well!!

The family are fine thanks,our son and DinLaw have stopped holding the baby as if she is made of glass and she is sleeping well so that is the main thing.I,m godd,still get breathless and tired and a couple of niggly bits but still get to do most things .Started Christmas shopping,I love christmas !!

Hopefully you will be feeling much better by then :love:

Hope you have a good weekend

Rose xxx

Hi guys,

I got out of hospital on friday

I have still got a drain in either side and if I am honest, still feeling pretty poorly and quite sick.

But just thought I would let you know that I am back and my gorgeous husband is looking after me so well and I'm starting my recovery

I will be back in here in a few days

Can't get over how tired I am

Love to all

Caz xxx

Hi Caz

Glad to hear you are now home and starting to recover, it will take a time but you seem a strong girl and I am sure with all the support you will make a speedy recovery. The anesthetic will take a while to get out of your system and you will feel really tired, just listen to your body and rest well.

All the best.

Anne

xx

Oh I,m so excited to hear from you:grin: Of course you are tired,you have had major surgery and been stressed to the hilt with all the stuff before.

Rest well Caz/

Rose xxx

Great to hear from you, Caz.

You'll be groggy for a few days so don't worry. Let everyone around you do the fetching, carrying, worrying - you just get your feet up and take your time. You'll be back in the land of the living soon.

Shents

xx

Great to hear from you, Caz.

You'll be groggy for a few days so don't worry. Let everyone around you do the fetching, carrying, worrying - you just get your feet up and take your time. You'll be back in the land of the living soon.

Shents

xx

dear all

glad to hear from u caz thinking of you love hugs

have my first chemo in 2 hours feeling bit scared but bring it on !!by 2nite i will be saying just 5 more to go

love to all nina xxxx

Hi Nina

good luck with your chemo Im now on my 4th ready for my 5th in 2 weeks time, and though it may seem like an eternity away, the time does go quickly and soon you will be fee of all this, you will have bad days and good days but you will get through this.

all the very best

Lee xx