Hi, I was taken into hospital in February with stomach pains to be told they had found a blockage/mass in my colon and wanted to immediately operate- which they did. It was stage 4 bowel cancer and they have since also found a mass in my liver and in one of my remaining lymph nodes.

I’m waiting for the consultant discussion next week but have been given a heads up it’s likely 6 months chemo to shrink and then possible op on my liver. But the scans I had were a month ago… so I’m worried now that another month has passed waiting for the treatment and it might have spread more and the prognosis may not be as favourable. I’m terrified of it spreading.

Im a fit and active 42 year old woman and have two young children so I’m desperately trying to keep up the facade that I’m ok, but I keep wondering why this has happened to me! How? Why?

Im 8 or so weeks post op from the open hemicolectomy and with the prospect of at least 6 months of chemo (or hearing it’s got worse while I’ve been waiting)… I’m quietly screaming inside every day while putting on a brave face for my kids.

 
Has anyone got any advice for me or been through the same? It feels quite lonely despite having great friends and close family as I don’t want to burden them when they are already so upset for me.

Thanks for reading x