Oh how I feel for you. I am one of seven children and despite so many siblings I has to deal with my younger brothers diagnosis of terminal cancer at the same time I has a sin in intensive care. They eventually moved him out the ward they put him on. Was a death ward. Omg I had heard. Of them but honestly didn’t know they really existed or not. It was appalling this old lady would get out of bed covered in her own mess. Nurses walked by and totally ignored her. I has to go ballistic to get my sons bed changed when he had wet it. On top of that I was running around for my brothers medication on one occasion I had pneumonia. Shortly after I was diagnosed with the exact same lung cancer as my younger brother. This is what I did my brother needed urgent injections but no local chemist has any now his wife could drive but she said she was petrified. All my sibling could drive and my brother daughter could drive. As soon as they found a chemist that had 6 of the injections in. I like a fool said oh I know were that is. As soon as I said it. My sister in law said Marj before you go for them you need to pick the prescription up from the doctors. Now. A first time ever I said I know we’re it is I didn’t say I was going. I know a few more in this room who knows were it i. One said I have no idea a couple said I can’t remember how to get there. I just stood up and said I am going to my son who also needs me you all know I have cancer myself. So let me make a suggestion to you all. Besides like my car as built in sat nave but I use google on my phone. I see a couple of cars out there with built in sat nav for those that do not have it use google on your phones to find places like I do but I assure you I do not need a sat nave to tell me were it is. So I suggest someone had better start google maps I am of to see my son. Which I did. Your husband as literally got to tell his brother he needs to carry 50% of the workload for their farther. I know if he doesn’t the brother will have your husband do it all tell him he’s going to have his farther draw up a new will and to exclude his brother unless he takes responsibility 50% responsibility. Your husband might not like saying it. But if your are string enough then you say it to his brother on your husbands behalf. I have noticed everyone are there but will not do anything unless forced. I have seen it many times same with my father I has to walk away out of disgust at the hospital when he died which by the way I only found out the night he died he’d. been in hospital 2 weeks with double pneumonia. Within a couple of hours of me getting there he went unconscious. A nurse came to me and said the times we nearly lost him but he kept saying your name but being the same as your mothers we got confused only until 2 nights ago one of your sisters said he means my sister. I was honest and told her no one let me know. Because I didn’t get on with my mum and one sister the others could have told me until tonight. I would have done what I did tonight when one of my brothers finally let me know. She said to me. He’s only been waiting for you. Now you have been together a few hours he’s gone into a coma state. I said he would have done that me being here or not she said no he kept fighting it. It’s because he saw you. He’s let go. I asked who’s decision it was to put him on end of life. She said he’s not on end of life he’s due for more tests. I said I guess no one told you what I used to do for a living and my farther is on end of life. I was a sister on intensive care for years so please do not try to fool me. I stopped when a RTA came in and it was my first husband. Word reached me while I was on duty in intensive care. I didn’t believe then until I saw him myself. I never nursed again after that. That was a good few years ago now. But that’s my story you have to go with him and tell the brother you will make sure you get his dad to change the will unless he takes on 59% of the care. I wish you well please let me know if it worked