My father in law was diagnosed with cancer in February. Since then my husband has dropped everything to go to him whenever he calls , has an appointment , needs tablets sorting etc. We have 4 grandchildren but they have had to take a back seat as my husband has no time for them or me. He has a single brother who does the bare minimum and he’s only took him 4 times for appointments since it started. He’s had 2 holidays abroad,kept all his holidays for himself, and hasn’t come out of work once to help. My husband has come out of work, lost a lot of money and when we booked a week in Norfolk , his brother rang him, as his dad sent answering the phone, when he could  have just popped round. I am at my wits end as I feel I have lost my husband through this. We are arguing constantly , as I would like him to have a serious talk with his brother so that moving forward the time is more evenly shared and we get my husband back . I fear it’s too late as it’s all my husband does, talks about and he has no interest in anything else. I work full time, and try to keep things normal for the grandchildren, but his Dad is very demanding and has been abusive and not at all grateful for the things my husband has given up. My first husband had cancer at 26 when I coped with him, a full time job and 2 small children and I nursed my father though oesophagus cancer, so I am struggling to keep it together when my husband seems to be unable to not focus on his Dad.