hey, Flossyanne, yes,  hit me this week, been going strong but after 4 cycles of the same I feel very low, considering counselling, lost my partner to cancer 2 yrs ago so live on my own, very lonely journey x

I am so sorry to hear you are experiencing similar to me, I wish I had reached out for mental support right back when I started to struggle but I was always taught to pull my socks up and get on with things! and I unfortunately left it too long so seek help.

please dont be afraid to reach out for help now, Gp, and McMillan can be great places to start.

stay in touch if this helps

very best wishes and good luck

x

I am so sorry to hear you are experiencing similar to me, I wish I had reached out for mental support right back when I started to struggle but I was always taught to pull my socks up and get on with things! and I unfortunately left it too long so seek help.

please dont be afraid to reach out for help now, Gp, and McMillan can be great places to start.

stay in touch if this helps

very best wishes and good luck

x

Thankyou. I probably will, so how did you get on mentally? More importantly, how’s your Cancer journey? Whereabouts are you up to now if you don’t mind me asking? How are you feeling? Sending love and support and positive vibes to you Xx

Hi again, I finished my treatment at the end of august last year after having 15 months of treatment, chemo & immunotherapy, op,  radiotherapy then extra immunotherapy. I have suffered with mental instability probably starting from 7 months into treatment and now I’ve reached a point where some days I don’t know how to carry on but can find strength to be me on other days, I am currently free of cancer which is amazing but that makes it harder to understand my mental state.

what have you got left in way of treatment?
Feel free to share if it helps.

sending huge buckets of support and very very best wishes 

Hi there, understand totally mine (very low mood) was out of the blue and unexpected. I wonder if it’s the side effects of all the cyto toxic drugs, you know a chemical reaction, because like you on the face of it I feel okay, but my brain well-being says otherwise it’s quite different from depression ive felt before it’s like I can see myself from outside looking in it is yours the same? I’m four months in just finished my fourth cycle of Carboplatin  and Paclitaxel every week. 3 weekly cycle. It’s been exhausting and I move onto epirubicin and cyclophosphamide Next for another four cycles and then surgery in May,  I’m hoping only a lumpectomy and then they say or chemo and radiotherapy because it’s triple negative I’m terrified of it spreading and coming back. Apparently the statistics are high? Thats my biggest fear. 
looks like I’ve got a long way to go yet, they haven’t been very specific about what follows surgery - I don’t understand, I suppose it depends on what they find - did you have lumpectomy or mastectomy and also the other thing is they haven’t actually staged me which I find concerning just graded me. I’m grade 3. But like you some days, I feel quite upbeat positive and able to look forward and on other days I feel quite frozen with fear I like I don’t know how to live anymore. So big pathetic and weird when I’m actually actually quite an optimistic and positive person. But I have no support having lost my partner and no supportive  family, so it’s all a bit weird.

So nice to meet you, Thank you so much for your replies. Feels like us triple negative breast cancer ladies are fewer and far between xxx

Oh my goodness, totally feeling what you’re going through and so similar to me, I was grade 3 triple negative, had right mastectomy and auxiliary lymph node clearance where they found that my 10cm tumour had shrunk to 3 cm and all my lymph nodes were cancer free following  the chemo immuno. They followed it up with radiotherapy and further immunotherapy, hopefully providing my best chance of staying cancer free. 

Like you I’ve always been a really positive person, able to cope with everything that’s been thrown at me but, like you, out of the blue some days I feel suicidal yet other days I feel like me again, apart from the side effects that remain, dizziness, hands have sensitivity to cold water and I constantly need a hot water bottle for my feet! I also have altered sensitivity to light and sound and very pretty blue light flashes from my right eye and infrequent white from my left both peripherally, this is becoming less with time though.

i haven’t had the out of body experience but I have had memory loss when I’ve switched into crazy lady mode! Which is such a new thing for me and quite scary.

im so glad you’ve reached out to me, please stay in touch, I might not always be able to respond immediately but I will as soon as I can.

let’s beat this, and find the strength to come through stronger than before

sending a huge hug 

x

Goodness I’m so pleased to find you personalises it a lot …Have you found insensitive comments from anybody and his dog about their, their sister and their neighbour who died from breast cancer and going into the morbid details - I know they don’t realise  how insensitive they’re being but goodness it’s upsetting when they talk about them passing away & don’t give a fig about how that might leave us feeling?! it’s a lottery isn’t it - that’s very scary. 
bless you your vision issues sound annoying yet pretty…. good luck with those I hope they resolve over time…

so was your op to cut out the 3cm tunour?…,,mines same size….again how coincidental! I’m also on immuno sorry forgot to say…… are you in uk btw or overseas? 

no rush to get back like you not always on here, but so lovely to connect, thankyou xx

Good morning!

yes, oh my goodness yes! The amount of people who go on to tell me about someone they know, or someone they know who knows of some one, who’s just died. I now smile sweetly and tell them I’ve been very luck to have been on a revolutionary hard hitting cocktail of drugs for treatment, and then overwrite the experience when it pops back in my head with 3 things I like, 2 things I’m grateful for and 1 thing that makes me smile. 

yes my op was to remove my 3 cm tumour which was 10cm before the chemo and immuno, they removed my right breast and the lymph nodes under my arm. they confirmed that the lymph nodes and surrounding breast tissue was cancer free, but still went ahead with the further immuno and radiotherapy to boost my survival chances.

on a positive note, I know of one lady who just had chemotherapy and mastectomy and she’s going strong and remains cancer free 5 years on. She was also triple negative 

im uk and had oncology treatment in Bristol. Where are you having yours?

oh, by the way the first 2 rounds of EC/pembro were easy compared to the 4th paclitaxel and carboplatin and immuno! 

hope the sun is shining with you today!

x