Hi there ..

So so sorry your going through this sad time right now ...  I had a grade 3 breast cancer in 2017 ... and total right masectomy... so I know we have to make the most of every day ... no one is guaranteed tomorrow... so I've just taken every day as a bonus ... 

I lost my mum when i was 36 ... to a heart attack and I had no chance to even tell her I was so proud to be her daughter... the up side of us is we have the chance to say those things to people we love .. yea it's scary ... and everyone who's had a cancer diagnoses knows it just sits on our shoulder...

I don't want a Dr to tell me how long .. then I'd stop living each day as I do now ... so when my bones hurt and I've pain somewhere, I'll just deal with it and carry on ...

You were blessed to have had many times after your first round, and you have a wonderful man by your side ... so I'd say, try not to think of the future ... say I'm here today, I'll make new memories ... enough for a lifetime ... weather we have weeks / months or a few years ... and yea we need people like you on here .. so many new diagnosis... or those waiting for results ... or treatments... and many more read threads but don't answer .. so never dout how many you will help along your journey... 

Hold on to every day ...  sending you a vertual hug.... Chrissie x

Hi Chriss

What a lovely reply to violetrose

Best wishes

Laney

Hi Chrissie

thank you so much for your wonderful reply.  You are so right in all you say. I too lost my mum and dad when I was 40 and was lucky to be able to say goodbye as they both had cancer.  Your mum would have known the love you had for her, can't hide anything from a mum xxxxx

I am blessed in so many ways, my husbands with his children and grandchildren who call me nanny. I never had kids.  What hurt was that I was finally happy with the man of my dreams and lovely wedding with everyone we love it just felt like life threw me a curve ball because I was being happy. My partner I had been with for 30 years died in 2015 and it was a happy relationship, not like the love I have found with my husband.  I want to live for today.  I try to not think but it's like an argument in my head and that awful feeling like you want to run and run when you wake up and remember you're ill.  I will fight this all the way kicking and screaming but sometimes I'd just like life to give me a break xxxxxx

Hi ...

Trust me, I know too well what you mean ... I've just lost my granddaughter to acute myeloid leukaemia last week .. she was just 18 ... just starting out on life ... but she smiled through everything ... cancer took her, but he couldn't take that magical smile away ... 

And my amazing , kind, ausome niece who nursed her mum ( my sister) for years from dementure , is now going through her cancer journey .. she's the kindest soul I know ... 

You see cancer doesnt care , it has no compation ... it doesn't care of age , male or female , a kind soul or anything ... it just knows how to inflict this crule pain ... 

I'm so with you ... after my sister died in March,  and 3 of us had been through breast cancer ... like you, I just wanted a break ... surely my granddaughter would kick it's butt ... as she was so young ... but no, it rebelled in causing more overwhelming heartache ... 

But all we can do is look cancer in the eye, and make every day count ... that's what we did for Jess... even with covid stopping us seeing her ... only mum and dad allowed ...  cancer wants those like us to crumble and let it win ... but if you take every day, and stick two fingers up to cancer ... it may take our bodies, but not our love of life and making every day count ... then cancer looses ... 

I'm here most days .. though not so often these last few weeks.... but I will be back ... sticking two fingers up to cancer as well ... so if you need a hand to hold along the way , I'm here ... 

You are braver then you know ... yes cuss, scream, cry .... then stand back up ... there's lots of us with you on this cancer rollercoaster ride... hold on tight ... but together well help each other ... Chrissie  

Hope you don't mind a man answering your string, i quite often join in with the ladies.

I've been stage 4 since February 2016 and on palliative care my cancer spreads and recedes depending on treatment no cure just living with my uninvited guest.

Chrissie is a lot better with words than me, but i try to help where i can. 

I was working till last year, metal fabrication and welding lifting cutting plenty of muck and dust. But retired to look after my disabled wife she needs 24 /7 care she has Alzheimers and parkinsons plus other problems I'm her official carer.

Main thing is keeping positive and keep fighting. 

Best wishes. 

Billy

P.s my cancer has gone from prostate to lymph nodes, spine, ribs, pelvis and a lung. 

Hi Billy

of course I don't mind. My dad had prostate cancer for a very long time bless him.  You have your hands full. I'm sorry to hear about your wife, altzheimers alone is such an awful thing but to have the other illnesses on top, leaves me without words.  
 

I am trying to be positive, and I do have the odd day where I see clearly that today is important, not what's gone and what's coming but to be for today.  But it's just overwhelming me.  I feel like I've become cancer. I am under the local hospice who mentioned the word palliative and I nearly ran.  I'm so scared.

 I'm extremely lucky compared to what you are coping with and I will try harder to sort my head out.  I wish I could be hypnotised to not know what I have.  It would be bliss.

Words fail me.  I'm so sorry for your losses Chrissie.

I just want to do what you say and make the most of my time and not waste it.  I just struggle and my depression about it gets worse.  I lost my dad, mom and partner to it.  I'm so scared of anyone else getting it, in fact I'm glad it's me and not someone I love.  I said to Billy I wish I could n

be hypnotised to forget, so that I could go through the days without remembering I'm ill and planning my funeral..... that's how I'm thinking..... I'm literally thinking about when I go, sorting the garden so it doesn't need caring for by my husband so he has it nice, making the house neutral so he can move on and find someone when I'm gone and there aren't glaring reminders of me.  
 

forgive me but it's still hurting xxx

Hi Violet

Am sorry to read your going through this rubbish time, I was diagnosed with TN grade 3 stage 2 in Nov.

There is a few of us TN ladies in a discussion called Just been diagnosed, BC - triple negative, please feel free to join in with us if you would like to.

Linda x