Breast cancer/lymph node reassurance please

Hi everyone 

I had a lumpectomy on 20th June, and tbh I have been pretty positive ever since as I had been told my lymph nodes were showing as clear on the ultrasound and mri I had.

However, today I got my results back, and although my margins are 4mm clear, I have been told that the lymph node wasn’t clear.

I have had to be given diazepam by my GP, who unfortunately didn’t really do much to reassure me.

I am now facing another op to remove more lymph nodes (not sure how many).  And I feel like I have just gone back to the first couple of weeks in May when I got my original diagnosis.

i have read other threads on here, and I can see what a positive bunch you are, I’m just hoping someone can help me to feel more positive as I am Prone to anxiety and panic attacks

xxx

  • Thank you Marlyn, I think my problem is I had convinced myself that I would get the news I wanted to hear yesterday, every time the thought that it may be in my nodes crept into my head I pushed it away.  So yesterday was just such a punch in the stomach.

    i am absolutely terrified at the thought of chemotherapy.

    I haven’t told anyone except my husband, as I really wanted to be able to say, look, I had this but now it’s gone.  I know some will think I should share the burden, but I really prefer it this way.  My husband is a very calm person and that really helps.

    i guess it just seems like hearing the words “spread to lymph nodes” it just terrifying to me.  My girls are 11 and 12, and the what ifs just wont leave me alone right now.

    i just praying that it has just gone to that one and no further, but I really not hopeful.  Also, I may not be able to have the op for almost 3 weeks as my surgeon is away for a week, then another 2 weeks to get results. 

    Time goes so slowly at the moment.

    i guess that’s why I’m on here looking for reassurance as I’m not the toughest cookie!

    thank you

    xx 

  • Your actually stronger than you think! My nodes were clear but chemotherapy was advised anyway....as a flush.....I just wanted to throw everything I possibly could at it...

    in the beginning I admit, the time drags, I kept wishing the year away, now we're just over halfway through....I've ticked off chemotherapy and radiation.....it's not over yet but here I am...

    It's about being scared but jumping in anyway....I  holding your hand, we can do this xxx

     

  • If your husband is very calm he's the perfect person to tell your problems to, let your heart out to him he can be there better than we can let him cuddle you tell him what's wrong, God bless.. 

    Billy 

  • Thank you Billy, he reassures me all the time, he truly is my rock. But it is also good to talk with people who have experienced it themselves, you don’t truly understand it until it happens to you, do you? When you hear other people’s stories, when you haven’t had it, it is very upsetting and you feel such compassion and sadness for them, but you never really understand that gut churning feeling when you’re told you have it. I wish you well Billy, I trust you have family around you to give you support also xx
  • Thank you Marlyn,  your words mean so much to me.  I was told I would t. See chemotherapy before, and it was such a relief as the thought terrified me.  Do you mind me asking....was it as bed as I heard? I will obviously go through with it if that is the advice I am given, as I am willing to do anything to get rid of it.  But you hear such bad things about it, which is why I am so scared.  I know I’m jumping to conclusions again, sorry! 

    Do you mind me asking what you have left to tick off now?  I hope you can feel like you have beaten it, if not now, then very soon 

     

    xxx

  • I don't mind you asking me anything, no question is a silly one ....

    chemo was no walk in the park, but it is completely doable. You get your good days and your bad days, I have a friend who sailed through it....

    im now on 3 weekly injections for the foreseeable and hormone inhibitors and bone strengthening meds...

    i will send you a friend request....xxx

  • Thank you, that would be lovely xx

  • Hi sugarpuff just a note I have no family to look after me I'm actually looking after my disabled wife she needs 24 /7 care it gets fiddly sometimes but we manage especially when i go for C treatment, all our family is married with family of there own we basically on our own, when i go shopping a neighbour comes round to check on Mrs but that's it,. Best wishes.

    Billy 

  • BillyGoat, your an inspiration! And you still find time to pop in here .....thank you xxx

  • I am sorry to hear that Billygoat, how amazing you are, your wife is lucky to have you.  The fact that you take the time to chat to and reassure people like me is admirable, I wish I could help you more, take care xx