Hi i understand sometimes putting it in words helps i dont know why but we feel its o important we have lost our partners and the world needs to know i and many many others feel that way its i way of working it out for yourself by telling others .time makes the pain dwindle and know matter what people say or we would go mad the thing is. Its what you do with the time that helps have you tried bereavement counciling it realy helped me i joined a bereavement group it did help but wasnt manage very well and two emotional vampires hogged it but helped at begining.i know ime never going to get over the loss of my liz but i also know that hanging on to the pain and grief will only make it worse it gets to the point were people feel safe in there pain and stay there because it becomes the norm but its not healthy it makes everyone else suffer to .and kids pick up on it to .it isnt realy long since you lost your love so just try and soldger on .if you can work on the negative thoughts that will i did all sorts i thought if i keep thinking the pain isnt going then it will not and ill stick in this rotton hole of misery and only i will suffer .ime sorry your going through this rotton thing its been 10 months for me so i know it gets better best wishs to you and your kids i think you may have started yourself healing please come back it will realy help you feel your not alone in your pain share it with us .paul