Hi there ..

I was the same ... I looked like one of those nodding dogs when I heard the word cancer and grade 3 ..

It's always good to take someone with you and pen and paper to write down questions you want to ask .. and write down the answers and info .. I took my daughter in law, who explained everything to me after we got home ... 

I hid away after diagnosis for a whole day and a half .. not wanting anyone ... I think I got every emotion there is out ... and then felt like I was ready to get things together ... my daughter in law said ... no more what ifs ... no more looking to far ahead ... well live in the day and take every problem as and when it comes up .. and we'll do it together ...

Well that snapped any last feelings of giving up ... got a pair of boxing gloves ... got into the cancer ring .. ready to trade it blow for blow ... there's lots of us breast lasses on here .. all in that same ring .. all trying to kick cancers butt ... and together we help each other through .. all the highs and lows ..

Cancer doesn't want us strong... it wants us to buckle and stay down ... but we all felt like you in those early day .. looking back that was the hardest part .. the unknown ... well last July I had a masectomy.. and a wonderfull lady on here got me through those hard days @jolomine ​​​​​​... and I was dreading looking down and seeing a scar where my boob used to be .. but it's o.k .. it reminds me of the journey I've had ..So hold on in there ... you can do this .. we know what your feeling .. you'll get lots of support on here ..Chrissie x

Hi Dahlia,

I'm so sorry that you have to join us here. Waiting for results is always a scary time, especially when there are so many uncertainties connected to  a cancer diagnosis. You will find that you emotions are all over the place at present and you may cry a lot. This is all a perfectly normal response and the tears are a good release valve, so let them flow.

My boobs were my pride and joy too, until I got this diagnosis 8 years ago. I had a lumpectomy then, but was diagnosed with a second bout 7 years ago. This time I had a double mastectomy followed by Letrozole for 6 years. I finished taking this in July 2017. I dreaded the idea of losing both breasts, especially as I couldn't have reconstruction because of previous surgeries.

In the event, I have managed well with various prostheses and still go to the gym and go swimming regularly.

Your recount of being informed of this news is pretty normal. It all becomes too much and, we seldom take it in. As you rightly said, your mind stops and goes into panic mode as soon as you hear the cancer word. It is worth knowing that we only ever recall a very small amount of the conversation from any consultation, which is why it is good to bring someone with you to all of your appointments. It is also a good idea to draw up a list of questions before each consultation. I always bring my hubby and we both have a copy of questions. Whilst I am asking my surgeon the questions, my hubby is busy writing down the answers. Don''t worry, your consultant will have seen this all before, so he won't be phased by it.

I'm glad to hear that you have told your family, as this is never an easy thing to do.

I shall be thinking of you on Tuesday and hope that it will be good news.

Please keep in touch and let us know how you get on. We are always here for you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Thank you both for taking the time to reply. It's good to have a place to have a bit of a whinge without upsetting everyone.  

Early night for me I think - onwards and upwards xxx

I had my lump removed 2 weeks ago it was a grade 3 and 16 mm in size , also had some lymph nodes removed . I was more scared of the operation then the cancer but to be honest it’s the waiting . I had the operation which went well and they removed the cancer which is great my tests came back triple negative so I have to have 6 sessions of chemo and some radiotherapy now I’m panicking about that as not sure what to expect, I hate the waiting game , just try and keep yourself busy . 

Yes I think keeping busy is the key to staying sane. I was just a bit thrown yesterday by the radiotherapy as that hadn't been mentioned before and I thought I was having reconstruction at the same time as the mastectomy.  It's also difficult seeing it all starting to take a toll on my family as it sinks in. 

It's the operation part that's freaking me out at the moment. My surgeon inspires confidence and I trust her it's just taking a bit of time to come to terms with it all. 

I'm glad your op went well. How long do you have to wait to start chemo?

Hi Dahlia,

I'm glad to hear that no spread has been detected - that is good news. We all liken our cancer journey to being on a rollercoaster, because of the ups and downs associated with the disease.

Unfortunately doesn't just affect the cancer patient, but also his relatives, so we can appreciate how they all feel after getting news of your diagnosis. You will find that things will improve for all of you when you have surgery and start treatment and, begin to fight this disease.

I am glad to hear that your surgeon inspires confidence in you. You really do need to have complete faith in your surgeon. I know that you are terrified at the thought of the op, but there really is nothing to worry about. Having had a lumpectomy and 2 mastectomies, I must confess that I has less bother with the mastectomies than the lumpectomy.

Don't forget to keep in touch and let us know how it goes. You still have a bit of a wait until 21st - we are always here for you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx