Hi there ...

So sorry your going through this now ... there's lots of us on this scary rollercoaster ride with you .. your not alone ... and your so right, some people you think would be there, just disappear and others you don't expect come through ... the ones that disappear arnt worth thinking about ... 

One thing Simerla to mine was your little boy ... I've always believed in gentle honesty ... I'm really close to my granddaughter (pic )   and she was 5 when my breast cancer was discovered.. and I had a grade 3 and needed mastectomy. . We told her nanny had something in her boob that was making me poorly .. and had to go in the hospital, where the Drs were gonna TRY to make nanny better ..

After a while, while waiting for op, she was sitting by me and asked if I was going to die ... I'd already told her my mum was a star up in the sky ... and the feathers we find are from her .. so I just said if I do, I'll be the star next to my mum's, and I'll always be there when she looks up, and I'll be looking at her too. 

She was really happy with that ... and was gentle when she came to hospital ... she has seen my missing boob, and just wanted to know how I'd feed babies now (I was 63) and she's chilled about the whole thing ..  I think if said in the right way, they need the truth .. otherwise they feel scared and know something's going on .. not too much info ... 

I think there's a children's book on cancer that McMillan do. If I remember right ... and they are great to answer your questions too .. they are there for family too .. just write down your questions so you don't forget anything .. hope that's a tad helpful ... Chrissie x 

Hi Andy,  what a horrible situation you are in.  Our grandchildren were only five, seven and ten when the lung diagnosis was made, we just said he was poorly and needed lots of love, the word cancer is scary for adults never mind little ones.  Rely on those who have taken your problems on board , don't waste time and energy on those more worried about themselves than willing to give help.  Speak to your Mc Millan nurses and see if they can put you in touch with services that will help.  You do feel you are slipping through the cracks but it will all fall into place they have goals that have to be met set by the Government.   There are nurses on this forum and you can call them if you need to.  Your GP may help as well, so use all the sources available to you.  The only advice I'll give you which was given to me by a friend who had been through the same thing, take each day as it comes and don't waste time thinking about what might happen tomorrow.   Keep posting and we'll help you if we can.  Carol.

Thanks Chriss, thats such a lovely way to put it "gentle honesty". We plan to tell our son and your message will help us with framing it. The friend thing yep those that have took a step forward will come with us along the journey and the others well they can fill their days with their issues. Thank you and hope you are doing well x

Thanks for the message Caz. The last few days of activity have started to line things up and she has a colonoscopy booked and then Chemo begins next friday. Appreciate your support 

I'm pleased things are moving forward.   Take care. Carol