Hi Sammy,

Sorry to hear your news, I sometimes think it's easier if it's something your going through yourself than someone you love so much so I dread to think how you must be feeling just now.

I'm probably not the best person to give advice on this one but having just been diagnosed with breast cancer I know that I want people to be normal with me.  You'll know your husband better than anyone so you probably already know how he will want you to behave, even if the shock of the situation makes you question yourself.  My husband and I talk about it, occasionally I'll say what is specifically worrying me, but most of the time we're talking about the kinds of things we usually talk about and having a laugh.

Aside from that it's really about making sure you also take care of yourself, it's too easy to neglect ourselves when loved ones are ill, but that is unhelpful to everyone.  Obviously check that your husband is happy with you discussing his condition with someone, but hopefully he should be as it's important for you to be able to talk about it with someone other than him.  At least that will give you some moral support.  Don't try to be superwoman, if other help is on hand accept it.  Give yourself some 'me time' regularly too.

I can't be sure what your husband will be worrying about, but I know being married and having a mortgage that I'm worried about not being able to contribute to it for a while.  So on the basis of not wanting to end up having to worry about money or anything (being ill can end up costing you a lot where I live) I'm already looking out my critical illness cover documents.  It wouldn't even have occured to me but for a friend mentioning yesterday in passing that they had been made a claim when her husband got sick.  But I'm grateful she thought to mention it as it's a practical thing we can sort out now (before I'm actually feeling sick) and it could prevent some stress down the line.  You might be able to think of some similar practical issues you can pre-empt and sort out now.

Sorry, rambling now, should really be heading to sleep.

Anyway, best wishes to you and your husband, I'll be around on here if you need a vent, grumble or to have a break from cancer chat and discuss something else entirely.

LJx

Hi Sammy,

Sorry to hear your news, I sometimes think it's easier if it's something your going through yourself than someone you love so much so I dread to think how you must be feeling just now.

I'm probably not the best person to give advice on this one but having just been diagnosed with breast cancer I know that I want people to be normal with me.  You'll know your husband better than anyone so you probably already know how he will want you to behave, even if the shock of the situation makes you question yourself.  My husband and I talk about it, occasionally I'll say what is specifically worrying me, but most of the time we're talking about the kinds of things we usually talk about and having a laugh.

Aside from that it's really about making sure you also take care of yourself, it's too easy to neglect ourselves when loved ones are ill, but that is unhelpful to everyone.  Obviously check that your husband is happy with you discussing his condition with someone, but hopefully he should be as it's important for you to be able to talk about it with someone other than him.  At least that will give you some moral support.  Don't try to be superwoman, if other help is on hand accept it.  Give yourself some 'me time' regularly too.

I can't be sure what your husband will be worrying about, but I know being married and having a mortgage that I'm worried about not being able to contribute to it for a while.  So on the basis of not wanting to end up having to worry about money or anything (being ill can end up costing you a lot where I live) I'm already looking out my critical illness cover documents.  It wouldn't even have occured to me but for a friend mentioning yesterday in passing that they had been made a claim when her husband got sick.  But I'm grateful she thought to mention it as it's a practical thing we can sort out now (before I'm actually feeling sick) and it could prevent some stress down the line.  You might be able to think of some similar practical issues you can pre-empt and sort out now.

Sorry, rambling now, should really be heading to sleep.

Anyway, best wishes to you and your husband, I'll be around on here if you need a vent, grumble or to have a break from cancer chat and discuss something else entirely.

LJx

Thank you for your message, we have just found out it is follicular lymphoma. He seems better than he was which is good. Sorry to hear about your diagnosis, bloody thing gets everywhere! 

Hi Sammy. I was diagnosed with non hodgkin lymphoma T cell last Oct. Heck of a shock as with us all but I have found great support and care along the way. I had three weeks radiotherapy and I have started Chemo on the 1st May. Have to have 6 sessions with three weeks in between . Starting to lose my hair too which I dread but it will grow again. Altogether it's very scary I know but it's a blood cancer that's treatable and maybe curable. So hang on in there and be positive together. I'm the biggest baby so if I can do it your lovely hubby will too I'm sure. Always here to natter xxx

Ooooh, that's one I'm going to have to look up!

Glad he's seeming a bit better just now, no doubt it will be ups and downs.  Keep in touch and keep us updated, and remember to take care of yourself!!!!!

LJx