Hello 

June 2017 was remarkable for 2 reasons. 1) I had the most fantastic 50th birthday celebrated in style with all my loved one ; family and friends. 2) I got diagnose with  cancer of one of my tonsils.

Shortly after my birthday , i went to my doctor as i had had swollen glands and what felt like tonsilitis in one side of my neck. I was expecting to get given some anti-biotics and all would be ok. My doctor (thankfully) had concerns and referred me to the hospital for an ultrasound scan to rule out cancer. My life turned upside down and i'm not ashamed to admit, i cried. Cancer is what other people get , not me is what went through my head.As a result of my ultrasound scan i had to have a MRI and subsequent CT scan as well as an initial biopsy. The results of these confirmed that i had cancer of the tonsil and that i would have to go to a specialist hospital 40 odd miles down the road. This is the last time that i cried. I knew it wasn't a dream. I met the members of the team that were ( and still are) helping me through it. Quickly followed a PET scan and had to have my radiotherapy mask made. In September , i started ,with the added support of the CompAre trial staff, my energy sapping 7 weeks of chemoradiotherapy which meant 6 hours in the chemo department every Monday and 35 radiotherapy sessions ( one a day , Monday to Friday). On week 2 i had a feeding tube fitted as the ulceration of my mouth and throat would eventually mean i wouldn't be able to eat.By week 5 i had to start using it to put Ensure drinks into my system  as i couldn't eat and was losing a lot of weight. I decided to keep my mask after completion of radiotherapy , not as a morbid reminder of things gone past but as a marker of where i started to live again, my new version of normal, if you like.My tastebuds haven't fully returned yet ( slowly but surely) and i still have thick saliva which makes eating bread, chocolate and some drier food dificult and i have a wobbly neck ( almost like a turkey) where the lymph fluid isn't draining properly (yet) BUT things are moving in the right direction. I have my feeding tube removed and my PET scan ( to see how well the treatment has worked) coming up over the next couple of weeks. All is looking positive.Keeping things in bite size (manageable) chunks and with the amazing support of the hospital staff and fantastic family and friends has kept me positive , smiling, laughing and joking through what is a traumatic time. I have met lots of other people who have cancer and they have been truly inspirational . I look forward to a bright and long , happy future but i know there are still more hurdle to jump before it is over. I know life will never be the same again but it has made me , my family and friends stronger than ever before. Sorry for waffling on.